Can't work out what's wrong. Please please help.

[Gimli]

We've fed, winded, changed... but DS (9 weeks) is just so unhappy and has been so since thursday. He's never been easy - always been a terrible sleeper (only sleeps when laying onone of us, we have to sleep in shifts) and while DW is trying to bf, he's not been latching on. Any ideas. He had been much happier the week or so before this, even flashing the odd wonderful smile.

Also do you remember that you are nine weeks into this parenting lark, which means you are sodden with exhaustion and worry.

It gets better

when my ds got overtired at this age I used to pop him in his car seat and plonk him next to the extractor fan in the kitchen. The white noise seemed to help him chill out and fall asleep (that and it drowned out the screaming!!!). might be worth a try!

That's a good idea. We have no fan, but desparately trying to move, and will file the idea away for when we finally get out of here.
The exhaustion is a killer...

It's really freaky having him sleep like this. Any idea over how long he can be left in the carry cot?

Make the most of it he can stay there till he wakes - or you give in and wake him

Leave him alone! if he hasn't been sleeping properly he is probably just catching up. Warn DW that he will probably be mega hungry when he wakes though.

Every few days my DD's did this, crying, inconsolable, not sleeping, then they would have a mega sleep and it would put them back on track.

Also it might be teething. Teething is possible this early, it doesn't mean that teeth will appear soon though! Is he drooly? biting on the bottle or nipple? If he is then see if you can find some teething powders as they are homeopathic(sp?) so no damage if it isn't that and it works if it is. (only some are suitable for under 6 m,onths so you would need to check)

just another thought - have you tried carrying him around in a sling? if he likes sleeping on top of you he might like sleeping in a sling. if he gets more sleep it might make him more settled generally.

Don't think its teething - no sign of anything when he's yawned (or howled).

Am going to leave him. I the pram next to me so I can hear him breathing.

Dw uses a sling, but can only manage short times because it hurts her back. For that reason I haven't tried (existing back problem, compounded by recent car smash).
DS seems to like it tho. We are getting one of those hammock things to try him in that at nights. He has a lovely cot, and a moses basket, which he just won't use, sadly.

i have one of the hammock things too - an amby nature's nest. they are good, so hope that helps your ds

It could be teething even if you can't see anything, the teeth move around before coming near the gums. Is he drooling, chewing on things or biting? If he is then it could be his teeth.

What sort of sling do you have? I have a curve spine and the top of my back is very painful but for long carries I can use a wrap that crosses in the lower part of my back...lots of sling wearers on here so we might be abel to help you find one that doesn't hurt!

And he will sleep in his cot at some point, and you will forget about what an exhausting time this is, and then when you have your second it will all come screaming back to you!

A ring sling. DW has had another delivered, but it looks complicated and neither of us is good at putting things together/following manuals (me especially . Even worse now seriously sleep deprived. She's found the ring sling better since going to see someone about it, and positioning the rings lower down, but I don't think its ideal.

God having another... We sometimes talk about it but at the moment it instills real fear!

DS still sleeping, i'm not going to wake him, but this feels really weird.

Still sleeping? If he is, why aren't you!
It does feel weird and I am sure that a lot of people will agree that the first time a DC sleeps for any length of time you have to check on them every few minutes!

One that goes over both shoulders might be easier for her to use for a longer period of time.
Have a perusal of this. It shows some of the ways to carry a baby with a long strip of cloth with good pictures to help if you are instructionally challenged (I am too!)
Ringslings are great, and one of my fave carriers, but they do start to ache after awhile so are not good for long carries which is what it sounds like you need, as they sort of pull you to one side and affect your posture.

Now, go and get some kip yourself!

Just woken up - ravenous. Being cute for the first time since thurs tho, which is nice.

I'm used to not sleeping until the small hours - he sleeps on me until 1am/2am, then sleeps on Dw. She gets some sleep with him on but I daren't...

Gimli, re the sling have a look at little possums, can't remember the actual site address so will have to google it, they have photo instructions of people actually putting the slings on and oputting babies in them.
Sounds to me (but I'm no expert) that yopur lo has had a bit of a cold, this would stop him latching on properly. If nappies are still wet etc then you don't need to worry too much. Your DW has done very well to bf if he has tongue tie, can make it incredibly painful for mum.
Hope you have a better day today.

Thanks, those photos are great.
He's woken up in a much happier mood this am and is feeding well. He slept well and so did we for the first time in days. We suspect that he as over tired, afer hardly any sleep.

Hey Gimli, how's it going?
I bet he's much happier now he has slept a bit!

Hi
So much better after some decent sleep.... Was lovely for a couple of days, but been screaming at top vol for two hours straight tonight. Ho hum.

Both my two were like this. We found the only thing that stopped the crying was a hairdryer!! On cool and we were in the room too.

If its colic, try a cranial osteopath, we were desperate, midwife suggested it so we gave it a go and found it amazing, both DS's were different babies after having a few sessions. Am pregnant with no 3 and seriously considering booking the osteopath now for a few weeks after the birth, just in case we get a 3rd colicky baby.

Sleep deprivation is awful when you are going thru it, a form of torture!

Could it be reflux. Our Lo now 9 mths has been unsettled since birth up and down all the time and is on meds for reflux, so dont just assume its colic. Take to GP if continues and ask for referral to Paediatrician.

Could it be reflux. Our Lo now 9 mths has been unsettled since birth up and down all the time and is on meds for reflux, so dont just assume its colic. Take to GP if continues and ask for referral to Paediatrician.

DW going to see GP with DS tomorrow, so will ask, good thought. We have white noise on at the moment, and he's calmer. It's horrible when they're screaming like that and there is nothing you can do.

Poor you two, Gimli. Let us know how it goes at the doc. There is nothing worse than the early days with number one when you don't know what to do for the best, nothing seems to work, and you're exhausted too.
My DD had many tricky days with apparently no reason when she was brand new. I kept trying to feed her and she wouldn't eat or settle and then eventually it occurred to me (thank you, Baby Whisperer) that she might just be overtired and overstimulated so I worked on keeping her very quiet and calm for a few days and used to her Moses basket and it worked a treat - she sort of put herself into a rhythm/cycle of eating roughly every three hours, then a tiny bit of 'activity' (nappy change!) and having a good sleep in between. To this day (18 months) she is a complete angel unless she's overtired and then it's meltdown time... Every baby is so different - just don't get into the trap of thinking your DS 'should' be doing anything.

Thanks. He's having a tough time (so we are too). Worryingly he's not putting much weight on. The Doc who we like a lot (the hv we really don't)thinks he may have had a cold and has given us some nasal drops.
We think over stimulation is a prob and our open plan flat is a bit of a disaster for him (urgently trying to move) because it makes it very hard to cut him off from stimulation. Fortunately DW has found a sling with lots of padding that he really seems to like. Being in it calms him and also cuts him off from some of the stimulation.
If we could just persuade him to sleep somewhere other than on top of one of us we'd be much happier! We're going to try a hammock. He refuses point blank to sleep in the moses basket.