Is a dummy a terrible idea?

[Snugglemonkey]

I am really struggling at night with my baby. A bit during the day too I suppose, but less so. She is absolutely amazing and doing so well. She loves her milk and is gaining well 75th centile, so no issue.

However, she spends HOURS comfort sucking. She is ok lying beside me, as long as she is sucking my boob and I have my arm around her. Otherwise, I hold her and feed her. She is only 8 weeks, so obvs I am just being responsive to her needs. During the day she is very inquisitive, very engaged in watching everything. But I get no sleep. She just wants me to have my boob in her mouth at all times. She is not feeding, just holding my nipple, sometimes even letting it go, but going mad if my breast is removed. She likes to use it as a cushion.

I am usually grand even with the lack of sleep, but last night and tonight I am really struggling.

How can I get her in her bed? Would a dummy stop her just wanting my boob in her mouth?

A dummy may well help. It helped one of mine but not the other. Definitely worth a try, it’s so important that you get enough sleep.

A swaddle wrap might help as well and white noise.

Our son was similar, always wanting the comfort of my nipple to sleep. I tried a dummy around 5 weeks and honestly haven't looked back since. It has made such a difference. He is now nearly 17 weeks and will happily go down in his crib with his dummy (and has started sleeping through the night now too). I do worry about the battle we might have when we get him to give it up, but to be honest, I am just grateful I've been able to get some decent sleep again and I will leave that battle for future me to deal with! Good luck x

Try the dummy!!

You have no reason to feel bad about using one. If it helps you to feel better, there is actually some research showing they can help regulate baby’s breathing, reducing the risk of SIDS.

Hope you get some sleep soon.

Some kids love them, that's what they're made for. Mine loved it but constantly dropped it or threw it out of reach so screamed all night because he couldn't settle without it so was a nightmare. But then it was the only thing that stopped him screaming to start with

I have an 8.5 month old that is STILL like thus

(the reason im posting at 3am is cause he’s attached to my boob and I can’t sleep)

he hates the car and the pram and will never just chill

my biggest regret is not giving him a dummy

My eldest never had one but my youngest really needed one to help her settle. She only ever had it for sleep and gave it up with no hassle when she was 2.

If it'll help do it.

My sister swore NO DUMMIES till she had her first that nearly screamed the windows out! The old "magic plug" taught him how to self-soothe and sleep and te whole family was better off. Try it, it might be the miracle cure you all need.

Ds had a dummy from the first night we came home, it was great when he was unsettled & I knew he had been fed, was dry, not too hot or too cold. He kept his dummy until he was nearly 5 but has perfect teeth. I managed the lost dummy at night saga by tying a dummy on each corner of the muslin he cuddled to sleep, he never let go of the muslin so never lost his dummy.

My youngest had a dummy and it definitely helped her settle at night although we did get to a point where she'd lose it in the crib multiple times middle of the night so there would be a lot of getting up & down to help her find it.

That said, my 2nd is 2 weeks old at the moment and I'm planning to avoid giving her one if i can purely because of the battle we had getting my daughter to give hers up - so if you do give one, try and remove it sooner rather than later.

Only circumstance I'll give 2nd child one is if she starts to suck her thumb to soothe instead - you can get rid of a dummy when time comes, but not the thumb 😄

I also have an EBF 8 week old :) We introduced a dummy at 4 weeks because he loved to comfort suck (and would actually sometimes get upset when there was milk coming out when he was full and sucking!). It hasn't affected feeding, but we're getting longer stretches of sleep overnight and it definitely helps calm him.
I wasn't sure when he was born if I wanted to use one, but it's working well for us so far :)

I used dummies for all four of my kids. I hated them, but they saved my sanity as I had babies who would literally stay all day on the boob if they could.

I left it too late removing the dummy with my first two (twins) and they ended up using them until far too old (4 and 6 years!). With my second two babies, the dummies were gone by four months - I waited until I had a bit more sanity and then reduced the dummy use by letting them have the boob more often. Then the boob needs naturally reduced as baby became busier.

I say dummies have their place. Don't let them replace feeding. Don't use them to stretch the timings between feedings. But when you know your baby is done feeding and you need a break, they help. Remove them early - don't let them be some something your mobile baby can suck on while moving around!

Absolutely definitely 100% give it a try!

Dummies rock!

Just wanted to add that latching but not sucking and just wanting to be next to boob is something both mine did when they had trapped burps - wanting to feed to feel better but can't physically take more down. After a burp they'd be happy with a normal cuddle.
But certainly give a dummy a try, mine just wanted to use them to chew on. Got no comfort from it after about 3 months old.

When she falls asleep on the boob, break the suction using your finger and gently remove your nipple while pushing her mouth closed with a finger on her chin. Hold it there for a few seconds to let her tongue suction to the roof of her mouth, and she should stay asleep with no nipple. Or, use a dummy if that doesn't work

A dummy is an artificial nipple, they work because babies often want to comfort suck constantly. No they’re not a terrible idea, and yes they may work for you.

Give it a try - my baby was like @Nejnej2 's - wanted to suck and got really upset if the got a mouthful of milk when he was already full.

He's 7 months now and he barely uses the dummy any more. Didn't have to wean him off, he just gradually stopped wanting it - likes to hold it in his hand sometimes but barely puts it in his mouth.

Both of my now adult chn had dummies I had one as a baby too Sleep is the most important thing.

My 16 month old still has one for nap and bedtime and I have no regrets whatsoever. We will wait til he's old enough to understand the dummy fairy story before taking it away.

You might go through a period of replacing it in the night if she loses it, but then when they're old enough you can throw 10 glow in the dark ones in the cot every night and they find one themselves if they lose it.

Dummies are great for babies who want to comfort suck. But it's up to the baby and all babies are different. My first loved them and we used them constantly for naptime/nighttime sleep. We were all ready to go with dummies for DC2, but DC2 just spits them out.

Thanks, but she cannot stand being constricted.

Thank you for the replies, I think I will get some and see how she likes it.