Ex never asks how kids are but wants me to tell him

[Tillywq]

My ex sees our two kids EOW. In between he never asks how they are doing. I bought this up and said why he seems so uninterested in their lives. He says I should text him to update him everything about the kids because he wants to know. He said he won’t ask me first, he will just expect me to update him about parents evenings, hospital appointments etc. Should I bother? He doesn’t seem fussed to ask how kids are but wants me to tell him anyway. It makes my blood boil how he goes so long without even knowing how they are doing. What do you all do?

Well you did ask?

No. He can’t issue you orders.

If he asked, or did the same in return (sent you photos of his time with them and updates) then maybe. But this is a lazy man, delegating his job of even ASKING about the kids.

You're not his PA. If he wants to know about school events, for instance, he can get himself on the mailing list surely?
Pisses me off, all these men who expect women to facilitate their lives. You're not even married to him/in a relationship anymore.

Yes I asked he said tell him everything about the kids… but he doesn’t even ask so why should I bother 🫤

Well then don’t? He said tell him things if you want him to know but he obviously doesn’t care so don’t do it if you don’t want to tbh I wouldn’t have even said anything to him, it’s pretty normal for exes not to check in and when your kids are a bit older they can talk to him themselves

You’re not his PA, the school should be able to add him to the mailing list if HE asks them too.
If dc has a hospital appointment I would tell him when it is and suggest he attends, if he doesn’t I wouldn’t update him unless he asks. I wouldn’t inform him of a routine gp or dental appointment unless he asked.