Conflict and parenting

[Toloveandtowork]

I knew kids can be hard work, but wasn't prepared for the amount of conflict day to day, in my case for 16 years. I have two boys, one a tween who is yet to show me the worst of it.

I was pondering what effect all this conflict has, of having to ignore my natural instinct to fight, flight or flee when the going gets though. In my case, it"s like getting an emotional pounding day after day.

I'm not looking for advice about my particular situation.

I'm a single mother and have asked for help which is coming.

I'm more looking to talk about how the fuck one person is supposed to bear the brunt of living with this.

What does it do to your mental and physical health and psyche after years of it?

I'm talking about extreme sibling rivalry, insolence, disrespect, shouting, screaming, throwing things and now, truancy. There may be ADHD in the mix.

I know it's normal for children to push boundaries, but what about the one adult in the house who takes the brunt?

I have been more fortunate than you in this regard. However, in a previous profession I undertook Conflict resolution training which did give a few tips on self care - might be worth a look into for the self care/well being protection elements.

I hope it eases soon - I have a distinct memory of my mother throwing a basin of water over my two brothers at one stage....

Thanks for your reply. I do a lot of self care, walks in nature, meditation, yoga etc, but it's still too much for me to bear.

Despite the self care, I feel like I'm permanently in fight or flight mode.