Help!! My 22 month old has gone feral

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Re-posting here for traffic...

DD has always been a demanding little soul, but just as we were getting into a nice routine of trips out, predictable lunch time nap etc everything has suddenly gone to shit!

It started with her sleep going to pot (teething/illness/me being away for a couple of days). So she went from self settling to wanting me to lie with her to get to sleep. This also means that when she stirs in the night she will scream until I come back and lie with her. She also struggles to settle for her nap now (although naps fine at nursery)

She's definitely had a developmental leap recently and has lots more language/understanding but she is now throwing almighty tantrums and getting very upset several times a day. Main battles are nappy change/getting dressed and leaving places. Tonight she screamed the house down and it was a two person job to force her into nappy/PJs against her will.

Any ideas on what's going on/whether this is normal 22 month old behaviour? Any tips on how to manage this would be appreciated. All my previous strategies of distraction/giving two choices etc are now useless in the face of this little ball of rage! (She is also very funny and sweet but is driving me mad!)

I could have written this for my 25 month old! Used to go to sleep on his own then was poorly over Christmas and he’s shifted. Now I have to sit next to his bed until he sleeps. Stirs most nights and I have to go in a sit with him til he drifts back off again. And nursery, like yours, must be going to sleep on his own. His naps at home are actually ok and he’ll allow me to leave the room and he will fall asleep.

Also hates putting on anything over his head and will kick, run away as much as he can. I read somewhere that they can get a bit of a sensory overload. Another thing I read is that they could be getting a bit frustrated as they have these huge feelings but might not be able to articulate them. I’ve tried identifying/labelling his feelings by saying ‘I think you’re feeling tired, angry, annoyed etc.’ and then cuddles.

I’m putting it down as another phase and just trying to be reassuring to him and trust he’ll come out the other side.

So sorry, no real advice, but moral support lol.

@BeaKind Thanks for replying and sorry to hear you're going through the same! It's crazy how they can just change overnight. The nappy/clothing thing is really getting me down as I'm having to resort to pinning her down while she screams and then tries to rip the clothes off again! I've been doing similar, trying to name the feeling, stay calm and give a choice of two options to prevent tantrums but I'm not having much success! Now I'm starting to wonder if my approach has been too gentle and she knows she can give me the run around! Hope things improve for you soon!

Yes! Been trying the options thing too but not working for us either. Sometimes he just says no to all options 😂

Hope the same for you too!

Mines the same. Nappy change and getting dressed is a nightmare. Sleep
Times can be a bit of a battle too.

I survived the tantrum stage by kneeling down with DS and just cuddling him until he calmed down. Then we spoke about feelings to help him learn how to articulate. Doesn't work for all children, but worth a try. Keep on with the choice offering, obviously there are some things that are none negotiable, so just be consistent. It was about 2 1/2 years old I introduced the naughty step which also worked for us, but again not for every child.
I'd also look to get a regular sleep routine again. A very rigid routine works wonders.

@iloveyankeecandle & @DelilahBucket thanks for your replies! I've tried cuddling her but this just seems to make her more angry unfortunately! Totally agree about routine...I can't help thinking the sleep issues are causing some of the other behaviours, but not sure how to fix it! DD currently still has a nap (after some persuasion) around 1-2pm for an hour and then sleeps from around 7.45pm to 6.30am (with a wake up around 4am). She seems generally quite tired and grouchy!