Not singing to baby - should I make more effort?

[trrk]

I’m not musical at all, am possibly tone deaf (was told that by teachers at school a long time ago) and have always hated singing whether in public or alone. I do make a conscious effort to sing to my baby (now 9 months) as I know it’s meant to be good for development but I probably don’t do it often enough. I speak to her and read to her, it’s just singing I dislike. Will it harm her development if I don’t sing much. Should I make more effort? I feel guilty as I used to enjoy my Mum singing to us as children although my Dad is more like me and I’ve never heard him sing.

You sound like a lovely mum so please stop worrying. . Not singing to your baby won't harm his development at all. Not a jot. However, don't let your childhood experiences put you off. Your baby will love to hear your voice singing or otherwise and certainly won't be judging you.

Never sang to my 2 and they are both adults.

That should have had a "now" at the end of my post. Used to put a nursery rhymes tape on for them.

I don't think it will harm her development if you provide her with plenty of other stimulation (reading, playing music, etc) but it is just a nice thing to share with your child.

I NEVER ever sing around people, and rarely on my own along to the radio either, even though I love listening to songs. But when DS was a baby/young child I sang to him at bedtime, and he definitely liked it, and even gurgled or dang along which was lovely, and it was kind of nice to do it knowing I could be cawing like a crow and he wouldn't judge me hahah.

just sing to her! she doesn't care if you are tone deaf or not!

It can be soo much fun to sing to your child , choose to learn songs that have actions that are so much fun you both end up on the floor roaring with laughter,
Heads , shoulders , knees , and toes is a good one . Incy wincy spider also much fun for a toddler to learn .
You really don't have to be a good singer to enjoy songs with your child , once you get going you'll both love it .😄

You sound like a great mum, but if you really wanted to start singing to your baby, you could try easier songs like three blind mice, twinkle twinkle little star, baa baa black sheep etc and work up from there :)

Just say simple nursery rhymes but in a singsongy voice. No need to have tones of an opera singer!

Did it harm your development that your dad didn't sing to you ?

Is your baby's dad feeling guilty and worried about his lack of singing ?

They love singing. Doesn’t matter what you sing, anything at all is enjoyable for them.

I sometimes make up my own tunes and narrate what I’m doing to my baby. Simple things like “I’m going to the sink, gonna get you a drink, then I’ll come back, and we can have a snack”. Totally daft but it’s apparently entertaining when you’re a youngster!

Honestly I think worrying / anxiety about not singing is far more likely to have a negative impact than doing the singing! Reading is more important in my opinion

Another day and another way to feel a failure, I don't remember ever signing to my children, as fully functioning adults they now loudly protest if I sing along with the radio or break into random songs, neither of these has had the slightest affect on their lives

Really, really don't worry about it.

I think if you enjoy singing, then you should crack on and not worry about how you sound- your baby definitely won’t care. But if you don’t like singing or feel uncomfortable, then don’t. Your baby will be fine either way provided you talk to them and read to them.

I very much doubt you’re harming your baby’s development.

It is true that nursery rhymes are really powerful for their language and communication development though. All the actions, rhymes, repetition, alliteration etc are brilliant for them, but you could maybe say them in a sing song type voice instead, or look out for books and stories that have similar elements.

There’s also classes and groups - I really liked Bloom classes if you have them near you - lots of music but it’s loud enough that nobody can hear you singalong! Or just the church hall type groups, they usually either start or wrap up with a bit of signing and you can either mouth along quietly or quickly realise that everyone else is terrible too and stop worrying about it!

I do sing a lot to my now 2.5 year old and always have, and I do remember that amazing feeling when she suddenly started joining in or even singing away to herself whilst playing. I do also make sure to play lots of music around the house though too, in the hope that hearing people singing (or playing) actually in tune will counteract my awful example!

Honestly don't worry. You sound like you're doing fine.

There's no law that says you have to sing to your baby.

A bit of rhythm in the way you talk can be fun and enjoyable for them... like "we're going up the stairs now, bumpy bumpy bump" or playing peepo with repetitive language and funny voices... it's so similar to singing.

Plus you can get a lovely nursery rhymes cd to play in the car and then join in if you want to or not...

My dad was a terrible singer to the point where it was part of the fun when he sang and made us laugh!

His main song was repeating the words “go to sleep” over and over again to us. I’m sure your child will remember the fun of you singing more than the musical skill (or lack of). Give it a go! You’ll probably never have a less judgemental audience.