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Original poster

Advice with bedwetting alarms

14 replies

BoyMumof2x · 17/02/2023 10:04

My son is 5 and will be 6 in July. He has been dry during the day since about 2.5 years but is still wet every night. We have seen the GP who cannot help until he is 7 but he is getting so upset on a daily basis of being wet and having to wear pull-ups like his baby brother.
We started using the Malem bedwetting alarm this week and I'm sleeping on the floor next to him for support but unsure whether to continue as he doesn't even remember in the morning the alarm going off or me taking him to the toilet nor does he wake up on his own to it. Each time I have taken him to the toilet when the alarm goes off he doesn't pee so already emptied his bladder.

Night 1 - wet once but only pants and pjs were a little wet, responded to me waking him and the alarm ok
Night 2 - wet twice. First time he wet at 1am and got upset and freaked out by the alarm and was very wet. I cleaned him up and agreed we would take the alarm off as maybe not the right time for him yet. Half hour later we woke again saying he wanted the alarm back on so I went with it. He then wet again at 3.40am and was ok.
Night 3 - wet at 10.40pm and had to change first layer of bed as quite wet and could not wee in the toilet as already emptied bladder. He then wet again at 1am but this time he was so upset so we agreed just to put a pull up on which was a little wet when he woke this morning.

Now I was convinced we would stop the alarm now as he may be a bit too young and not ready but he has woken today adamant he wants to alarm on tonight and doesn't even remember it going off in the night and upset at me saying to stop the alarm.

Does anybody have any personal experiences or using the alarm? I know we are only 3 nights in so very early days but not sure this is going to work if he needs me to wake him when the alarm is sounding as he is in that much of a deep sleep and then getting upset in the night when I do wake him but not remembering a thing in the morning.

Any advice would be helpful? Just want to do best for him

OP posts:
GatherlyGal · 17/02/2023 10:15

I think the point of the alarm is for him to be woken as soon as possible after wetting so his brain links the wetting with the unpleasantness of being woken. If the alarm isn't waking him you need to do that as quick as you can. Taking him to the toilet won't work unless he is fully awake. If he's not remembering it sounds like he hasn't quite woken up!

It's hard but it works if you stick with it.

In the morning my DD (older than your son) would ask me to make her get up even when in the night she begged me to let her sleep !

Bert2e · 17/02/2023 10:16

Far too young and alarms can be very traumatic for children. Keep buying bed wetting pants and wait until his body matures enough to produce the hormone that stops urine production at night.

Whattheladybird · 17/02/2023 10:21

We’re under paediatric incontinence service for ten year old (never been dry at night) and 6 year old (only wet occasionally, goes in fits and spurts).

Ive tried alarms for both. For my older one it didn’t wake him up but made him very upset and agitated when we came and woke him up. Tried for several weeks, we were all more knackered and didn’t work. He is on medication which reduces the volume of wee overnight but hasn’t “fixed” it unfortunately.

my younger one has responded better to the alarm but for him he tends to be dry for several weeks, then wet for a night or three. So it’s hard to see how the alarm works if you see what I mean.

Our nurse says alarms can be helpful but it depends on the problem that’s being dealt with. Persevere but don’t let it ruin your life, you can always come back to it.

Incidentally, here you can be referred from the night of your fifth birthday for night wetting - it’s reduced from 7.

lots of advice on the ERIC website but drinking more (but earlier in the day) and taking out squash and fizzy drinks is highly recommended.

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DailyLaundry · 17/02/2023 10:25

You're only 3 days in! Give it a while longer.
As pp said you need to be waking him asap so his brain forms the connection. We had success with this - dc was a little older, maybe 6. (People on MN said wait for the hormone but that clearly wasnt the issue in our case).

I know it's hard but try (both of you) not to make it a big deal and get stressed out. In our case I think DC just wasn't waking up.

Original poster
BoyMumof2x · 17/02/2023 10:36

GatherlyGal · 17/02/2023 10:15

I think the point of the alarm is for him to be woken as soon as possible after wetting so his brain links the wetting with the unpleasantness of being woken. If the alarm isn't waking him you need to do that as quick as you can. Taking him to the toilet won't work unless he is fully awake. If he's not remembering it sounds like he hasn't quite woken up!

It's hard but it works if you stick with it.

In the morning my DD (older than your son) would ask me to make her get up even when in the night she begged me to let her sleep !

That's the same with my son. He really wants me or the alarm to wake him up and be dry and is so determined to do this but he is such a deep sleeper. I really do try to wake him and I'm sleeping right next to him on the floor so as soon as that alarm sounds I'm up, turn the light on and get him to walk to the toilet. Maybe it is just a matter of keeping going for longer to see if there is an improvement or alternatively waiting till he is a little older.
How long did it take your DD?

OP posts:
cushioncovers · 17/02/2023 10:38

We had the alarm but all it did was wake me up. My son slept through it and still wet the bed. We tried everything but in the end it was desomelt and then puberty that stopped it.

