Child Maintenance

[whaisahumantodo]

Am I the only one who thinks the system is totally broken?

I have twins - still in nappies - childcare bill of £2k per month and then obviously food on top. I get £40 a week from their dad which I know is more than most

To be honest I think If a self employed parent is fiddling the books not to pay then he shouldn't have any rights to see the child(ren)

I also think if a parent is insisting on 50/50 to avoid CMS then there should be a legal right to recover half the expenses - current system means my twins dad could have them half the week but I'd still be expected to pick up the full childcare bill and not receive CMS

For me it’s not worth it, my ex is on the sick long term unemployed. He will never work and by the time my children are 18 I’ve worked out he will only be in £4000 worth of arrears (that’s over 13 years) it’s pittance and we can manage without it so it’s not worth keeping open.

But your childcare bill would be less because he has them half the time?

He would be at work. It’s disgustingly common that women foot the full bill for childcare whilst having 50/50. They can’t be forced to pay it, and if you don’t, you lose your childcare

@NoShepardWithoutVakarian it's a joke. Should get a court order to say he is responsible in his time.

For the receiving parent it's broken - not many get anything at all.
Or it drives the NRP to seek more custody or 50% of a child just to avoid paying. Thus forcing the child into a balance of parents that doesn't serve them well.

For the paying parent - if it's a parent who actually gives a shit the receiving parent deliberately withholds contact to increase the amount they get. It also doesn't take into consideration what the receiving parent earns. They could be earning twice the paging parent and CMS would give a hoot.

It just doesn't work.

Separated parents should be forced to court if they can't agree to get a judge to decide a suitable amount to contribute.

Yes it's completely broken. It should be a priority for any Government surely to sort it out. How many children could we lift out of poverty if their dad only paid for them?

We should get really tough - it's one of the things the US does well.

And before the MRA on the thread comes back at me - I'm still married to the father of my DS and have no skin in the game.

Given successive ones didn’t even make it a priority when the bulk of the money owed was owed to them they’re never going to do it for the sake of the children.

I mean, the fact that they said “ there is far too much money owed to the Sec of State. We must do something!”… and then came up with the solution of “let the parent on benefits keep it all” rather than any collection method changes says it all.

My children's dad is self employed and has said he doesn't have to pay them on weeks he doesn't work..but then I've had other people say that he still should pay as he knows when one jobs starts and finishes and the next one starts..does anyone know if he should be paying or not

My DP pays his ex a set amount agreed every month without fail, yet every month his ex still asks for him to go half on anything she buys for the child. What is he paying for, her bills?

It shouldn't even be considered a " system " . I

What they also ask for half the shopping, half the childcare, half the dentist, half of school trips, half of all clothes and uniform/shoes, half pocket money, half haircuts, half holidays, half of clubs, half of days out etc? Your DP must be soooo busy with all the admin of paying half of everything that I'm surprised they'd have time to work to pay for their half. Poor lamb.

@ZoneOut24 but what is the original set amount going on? Don't mind but some people do genuinely use it as money grabbing

I've no idea quite what your maths is trying to prove but I'm sure it makes sense in your head. Of course you must be very clever to use a mathematical term like delta on MN, ooooh! 👏
However my set bills will be very different depending on if I'm the primary carer for dc or not. Something you've failed to take account of in your "calculations". My income may also be different:

1. I may have to work less hours due to having dc more and needing to, you know, look after them (well you may not know but try to imagine).
2. I earn less because I've had to take a more flexible job to fit in around dc which pays less per hour.
3. I may have taken a step back in my career whilst having children (fyi that's giving birth, something to date women generally do) and allowing the father to continue FT in their career, climbing the ladder.

So maybe your simple maths should be a little more realistic, rather than la la land.