To all the Parents who need childcare from their acquaintances/friends.
Ask in advance!
You know you are working and need help with your child in advance so ask - in advance!
Don’t just constantly ask last minute, say you’re going to pick up at a certain time and then be an hour late without letting me know. I know work can go later than expected but when you do this:
I have to shuffle our families afternoon around to accommodate you.
I haven’t made enough food for an extra person. I might mean I now have to go out shopping again especially it you do this multiple times a week. I also budget for a certain amount of food and need to know if I have extra mouths to feed.
You don’t see me fighting with my partner later on about how we went over on our food budget and have to buy the rest of our groceries on credit (if we are not overdrawn).
I can’t let my kids know what’s happening in advance which messes with their afternoon/bedtime routine. Now they are cranky as f&@k.
If you want people to take care and feed your child multiple times a week or just in general you need to let them know in advance with clear boundaries. You may feel bad about asking for help but I assure you it’s more of a big deal not to be upfront.
It sucks being around people that are in crisis mode all the time I understand we all go through crisis’s and I’m happy to help in those genuine times but your lack of planning makes everything a crisis and you are drawing me into it and it sucks.
Also bring your child over with all the s$&t that they need, especially if I have them for the day/overnight. I don’t want to have to scrounge around for basic things including shoes (yes shoes) because you can’t be arsed. I love your child but I don’t want to be responsible for them like a parent because I’m not their parent.
And yes I’ve already spoken to the parents I’ve experienced this with, it is however a running theme.
PS. Be aware that me taking your kids for free is of financial benefit to you. Treat me with respect and honesty.