Ds going to school alone

[SpinningFloppa]

DS is in year 6 he is 11 in March, he is scared to travel to and from school alone. He already goes to the local shop alone and sometimes walks home alone from the park (he doesn’t go to the park alone but if I take younger siblings and he wants to go home he will walk home) both are 5 mins walk away from our house. However school is another issue and he won’t go alone (it’s a 15/20 mins walk however we usually get the bus) this week I have had horrendous flu and only just starting to feel better so have the younger children so haven’t been in school, however DS has been fine so I’m theory should have been at school but I was unable to get him there as I wasn’t well enough. At his age he should have been able to go alone and most of his class do. How can I help him get confident to travel to school alone as he will need to do this soon anyway? The bus literally stops outside our door and literally outside his school and I see children in his class doing the journey alone. (Ds was under assessment for asd but he would be HF and definitely able to travel alone it’s more of a confidence/ anxiety issue)

Yes I just mean school wouldn’t collect them and I wouldn’t expect them to it’s just often suggested on these type of posts that school could pick them up (they don’t)

Where did I say I’m always ill? This is about going forward for September as he will have no choice then

As a parent to two, now adult dc with autism who even now, both struggle with public transport I can give you an insight as to why they struggle and maybe your ds shares some of their worries.
So, public transport is unpredictable, they don't know before they get on the bus whether the driver will be one that just grunts and looks at their pass (preferable) or one that takes the pass and asks them where they are going (both have situational mutism and they might not be able to reply which ups the anxiety which makes it more likely that they aren't going to be able to talk) Ds can't read whether the driver wants his pass dd has a phobia of germs and she hates anybody touching somehing she will have to touch too.
They prefer to sit in the single seat at the front, that seat might not be available another worry. They sit in an alternative seat, someone might sit next to them, neither are comfortable with that. They may speak to them again they probably can't speak back. They may then have atention drawn to them when that other person considers the "youth of today" rude (this has happened) They might want to get off before the person next to them does, they can't say excuse me and don't know how to get out without offending the person next to them.
Someone might get on the bus who is loud, unpredictable, wearing a strong perfume, with bad BO all these disorientate them and makes it difficult to manage the situation.
Getting on the bus and knowing when toget off is only a very insignificant part of managing a bus journey you see.

I would personally be taking him to school regardless if I'm ill or not if he hasn't got anyone else to go to school with. I would worry that he is still quite young and anything could happen to him, especially if he feels scared I would feel awful if anything happened to him knowing that I could have prevented it. Is there no way in September that he could be dropped off to school a bit earlier and then the younger ones taken to school. I'm sure the library would be open or at least he in in school grounds and overtime he will find someone else to walk/catch a bus with and build his confidence. I was so nervous at that age and there's no way I would feel confident walking to school on my own. Even now, if it's dark I will not go out by myself. x

Thank you. He doesn’t say what it is and you are right it’s probably a combination of things adding up.

Most parents don’t take that age group to school. DT’s got the Tube on their own most of the way (usually met friends on the way) and then walked to school

All children are different and sounds like OP's child isn't ready.

Personally I would not let my 10 year old child take the tube unsupervised.

Hi OP, in your situation (admittedly not London) I asked parents of class friends who drive/walk from near us to take my DS with them.

Is this possible for you? If I were driving I'd go out of my way to help a mum/classmate in your situation.