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Original poster

Potty training help needed 3.5

7 replies

Jojoba1979 · 21/02/2023 08:05

My youngest daughter is 3yr 6mths…and I can not get her on a potty even just to sit on it let alone use it. When she was 2 she showed real interest and went on it once or twice, but then stopped and due to her getting viruses never really showed interest again. I have her in pull ups she tells me when she has pooped after she has done it, doesn’t tell me when she has wee’d I have tried everything a mini toilet, various potty’s in the cartoon she will like, a toilet seat a portable potty. I have had her undressed for the whole day and she carried to have pull up back on to the point she was screaming if I tried to say she just needed potty, I have little knickers tried reward charts/books/videos/songs…absolutely nothing is working. I don’t want to put any pressure on her. But the nursery she will be starting after Easter won’t change a pull up. Any tips would be grateful xxx

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

OakTreex · 21/02/2023 08:20

To be honest, I think too often we mistake signs of readiness for a child happily and willingly begging to be toilet trained - many children won't show a huge interest but it doesn't mean they're not ready! Many need a gentle push towards it when they're showing other signs of readiness.

Unless your DD is neurodiverse (or suspected to be) she has likely been ready for some time.

I know you don't want to 'put pressure' on her but in my opinion you do actually need to quite firmly encourage this at this point especially as she's going to a nursery that require her to be trained.

When she doesn't want to go to the potty, what do you do? I would sit mine on the potty myself, gently hold them on there and encourage them regardless of some pushback and tears. Of course they don't want to do it - it's new and a bit scary and they're comfortable in nappies.

I think you need to pick a week, get rid of the pull ups, put her in pants and do not go back again. Pull ups only for night time and persist. She'll get it but you might need to be firm.

Shemovesshemoves21 · 21/02/2023 08:29

How is her communication? If she communicates well and understands simple instructions (and not ND) then I'm afraid I'd be getting a little firmer with her, especially given staff wont be changing her when she starts preschool. Explain that it's time she starts using the potty/toilet and the pull ups are being put away (in the bin!). Find a week where you have nothing going on and go in full force. No pull ups, ready to clean up messes and most importantly trying to make it as fun for her as possible. Talk to her about it in the run up so she knows what to expect and hype up the sticker charts, let her pick out new knickers, a book she can read whilst on the loo (which may help her stay put). I had a jar full of smarties and every time we had a successful potty trip, a smartie and sticker would be the reward, as well as lots of over the top praise.

mybunniesandme · 21/02/2023 08:29

Have you tried just a toddler seat insert for the proper toilet? My daughter hated potty's and we just went with it with the big loo

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THATissoooFETCH · 21/02/2023 08:31

Op i have no advice but in a pretty similar position with our DS. We made the decision to hold off on school nursery until September for this reason.

Woopdee · 21/02/2023 08:36

Sounds like you've tried a lot of stuff! Have you tried just being really relaxed about it all. Pop her in some knickers and normal trousers, tell her wees and poos go in the toilet now. Any accidents just "Oh dear let's try not to do that again, we'll go to the toilet next time" all happy and cheery and she might just click that this is the way it is now.

Fridaysgirl17 · 21/02/2023 08:44

My son was like this,he was showing great interest but then due to family issues, death of beloved gran & his dad left in not so amicable circumstances,he reverted back but after a few weeks I had to get back on it,I got him potty books,a sticker chart,he picked something he wanted once his chart was full,I got him the character potty he wanted,& a kids seat for the toilet as he found it frightening as it was so big. I just took away the pull ups during the day & we went to the toilet many times just to get him used to it,we had accidents & I talked him through them, it's ok etc,we can try again. I had to be firm & praise him so much once he did it,high fives,claps,best boy,he'd get to pop his stickers on& loved it. We got there & he's 5 now & completely dry,day & night. It's hard & can be stressful but sticking with it will get it done,I felt it was impossible at one stage but he's great now 😂

SnapBang · 21/02/2023 11:29

Mine didn’t use the potty - straight to the big loo. Just get up tomorrow and tell her it’s no more pull ups. Put them in the bin together. Put the knickers on her and explain what’s happening, be very clear and firm. Take her to the big loo lots and lots of times, just sit her on it. If she goes in her knickers, be firm and tell her that’s not what you want and it’s smelly and change her. Give her a sticker when she goes on the loo. She will be fine!

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