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Parenting

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Bullying at nursery

3 replies

hourbyhour101 · 04/02/2023 20:14

Hi all I have a DD (4) who has gone to nursery happily since she was 10months old. The last month she's been hysterical saying she doesn't want to go and incredibly tearful.

I have spoken to nursery and they said she's fine and been happy and don't understand where it's coming from. She's gone into the preschool and seems now desperately unhappy. I had a chat with her and it turns out her friends (whom she's known since she started ) and she used to play with happily, have started kicking her and saying she can't play with them and telling her to go away. Obviously it's a small group and if out of 6 (4 of them by the names of them) are being like this it's a bit of a group mentality. She starts school in September and I'm worried my kind little girl is becoming more reclusive and upset.

Nursery have spoken to her about feelings and acknowledge that she's said at the moment but don't seem to be doing much to stop it.

I don't know if this is relevant but one of the boys who's just joined is the key workers sisters child. And he's been leading the charge with the whole you can't play with us.

Obviously if she was older I would say go find other people to play with, but how do I explain this to a 4 year old and what should I tell her to say ?

OP posts:
difficultlemons · 04/02/2023 20:32

Just bumping for you op.
I don't have a child that age yet but can imagine how hard it must be to hear this and to see the effect it's having on her.

I guess in your shoes I would accept that to a degree this is life and she will encounter all sorts of relationship challenges through her life. This is an early experience so use it to teach her to cope in future.

What would you do in her situation? Find others who are more friendly. Teach her self confidence and tell her all the reasons she can be proud of herself and doesn't have to be with anyone who makes her sad

difficultlemons · 04/02/2023 20:33

There's a cute episode of Bluey called "bin day" which deals with something similar she might like

hourbyhour101 · 04/02/2023 22:50

@difficultlemons ohhh she loves bluey thank you.

I suppose I had mentally prepped myself for school time and this happening. But at nursery? It's such a small group.

I think my problem is she was friendly with them all before and suddenly I don't know ? Maybe new kid starting has started something.

Thank you for your advice I really am stumped so any suggestions are received gratefully

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