DS nearly 4 has said this a few times over the last month or so. It is often after I’ve told him not to do something but not always, sometimes when we are having quiet time before bed. He said this evening that nobody likes him in this house because he’s been naughty. He hadn’t been naughty, he’d shouted and cried when his dad had taken his brother for a nappy change and I started the tooth brushing routine because he wanted his dad. I had encouraged him to come but not ‘told him off’.
To paint a picture, he is a bright and lively boy, full of energy, v strong willed and often defiant. Brimming with chat and questions. Very funny and quick witted. Very affectionate. Will rarely do anything I ask and responds very angrily to any boundary setting. Me getting cross escalates behaviour so I avoid this and calmly state for example ‘it’s ok to feel angry but it’s not ok to shout/hit’ etc etc. I think I have to boundary set a lot. I worry I’m on at him too much, I do try to pick my battles and let the small things go. He is so so emotional, will scream and cry if he gets his clothing wet, tear up
a picture after a few seconds of trying if it’s not as he’d like it. I give him space when he does this and he comes around on his own. No amount of positive phrasing tricks him; he knows I’m saying no in a nice way and that’s still no so he loses it ‘stupid mummy, I’m going to chop
yoir head off and hit the whole world’ is a common response.
I don’t know what to do. I love him
so much but find him a handful. I’ve wondered if he has ADHD or if this is in the realms of ‘normal’. He’s great at preschool. I am devastated to hear him say he thinks his family don’t like him and he wants to go to his grandparents and feel I’ve really fucked this parenting thing up. Sorry to drone on!