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Parenting
17yr old niece babysitting- is it too much?
LaylaSimmonds · 18/03/2023 10:21
Hi all, myself and my husband are away for the night next week for a work event of his and my niece is babysitting my 2yr and 3yr old sons. She has looked after them before in the day for a couple of hours but never overnight. She is going to come round this week and help me put them to bed so that she knows their routine and where things are (nappies, bottles etc). She will be looking after them from 2pm till about midday the next day. DH is a bit worried that it might be too much for her but she’s great with them and I told DH she could have kids of her own at this age, I am paying her for doing it as well. Do you think this is too much for her?
I did right front and back on the nappies for her as last time she was putting them on backwards not that it mattered
Isyesterdaytomorrowtoday · 18/03/2023 10:23
Do they both sleep through reliably? Is there an adultier adult nearby she could call to help if she felt out of her depth? Do you trust that she’d make that call if unsure?
MichelleScarn · 18/03/2023 10:24
Isyesterdaytomorrowtoday · 18/03/2023 10:23
Do they both sleep through reliably? Is there an adultier adult nearby she could call to help if she felt out of her depth? Do you trust that she’d make that call if unsure?
This, and how much are you paying her?
EmCole99 · 18/03/2023 10:26
I would just make sure that you show her where everything is and how to look at the baby monitor etc. I think as well leave her a piece of paper with all the important numbers on, at that age I think they are responsible to make judgements etc
Banjowaster · 18/03/2023 10:28
Jeez I regularly looked after a 9yo, a 7yo and a 2yo as a 14 year old babysitter!!
Trust your instincts and make sure she knows she can call you and you won't be mad.
LaylaSimmonds · 18/03/2023 10:31
Isyesterdaytomorrowtoday · 18/03/2023 10:23
Do they both sleep through reliably? Is there an adultier adult nearby she could call to help if she felt out of her depth? Do you trust that she’d make that call if unsure?
They both sleep absolutely fine in the night, my 2yr old sometimes struggles to settle and we did wean him off the bottles but I will get her to give him one just to make sure. My sister lives only 10/15 minutes away and would be more than happy to come over if she was struggling. 100% I trust her to make that call. I am paying her £85 to do it
Isyesterdaytomorrowtoday · 18/03/2023 10:35
In that case I’d be happy to - total bargain on the babysitting too, we pay ours (although a little older) £150ish for those kind of hours. Hopefully it all goes smoothly!
caringcarer · 18/03/2023 10:38
If she knows the children well and is coming over to see their bed time routine this week I'm sure she will be fine. At 17 as you say she could have a child of her own. Good your sister is close by too.
Snowontheblow · 18/03/2023 10:39
I told DH she could have kids of her own at this age she would only have a 3 year old if she'd conceived at 13 or 14, so I don't think this is the line of argument you want to go down.
I think you are underpaying her, and I would want to be 100% sure she really would call her mum if she's worried about anything.
WandaWonder · 18/03/2023 10:41
She probably would be fine but I also don't get the 'she could have a child at her age' argument
Nimbostratus100 · 18/03/2023 10:41
I think it sound fine, but I agree, a little present as well as the money, and a gorgeous dinner all ready for her
GonnaGetGoingReturns · 18/03/2023 10:42
At 15 onwards I was babysitting and childminding occasionally for a 2-3 year old and his baby brother. I was fine but my DM lived nearby.
You should pay her a bit more though. Would be nice to get her a takeaway and 1-2 alcoholic (or non) drinks too as well as supply snacks.
ShirleyPhallus · 18/03/2023 10:44
I disagree really, I think this is a big ask for a 17 year old! A 2 and a 3 year old can be a real handful, especially her getting them to bed and getting them up in the morning and they play up.
as an aside, if you do go down this route, get some pull ups instead of nappies as they’ll be easier for her to use
GonnaGetGoingReturns · 18/03/2023 10:45
One thing I would say, if one of the children is eg teething then ensure she knows what to do, I recall putting Bonjela on the baby myself and also if they’re sniffly how to give eg Calpol. Get her to listen out for baby monitor and go upstairs to check on them.
Marblessolveeverything · 18/03/2023 10:45
Honestly I wouldn't it's a lot of responsibility and the overnight aspect is tough on a not yet adult without children.
If it was one older child then yes or you were going to be home at the end of the night, fine.
Money wise I would have thought at least 150.
GonnaGetGoingReturns · 18/03/2023 10:48
Re morning routine, would your sister come over first thing as agreed with @ShirleyPhallus that this might be hard work, but it’s certainly not that hard. I’d prefer your sister to be there so your niece can grab a shower, get dressed and get her own breakfast.
2bazookas · 18/03/2023 10:49
Is there a local mother you trust, who would be willing to be DN's backup if she needs it? That would require the LM being at home to accept a phone call and come if required.
If she's a sensible girl and your children are straight forward to feed and put to bed (and reliable sleepers) I'm sure she'll be fine.
Lovelyveg82 · 18/03/2023 10:50
, I am paying her for doing it as well.
well that’s big of you! 😂
YetMoreNewBeginnings · 18/03/2023 10:58
It totally depends on the 17yo
My DD1 had a regular babysitting round from 14. By the time she was 17 several people wouldn’t have batted an eyelid at that kind of responsibility for her.
my DD2 however I would have thought twice about leaving herself, let alone with two children.
If she’s an experienced babysitter, very useful to children and is realistic about it then she’ll be absolutely fine.
I hope that £85 is on top of full fridge access and lots of treats as that’s a bargain for 22 hours babysitting!!
FourTeaFallOut · 18/03/2023 11:01
The fact that you are having to show her how to put a nappy on properly doesn't scream experienced babysitter or teen who grew up with lots of younger siblings. It sounds like a complete rookie thrown in at the deep end.
MoreSleepPleasee · 18/03/2023 11:09
I had a baby at 17 and think you are being very unreasonable leaving 2 toddlers with a 17 year old.
Girliefriendlikespuppies · 18/03/2023 11:18
I have a 17yo and I think it's a big ask, I also wouldn't want to leave my v young children with a teenager as it would just worry me too much.
I imagine it will be fine as long as everything goes okay and there's no unseen issues like one of the kids is ill or hurts themselves.
Is there a reason they can't just go to their auntys house for the night?
Seeline · 18/03/2023 11:25
Is she used to being in her own overnight?
Have you gone over fire escape plans with two sleepy toddlers etc?
Does she know how/when to give Calpol etc?
And I would not be leaving alcohol for her whilst in charge of toddlers overnight!!
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