Hi fellow mums,
Not really sure how to word this…
DH, DC and I live a 23hr flight from grandparents. DC1 has cancer, DC2 arriving July. I am trying to work as full time as possible (for financial reasons) but am taking every bit of leave possible to support DC1 through chemo and other hospitalisations. Sometimes we are in a hospital isolation room for 3-4 days at a time. DC1, 22 months old, only learnt to sleep 2 weeks ago, and we still have multiple bad nights.
Mostly because of chronic sleep deprivation, I feel like I’ve become a shell of my former self. I’m scared to begin this next phase of sleep deprived life with a newborn in a few short months. I didn’t know DC1 had cancer when I became pregnant with DC2.
My parents want to “support” me by visiting, which in my mum’s mind means flying over the month before I give birth (in the hope I give birth early and she gets to attend), and my dad to visit after the birth for a month. DH doesn’t want either of them to come at all. My parents are so well-meaning but their visits are mostly because their marriage is very unstable and spending time with ME (not DC1 or DH) is enjoyable for them.
How do I turn my mindset around? Get excited for this next baby instead of dreading the impact on our sleep? How does anyone carve out any time for themselves?