Sharing baby clothes

[Antsinmypants23]

Is it horrible of me to not want to share my baby clothes with my sister in law?
I know from being a regular poster here in the past that baby clothes sharing causes a debate, so I don’t want to come across rude, tight or inconsiderate by expressing this annoyance.

We are due almost 3 months apart so naturally clothes that my baby grows out of could be handed down to my sister in law to reuse for her baby. I’m almost certain I’d like us to have another baby with a close age gap, as I’m getting no younger and have teens already so I want to be finished before I’m 40. I don’t want the hassle of chasing up clothes my niece or nephew has outgrown to keep aside for another baby.
My sister in law thinks it will be an easy way to get free clothes and not have to buy any of her own, it’s almost been decided as a definite without even asking me or my husband first. My mother in law told me it would be a good idea and she has promised them to my sister in law. So I believe it wasn’t my sister in law asking but my mother in law suggesting it.
Perhaps I’m being precious as they are only clothes but it has irritated me. They know we have a large order on the way of neutral unisex baby clothes from various shops.
Did you share your baby clothes? Did you get back them in good Nick/ever see them again? How do I politely refuse vs. suck it up and not let it annoy me?

I would only pass on anything that you won't mind getting back.

However, you might be saved any hassle as babies come in different shapes and sizes!

My DD was very skinny but very long when she was born. 'Newborn' size Babygros from Jojo and similar wide baby brands just didn't fit her when she was born as the legs weren't long enough. Then her width caught up with her height but she then barely grew so she was still wearing 0–3 months size at 6 months old. She's now nearly 6 years old and still happily wearing some age 3–4 clothes!

The chances of you being finished with stuff in time for a baby 3 months younger to get use out of it is slim! Things like dresses, shorts, tops, jumpers and coats will often fit for months (and sometimes years!) beyond the age on the label.

Only pass on what you do not want back.
Because you wont get them back
Her baby may be bigger r than yours so might be the other way round
You may get given things you dont want to keep.
So just say you will pass on anything you do not need but no promises. She cannot rely on you for every item of clothing. She can buy packs of sleepsuits from asda cheap.

Cheeky. I’m all for sharing clothing, it sickens me the amount of baby clothes in existence. But she should be splitting the cost with you if she is literally planning on using your DCs entire wardrobe at 3 monthly intervals.

Nope, didn't share when I had relatives with a 5 month younger gap (no expectation to either). Way too tricky to keep track of.

It's really helpful to be able to share bigger 'kit' type items that have such a short shelf life (e.g. bouncers) but clothing bundles are cheap and easy to buy on Marketplace, Vinted etc. it'll be easy and cheap for your sister in law to set herself up with clothes.

Agree with the previous posters of giving a bright and breezy 'no' without opening it up for further discussion.

Ignore the MIL 😒 I'm all for passing on clothes - have recently returned some I borrowed from a friend for my DC1, and topped it up with some new ones too as a thank you (I kept a list of what we borrowed so could return it all but I like a good list).

But in your case - I think the age gap won't make it feasible. Send SIL the invoice for half of your imminent large order, or send her the links to buy her own.

Or when your baby has outgrown their clothes, sort them into ones to keep and ones to lend and only send the really well worn and tired ones 😆

4 kids 3 still babes I had no problem giving to my sister in law when she had hers last month. First I know it helps alot as she can't work, second I don't mind getting more haha tho that's usually when hubby hides his wallet🤣 I kept specific things that meant something and let the rest go and got more for next baby lol

Honestly, don't bother. You'll have way too much stuff and probably be glad to pass some of it on. There will be stuff you're given that you'd never put on any baby. People gave us loads of outfits and I only dressed my baby in sleepsuits. You'll likely have people trying to pass on sackfuls of stuff to you.

3 months is too close an age gap for this to be practical anyway. She’ll likely need the next size up before you’re done with it especially after 6 months when the sizes increase. Even making a massive presumption that you’ll both have average sized babies of the same sex, your 9 month old will still very much be in their 6-12 months clothes when her 6 month old outgrows their 3-6 month stuff. Newborn sizes are unpredictable too, some babies go straight into 0-3 and others are in newborn for ages. Even if you were willing to give her hand me downs, it’s just not realistic for her to count on it! And that’s not to mention that you want to keep it for the next baby. Just say no!

Honestly baby clothes back up so fast it’s a joke. You end up being pleased to pass them on. Keep the bits you feel are precious and will want to reuse, pass on other bits. By the time you’re weaning a lot of stuff gets grubby too quickly to pass on. Then they are in clothes for 6months /a year at a time so it won’t be appropriate to pass on.

just let it play out. Youll soon see it’s a non issue.

'Sorry SIL I'm not sure where this idea of sharing clothes came from, but we're going to be keeping DC1s clothes ready for when we decide to plan DC2. Will of course pass things on when we're done having our own DC'

If MIL says anything, say the same and endure your DH is on the same page.

It’s impractical. I would buy only the basics until after baby gets here. DD came early and was in newborn until 8 weeks and didn’t go into 0-3 until 3 months. DS didn’t fit into newborn or 0-1 when he was born and went straight into 0-3. At 6 week he was 3-6 months.

What happens if your SIL’s baby is born and your baby is still in newborn or 0-1? Does her baby go naked because she hasn’t bought any clothes?

I gave my unisex baby clothes to SIL and she gave them away so I couldn’t have them back when I got pregnant 6 months later!

just pass on any clothing gifts that aren’t your taste and keep the things you like :)