Can't comfort my baby?

[Crimblecrumble1990]

Hi,

Wondering if anyone else has had the same experience and can offer any words of wisdom?

My baby boy (4 months) can't stand to be cuddled / rocked as comfort or in the effort to get him to sleep.

It's not like he will happily fall asleep feeding or whatever we will be doing. You need to actively help him sleep regularly otherwise he will fight it to the bitter end red eyed and miserable.

I want to be able to comfort / rock / sing to sleep etc, I want to make a rod for my own back but he just won't have any of it! He's crying because he's tired so I attempt to help him sleep and his crying just increases to screaming.

He will sleep happily in the pram (no tears) and I just have to leave him crying in the cot and he will fall asleep in there too. But the pram isn't practical - I have an older child to look after and I really don't feel great about him crying himself to sleep in his cot.

Everything I read on here is either 'oh I couldn't possibly let my child cry, I have to pick him up'. Whereas when I pick my child up, he cries harder.

Or it's 'second babies just need to sleep when/however they can and fit in with your lives'. But he really does need a lot of sleep otherwise he's so so miserable and he will fight it and has never fallen asleep by himself in the baby swing etc.

He is breastfed and detests the sling too.

I'm struggling to find anyone who can relate and feel a bit like I'm going mad/my baby hates me. If anyone has had the same experience, please let me know :)

If crying himself to sleep in the cot results in the least crying and distress then it’s the right thing to do.

4 month olds are notoriously bad at naps aren't they. Mines the same.
He used to contact nap until he hit 4 months and now screams when I try and hold him to sleep. I trick him 😂 when he wakes up from his really long 30 minute nap, still kind of drowsy I scoop him up and try and contact nap him then. it works quite often and I pretend he loves me in those moments. (Plus sometimes he will end up with a mega 45 minute nap because the contact extends the nap by 15 minutes)
No advice on initially getting a 4 month old to sleep. I end up in a Mexican stand off of sleep with mine multiple times a day.

DD is 5 months and some naps she's like that. She gets herself in a tizz, gets overtired and I can't comfort her because it makes her worse. When she's like that I put her in her napper and she falls asleep after a minute or 2 of crying.

Hi, I know this is a while back but did this get any better? This is exactly how I feel. My baby doesn’t seem to want to sleep anywhere, most of all not on me & it’s breaking my heart. I feel like the worst mum ever!

I can't even remember writing this post so it definitely did get better! I'm not going to lie it was rough - my mat leave nearly broke me and I never really did find anyone who could relate to how bad he was for so long. He's still super independent and pretty feisty but with each stage - walking/talking it is getting better and better. Congratulations on your baby :)