Have I let my baby watch too much cocomelon

[Roseyrhubard]

Had a right few days with my 7 month old recently. We’ve put it down to teething as all the signs are there. However he has been throwing some serious tantrums and the days have been long. He is very whingey at the minute. He’s always been a little like this, at 4 months he used to cry at people a lot but he grew out of it so I’m hoping this will soon go too.

ive always let him watch tv from probably about 8-12 weeks old. Started with the dancing fruits and then cocomelon. Now I often put it on when I want to get stuff done around the house. (He does go in his jumperoo a lot too). I know you aren’t supposed to let them have a lot of screen time but it keeps him quiet and I still have a house to get on top of. Just read something that popped up online that links cocomelon to tantrums and now I’m massively over thinking it? Shall I take it away completely? Not sure how I would get anything done though. I often pop him in the high chair with toys have it on in background etc. I just feel like there’s so much pressure on being this perfect mum, i would love to sit and play with him all the time but I still have 1000 other things to do.

Our 3 babes love coco melon they get an hour in morning so I can tidy do washing etc and an hour at teatime other than that they don't watch alot

I think I need to get one esp when he gets more mobile. He doesn’t watch tv in the jumperoo as this is in our kitchen conservatory area. He just jumps around watching me and babbling to me in it. He does love it in there sometimes. It’s if I leave him in the leaving room that’s where the tv is put on so then I might pop him in the high chair or lay him on a play mat etc. I get longer to do what I need to do if I put the telly on. Tbh tho I feel like I’ve defo read enough to make a call on it haha I will be trying to limit it as much as possible! And defo look at getting a play pen or even a travel cot they’re similar aren’t they.

Thank you x

We banned cocomelon in our house as my DD was hooked to it, it was like she was in a trance: I also read about the link to behaviour and stopping it did help. I think I read something about cocomelon in particular being overstimulating.

Good alternatives I've found are miss Rachel, or hey Duggee. I also find just having music on is a good distraction for them too

id get a playpen (or use a travel cot if you’re short on space) make us dogs and cosy and put some tours in there on rotation when you need a moment. Your DS will be safer in there than he would be in bouncer while you’re occupied and can have a bit more of an explore than he can in the high chair. At this age their own toes are of interest to them - he won’t need many bits in there to be stimulated. Bit of nursery rhyme music if he’s fussy (you can sing along too!) or chat to him as you potter around.

Am not saying screens are the devil, but they arent the only way to get five mins to yourself. Letting babies learn how to be calm without being held and giving them opportunities to be happy entertaining themselves for a few mins is worthwhile - it’s a very valuable as they get older! No need to make a rod for your own back.

Aaargh - massive autocorrect fails. Can you tell I’m doing too many things at once?!

make it nice and cosy (nothing to do with dogs!)

toys (not tours)

sorry 🤦🏻‍♀️

Can I just say that these kinds of threads are all the same.

OP seeks reassurance about something that goes against most guidelines.

Posters divide into affirmers ( you are doing great, no one is perfect), those seeking affirmation ( I do/ did this too with my kids, pls tell me it’s ok), informers (don’t you know about the guidelines?!) and shamers.

Can’t OPs be transparent about what they are looking for? Affirmation or information?

And can’t we all just accept that yes, we all ( mostly) try our best. Being a mother is fucking hard. But this does not mean that the guidelines aren’t guidelines for a reason.

I stress about screen time and im also a bit obsessive about housework, i understand your dilemma.

I think.we introduced night garden at about 6 months old and he just wouldn't watch anything else until we discovered paw patrol at about 18 months! And now that's all he will watch. We have 2 slots a day for TV on normal days so if we have a day when it's watched more (if I'm ill for example) then I don't feel so guilty.

I do think on the whole, screens should be limited to being part of the day, not on all the time or used as a distraction to get jobs done. I know we all do our best in our own ways but I tried to work around it by having a play pen, or moving him to the same area as me with an activity (banging pans and spoons while I washed up for example) When he was a baby he would sit in his swing seat or moses basket and watch me while I chatted to him. He loves books too so I used to put him in his cot with some books with flaps and slides while I got dressed and it kept him so quiet! (We also keep books in the car and he 'reads' them on every journey bless him)

I had to adjust my housework to fit around him so did a lot in the evenings and weekends. It's not easy but don't be hard on yourself.

I will be honest and I will judge you. In about 10 years time I am sure they will work out that the huge rise in screen use and huge rise in anxiety, behavioural problems and mental health problems are linked. It starts somewhere and a 7 month does not need to watch TV. None of mine did until they were 2 and then only very limited. Judgy mcjudge I am!

Not anti screen time, for very young kids I think
cbeebies has lovely stuff. Our DS became somewhat obsess with versions of a certain song on YouTube at a shockingly young age (asking to change from version to version to version) we thought it was safe (it was nursery rhymes) but really the quality isn’t very good and it felt too bright, too loud, and he was so demeaning and insistent about which version
we have cut out YT now - and it has made a big difference. cbeebies only.
I wish we hadn’t ever done YouTube but feel we have recovered.

have you considered popping baby in a back carry baby carrier while you do jobs around the house?
this worked for us.

It is tough getting things done @Roseyrhubard! Personally, I think tv at that age is too young, especially something addictive like cocomelon.

