If you thought your summer born seemed ready for school

[Sometherusername]

Were they really? Or did they have problems in reception or later down the line?

DD is August born. We've considered deferring her reception place but pretty much dismissed it as she is (so far - she's only 2.5) hitting milestones on time/early, is relatively confident, and has been at nursery from 11 months and loves it.

Any thoughts? I know that statistically she'll be disadvantaged from starting school so young.

Oh and she did her SATs last year and was ‘greater depth’ across the board.

I was youngest in my school year, I had a friend whose birthday was the next day but a year older. Absolutely never an issue for me, only potential problem was I was the last to learn to drive and legally buy alcohol.
My eldest is an early September birthday, she absolutely was ready a year before and it felt like she was held back by having to stay in nursery. It still seemed like she was a lot more mature than her peers when she started uni but that could be personality.

I’m in Scotland so my children effectively did another year of preschool and then went into P1 with that cohort. Their nursery was brilliant and did different topic lead activities so it wasn’t just a repeat of the year. My DC had had issues with hearing so phonics was a no go at that stage… had a year of speech and language during that extra pre school year and it made a big difference as could differentiate between sounds by beginning of school. Now I see the benefit of being older as a teenager … my younger one we just deferred as wanted to do the same for them both and again am glad they are older as a teenager. So hard to know what’s for the best- parenting seems to be full of unknowns and best guesses!

We were concerned about DS (August) but half his class is summer born and he's done really well, now year 3. Not saying there weren't challenges e.g took handwriting a while to get established but he caught up by the end of reception.

I have two DDs born at either end of the school year.

DD1 - August birthday. We didn't defer. In school nursery she seemed really bright, independent from a young age and exceeding all expectations for her age. Socially a bit more reserved. Y1 was a huge leap for her from reception. Moved into Y2 unable to write a sentence, still very much on the reception age books. Physically small, took longer to learn to ride a bike, catch a ball etc. School said she'll catch up. She didn't. I taught her to read, realised she was dyslexic and had her diagnosed. Now Y5 she's keeping up academically but emotionally very sensitive, lacks confidence and has low self esteem. Going on camp next week and very anxious. Physically there is a big difference between her and her friends who are a year older. Often says she hates school.

DD2 - October born. Really wanted to be at school. Was already reading and counting before Reception. She rode a bike with no training wheels at 3. Has bags of confidence. Everything comes easy to her. Enjoys homework but bored at school. However loves school.

Would have kept DD1 back.

11+ does take account of chronological age & gives a weighting for it so she will need to score higher if deferred than if not, to receive the same ‘outcome’. However a whole year older it would be silly not to expect that!

I’m aware I sound like I’m arguing for deferring. I’m really not - we didn’t choose it for our own dd and I wouldn’t again. I do know that even in all these ‘absolutely fine, totally ready for school’ summer borns it usually is evident to one extent or another as a teacher though. It’s just often easier for us as parents to hope / assume it isn’t! And I wish it was more common here like it is in Scotland and Australia because I think it would be better for everyone.

Our 'last week of August' baby was more than ready, possibly helped by having been at nursery since he was about 8 months old as I worked ft. He started school a week after his 4th birthday. It didn't hold him back at all (he's now at Cambridge) and I can't imagine that he'd have done any better had we deferred. But every child is different and I only know about my own, so people will obviously have had different experiences.

I personally don't think it makes any difference - but I remember that when my DS did the Eton Test in Yr 6, candidates took it at different times of year, depending on their birth month. So my DS - whose birthday is in July - took the test with other boys with birthdays which fall later in the school year. So the school obviously thinks that it can make a difference. My other DC's schools didn't take it into account.

Yes

There is a difference between Delayed and Deferred start:

A delayed entry is when your child starts school the academic year following their fifth birthday. A deferred entry is when they start school during their normal academic year group, but at a later date. You may be able to talk with your school about a staggered or phased entry

There is a ton of research regarding outcomes for summer born children. There will always be children who do really well. Statistically summer borns generally do struggle to catch up. Google it.

However - listen to your child, not strangers on the internet. You know her best. If you feel she's ready, send her in reception. Legally children have to be in reception the term after they turn 5.

Also consider it's not just academics, it's the social side. I delayed my summer born premmie to start in Reception aged 5 as he wasn't emotionally ready. Best decision for him, he's in the year he should have been born into. He's also not the oldest in his year. What always came back to me was, 'do I want him to cope or thrive?'

Final thought - if her birthday was 1st September would you be rushing to send her to school early? Probably not...

DS born in July has turned out to be pretty bright (YR6) but he was quite slow to read compared to DD born October who now (Yr3) is not as bright as DS generally but was reading at a much higher level much earlier.

So that's my observed experience - make of it what you will

My DD is now 12. Her birthday is august 7th. She was really clingy as a toddler but I was desperate to get some time to myself when it came to her starting school so I probably wouldn't have entertained her being kept back.

With hindsight I think it would have been better if she'd gone a year later. Her female peers just seemed much more mature than her. Although she was more mature than than many of the boys.

She had a horrible yr 7 and I've now moved her to a small private school.

I had cancer when she was 11 months and couldn't care for her properly fur a few months. I think this also had a big impact on her ability to cope

My summer born DS struggled a bit initially in reception ( mostly with sitting still), caught up by the end of reception and is now the only boy in his year 6 class to get a grammar school place.
Conversely my September born DD was bored the last few months at nursery.

DD August born. For context did 2 years of quite structured pre-school (we were living in China) for 3 hours per day and then UK curriculum school. Reception was a little wobbly socially- she struggled to transition from playing with whoever was there to making friendships and seeking people out in the playground. From Year 1 she was completely fine. Now Year 6 - when we moved back we considered deferring her, just because it was then or never, and were advised against it by the school who felt she was in the "right year", both socially and academically.

She has older siblings, which may make a difference socially- I'm not sure.

My two summer borns have done great, it has actually worked in their favour as they have had older kids to strive towards and stretch them. In contrast my niece is a September born, fairly bright for her age (but not unusually so) and really bored in school as she can do most things easily. I think being in a nursery setting prior to preschool/reception really helps them too. I'd be more concerned about them being really socially and in terms of their own independence than anything academic.

@Sometherusername DD seemed very confident as a toddler. She was loud and chatty. She was also desperate to join her older sister at school. By the time she was in y5, the anxiety started to show, in that she was panic stricken about going on a residential school trip, even though it was really fun and exactly what she liked doing. The rest of the time the anxiety was not that obvious.

The anxiety really stuck in y10. She has about 2 weeks off school feeling really unwell. She had countless tests and medical examinations. No issues were found so eventually it was put down to anxiety.

From then on, she became a regular customer of the school counsellor until she left at the end of the 6th form. Her mental health was always rather poor.

She is 18 and doing a gap year now. She is generally much happier. I would say that when she was in the 6th form she was emotionally like a 14 year-old. Now she is more like a 16-year-old. I suppose some
People just need longer to grow up.

I think it's particularly tough socially for younger boys once they hit high school and puberty strikes, no matter how well they do academically. Being a year younger makes a big difference physically when you're a 14 year old boy.

I have deferred my son - end of June birth.
he starts school this September rather than with his correct year group in 2022. So far, no regrets at all - he’s visibly more mature and confident than he was last year, and I hope, will have a better time at school as a result.