SpottyBumPony · 17/02/2023 10:38

DS is 4 and I recently spoke to the GP about bladder control. She mentioned a bed wetting alarm when he's a bit older but warned that it will take around 12 weeks to take effect.

Original poster
BoyMumof2x · 17/02/2023 10:38

Whattheladybird · 17/02/2023 10:21

We’re under paediatric incontinence service for ten year old (never been dry at night) and 6 year old (only wet occasionally, goes in fits and spurts).

Ive tried alarms for both. For my older one it didn’t wake him up but made him very upset and agitated when we came and woke him up. Tried for several weeks, we were all more knackered and didn’t work. He is on medication which reduces the volume of wee overnight but hasn’t “fixed” it unfortunately.

my younger one has responded better to the alarm but for him he tends to be dry for several weeks, then wet for a night or three. So it’s hard to see how the alarm works if you see what I mean.

Our nurse says alarms can be helpful but it depends on the problem that’s being dealt with. Persevere but don’t let it ruin your life, you can always come back to it.

Incidentally, here you can be referred from the night of your fifth birthday for night wetting - it’s reduced from 7.

lots of advice on the ERIC website but drinking more (but earlier in the day) and taking out squash and fizzy drinks is highly recommended.

Thank you. Will take a look at the ERIC website. I've done lots of researching on tips we can try. We will keep at it unless he asks to stop but think we will be heading down the paediatric route too

OP posts:
GatherlyGal · 17/02/2023 10:40

It does take a while I'm afraid. I was absolutely shattered as working like a loon at the time and being up every night.

My DD was desperate though as it was affecting sleepovers/ trips etc.

I think we had 2 weeks of no progress and then suddenly in week 3 it clicked.

We had many false starts though when we gave up and waited a few more months. It was her determination to keep going that made the difference this time.

WandaWonder · 17/02/2023 10:43

I had one personally but I was much older than that

Original poster
BoyMumof2x · 17/02/2023 10:45

DailyLaundry · 17/02/2023 10:25

You're only 3 days in! Give it a while longer.
As pp said you need to be waking him asap so his brain forms the connection. We had success with this - dc was a little older, maybe 6. (People on MN said wait for the hormone but that clearly wasnt the issue in our case).

I know it's hard but try (both of you) not to make it a big deal and get stressed out. In our case I think DC just wasn't waking up.

I know, I've read so many different threads about how long it's taken other children to become dry using the alarm and a lot I read seem to take quickly to it and shown improvement in the early days. Think I was just hoping it may be the same for us or at least see a little improvement but it is still very early days and every child is different.

I'm happy to stick with this for him and sleep on the floor helping him in the night for as long as it takes if that is what he wants but it's hard when he's getting upset in the night being woken but the next morning doesn't remember a thing and gets upset at me saying we will take a break from it for his benefit.

I keep calm about it all and really try to wake him and I'm sleeping right next to him on the floor so as soon as that alarm sounds I'm up, turn the light on and get him to walk himself to the toilet but think he is just such a deep sleeper.

Fingers crossed we will get there x

OP posts:
DailyLaundry · 17/02/2023 11:10

Good luck op. I remember how all- consuming it was with no clear solution. You will get there. It's so common in boys I think to still be wetting at night even at age 7, 8 etc.

I remember thinking "this has worked faster than I thought" with the alarm but it was definitely a matter of weeks, not days.

Not sure if it's helpful or not to say it's a distant memory for us now, not had any problems since. He still doesn't drink what I consider to be that much in the day - that was another thing I tried to do, get him to drink lots in the day so his bladder was filling up and he recognised when it needs emptying. Not sure that really did anything but worth a try!

Original poster
BoyMumof2x · 17/02/2023 11:22

DailyLaundry · 17/02/2023 11:10

Good luck op. I remember how all- consuming it was with no clear solution. You will get there. It's so common in boys I think to still be wetting at night even at age 7, 8 etc.

I remember thinking "this has worked faster than I thought" with the alarm but it was definitely a matter of weeks, not days.

Not sure if it's helpful or not to say it's a distant memory for us now, not had any problems since. He still doesn't drink what I consider to be that much in the day - that was another thing I tried to do, get him to drink lots in the day so his bladder was filling up and he recognised when it needs emptying. Not sure that really did anything but worth a try!

Yes that is helpful thank you. He isn't a huge drinker either but I'm trying to up his drink intake in the daytime then slow it down towards the end of the day and last drink is with his dinner. We will keep going! Thank you x

OP posts:
Original poster
BoyMumof2x · 17/02/2023 11:25

GatherlyGal · 17/02/2023 10:40

It does take a while I'm afraid. I was absolutely shattered as working like a loon at the time and being up every night.

My DD was desperate though as it was affecting sleepovers/ trips etc.

I think we had 2 weeks of no progress and then suddenly in week 3 it clicked.

We had many false starts though when we gave up and waited a few more months. It was her determination to keep going that made the difference this time.

I feel the same with the tiredness but hopefully we will get there. That's good that it clicked on week 3. I think we will persevere for a few weeks see if we see any progress if he still wants to carry on by then. Thanks for your help

OP posts:
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