Haha I can’t because he’s 98th centile he is rather heavy 😂

We had terrible tantrums and my DC wasn’t even watching very much. We cut the shows and the behaviour settled. The videos are really not good and tbh they learn more and are more entertained by watching you! You can have them with you and talk about what you’re doing. I ended up doing this and DC’s speech and language comprehension is way ahead of peers

He’s getting angry and frustrated because he isn’t getting what he wants fast enough. This behaviour is influenced by hyperstimulants like Cocomelon.

I’m not against screen time, I let my toddler watch it, but it’s important to a) limit it (under 1 definitely unnecessary) and b) make sure you research exactly what you’re letting them watch.

DH spent a lot of time with DS1 (now almost 4) during lockdown watching things on cbeebies together - twirliwoos, number blocks, moon and me, something special, teletubbies, Grace's amazing machines, etc.

He'd talk to DH1 and take an interest in the programmes. I think it was actually very good for DS1. His vocabulary is very good for his age and talking about all the things in the shows helped conversation skills as well as exposing DS1 to lots of different things that we couldn't do - e.g. teletubbies always has a segment with young children doing an activity.

I think you need to focus on quality screen time. Sit together, turn off the mindless songs/animations and watch educational TV instead. Narrate everything you see on screen - e.g. for the twirliwoos 'they're flying up towards the cloud. They're flying into the cloud. Now they're flying through the cloud. Where are they hiding. The they are - behind the xxxx.' Ask if they think it's going to be the stop/go car, the box or the very important lady. If you're interested and talk about it, they'll be interested and will talk about it.

I think you need to avoid any trance like screen time where they're hypnotised by crap - e.g. cocomelon, YouTube videos of diggers (unless you're narrating what's happening), music videos.

I haven't read the whole thread, but know mumsnet is anti screen time.

FWIW DS1 is now 17 and we have never restricted screen time. He is at college but in his spare time makes £££ editing videos for YouTubers across the globe. He will probably make a living out of it.

For me that access to screens has been invaluable

Exactly this.

I did a running commentary for DS1 long before he could speak. I do the same for DS2 - "Let's walk to the kitchen. I'm opening the door. Look! I used the door handle. It goes up and down. I'm going to pick up the kettle. I've opened the lid and now I'm going to turn on the tap. Look! Water is coming out of the tap. I'm filling up the kettle."

They love being talked to and seeing what's happening.

I'm not against screw time in general as my nearly 2 year old loves In The Night Garden and Moon and Me every evening but I really think 7 months old is far too young to be watching TV every day especially something like Cocomelon

If you're set on him watching TV then put something more chilled out on like Baby Club. Of course housework still needs doing but I just put DD on a play-mat with a load of toys and some music on whilst I did the chores

I think that with ones this tiny it is actually entertaining them a lot less than parents think - I think there's a lot of placebo effect. An 8-12 week old can't watch tv in any real sense, or distinguish it from shadows on the wall. I think you'd actually find it made a lot less difference if he watched a lot less than you imagine, both in terms of his 'behaviour' (not that that's really an appropriate term for a 7 month old!) but also in how long you get to get on with things.

I'd stop the TV, babies can entertain themselves. Mine will often "read" a book or play with toys. Have you heard of heuristic toys? Try that. They don't need TV

Bloody hell I wish there was a course for sone people to find their sense of proportion.

If you make the parenting choice to allow your baby to watch screens- there are a million more gentle, lovely things to watch.

Why on earth would you choose to put your child in front of such utter dross? I’m not going to bang on about it, previous posters have already said what a stimulant it is.

Ms Rachel on YouTube is GREAT and actually useful in developing language and signing.

We have a no YouTube (unless it's for a specific video to explain something such as Chinese New Year or volcano) and no whiny fucking Bing rule in our house.

YouTube has so much mindless crap and Bing induced bad behaviour wherever DS1 watched it.

I dont know what it is about cocomelon, it's like baby crack.
Sorry, I know it'll sound judgy, but absolutely no way should a 7m old be watching it. Baby proof and gate off a space, put baby down, explain you have things to do, stay within sight and hearing and get on with what you need to do. Baby might cry and moan, or try to learn to crawl, or investigate toys on the floor etc etc. Yes, it's hard to listen to a baby wailing for your attention but if baby can see and hear you they'll get used to it and learn to amuse themselves. If crying becomes too intense, skip housework and go out for a walk together.
So much brain development is happening at this age, there's absolutely no way they should be watching that stuff. After 2, yes, a bit, supervised, and still not cocomelon.
I've let my 3/ 4 year old watch it in the past, and they go mental when it's switched off. It's bad stuff. Put something else on if you must, like others have suggested.
But better to allow baby to explore and investigate and even cry, than to watch that.

In terms of getting stuff done, you have a few options:

• Take baby with you! Need to do the dishwasher/load of laundry/tidy the kitchen? Pop baby in their highchair, place a few toys on their tray and let them watch you work.

Make sure you narrate everything you do because a) they love to feel included and b) it’s fantastic early speech development

• Use a sling. I know you said baby is 98th percentile but with the right sling that isn’t an issue.

Visit a sling library and find what sling works for you. You can easily carry 2/3/4 year old toddlers with the right carry, similarly people with back issues it’s disabilities can easily carry too.

• When your husband is home from work, let baby and daddy have bonding time! Then you can rest/sleep/do housework/have me time etc

I’ve used a combination of them all but found #3 to be most effective as that allowed daddy and baby to form their own relationship and it meant that my time with baby could be spent on play and development.