15 month old petrified of the bath after illness

[Newmummy343]

Hi
I'm just looking for some advice please. Long story short my 15 month old got invasive Strep A during Xmas time and ended up with a brain abscess. He got operated on, is now home and so much better. He has some fatigue and we were told he'd be like this for a couple of months. However, my main issue is he is now petrified of the bath. Before he got ill he loved the bath.

As soon as he even enters the bathroom now he is so scared and spends the time in the bath crying/shaking trying to climb out. I don't know if he's scared we'll hurt where his scar is (behind the ear and front of ear). Or if he's still a bit sore.

I'm just wondering if anyone had any advice on what to do. I don't know whether to try being in the bath with him? But even getting him in the bathroom is difficult. I'm a first time mum and don't know if I'm being silly and maybe it's 'normal' to go through a phase like this and its nothing to do what happened and just coincidence.

Thanks 😊

Well for a start I wouldn’t force him to have baths if he is scared and trying to climb out. Could you give him a wash down in another room until he is happier in the bathroom. Then I would try to make the bathroom a happy place. Pop him in there with some toys until he relaxes. Then maybe see if you can get him to do water play in the kitchen sink, try some new toys, bubbles, anything you can think of to get him comfortable again.
Once he’s had a bit of time try him in the bath again but don’t force him if he seems scared. See if you can start by getting him to lean over and do water play in the bath and then see if he wants to get in. At this stage you could also try getting in with him, keeping it fun with lots of games, blowing bubble etc

My DD went through exactly the same thing at around the same age. She would SCREAM if we tried to get her in the bath. I was terrified that it would be a long term thing but actually it only lasted 2 weeks. During that time we just sponged her down and tried again every few days (very gently and stopped as soon as she showed distress). One day she just accepted it again. Just our experience, maybe not helpful.

DC went through a phase of bath fear, a few months. My mum did lots of splash time in the sink at her house and at home we Washed her in a big washing up bucket in the living room, toys and TV, as it wasn't the same associations. Have been able to get her back into the bath now and all is fine.

can you give him a bath in a clean washing up tub in the kitchen sink (or maybe the kitchen floor). that would let him get clean and enjoy splashing without the sight of the bathroom that he has taken against.

At other times, walk into the bathroom with him, sing a song for a minute/wave in the mirror/play with a toy and then walk out with him. That will help him gradually get used to the idea that the bathroom itself is not a scary place.

when he is confident going into the bathroom, sit in the bath with him (fully clothed) and let him get used to that.

keep gradually stepping towards having a bath in the bathroom.

also, find & read any baby books that feature having fun in the bath. Make it an entertaining place.

So sorry that your little boy was so scarily ill. X

Thanks everyone for your replies I knew you'd all give great advice 😊

Also thanks @Ginflinger - not going to lie its been really tough but the main thing is he's here and with us. I just feel a bit stupid as thought we'd get home and it wouldn't take long for him to be okay again but he's so exhausted some days and I guess I just thought he'd be better by now but I need to remind myself it was a major infection. I just hate seeing him so upset 😔

I wouldn't sweat the fact he's not having a bath, I would bath mine once a week at that age.

I would try getting in the bath and letting him see you in it. If you have someone who can look after him while he watches you in there from the door. Do this a few times until he shows an interest in coming in too.

Oh sounds like you've all been through the mill.

Mine went from bath joy as babies to bath hatred at toddlers so whilst it definitely could be related it's also may not be.

I would get in the bath and OH would pop them in with me. I'd start off by keeping it fun and not worrying so much about hair washing.

Could you get some new bath toys? Or just old caps and lids and funnels and let him play over the bath with them just to gently reintroduce the idea that it's a fun space?

There's a little iggle piggle toy bath boat with disco lights underneath that really helped us. Good luck!

Could you get an inflatable bath and use it in the kitchen/living room.
maybe the fear of the bathroom is because it looks similar to a hospital environment?(ie plain walls, sleek surfaces)
he’s too young to tell you what is wrong so lots of positivity around bathtime from you will help.

I would leave the bath for a bit and then slowly reintroduce it. So perhaps one day say oh i was just in the bathroom and some new toys have arrived. Then play with them in the bathroom but with no hint of getting in the bath. So a boat or toy fish, then next time fill the bath and let him sit on the floor and play with them in the water. Perhaps some fun lights next and then he may get in of his own accord.