Feeling traumatised from my PND

[ChiquitayouandIKnow]

Developed PND with my second as they were a shocker of a sleeper, my first was very good. I have never been depressed before and the whole thing shocked me, particularly at how unwell I was. I was constantly crying and just wanted to kill myself. It was terrible. I got better through some therapy, but mainly because both children were sleeping through. It was all sleep. If I get decent sleep everything is right with the world.

the last couple of nights, both have been up for a couple of hours. I know it’s normal for sleep not to be linear but I find it so triggering. After two hours last night I just started shouting stop it stop it and burst into tears. I just can’t go back to that place where I felt so terrible and low.

I find the bad nights so triggering as I’m so scared of going back to that place.

has anyone been through this?

yes I was exactly the same. Still am. so totally get it. sleep is so important isn't it and when it's been so hard a poor night can easily be a trigger. I find reminding myself it's just one night, etc helps but in the moment that's super hard.

Yes me too. Only have 1 DD but both DP and me feel really quite traumatised by her not sleeping properly until 2.5 and now we both get pretty bad anxiety if she regresses or wakes in the night. I get really tearful and suicidal on little sleep too. Its a massive part of our decision to have one child because neither of us can bear the thought of going through that period of our lives again.