"Rapist" "paedophile" "sex offender"

[MrsSnape]

What would you do if your 9 year old boy was being called these kinds of names at school by another 9 year old boy?

What should the school do about it?

Lets say that offensive name calling isn't the only problem with this boy...what would your reaction be?

Have the school done anything so far?

I would go in and see the teacher, quietly. Explain that your ds is worried, that there seems to be a situation of verbal bullying and that the other little boy seems quite disturbed (he has obviously been hearing some nasty stuff).
It may well be that the school know something about the situation already. There was a little boy in dd's year who behaved very oddly and I only recently found out the horrendous experience that lay behind it; it was the sort of thing one doesn't like to think about.
So tackle it as a problem that you and the school share, and ask if they have any suggestions on how to support your ds. Assume, until you know different, that the school genuinely want to help your ds, and take it from there.

no. This boy has been "a problem child" since the day he started at the schools nursery. His entire family are the same. His eldest brother is in prison, another brother was expelled from school and now, at 9 this boy seems to be going the same way.

Problem is he gets away with everything...lets call him "david"...it will be a case of "David has done so and so..." (teacher "oh...well we know what David is like..."

"David" has stabbed people with pencils and allsorts, he is also extremely disruptive in class.

But these name callings first started when my friends baby girl was born, her son is in his class and "david" said to him "I bet you mess around with your sister and shag her don't you? you sex offender" and "sex offender" was routinely said to him and my son thereafter.

Then it progressed to "peodophile" and the latest one is "rapist".

The school have been informed numerous times and all we get told is "We'll have a word with him" etc

sorry cory, cross post

Ask to see their bullying policy and then i'd state what they have to do in a letter to the head.Are governors next step if nothinghappens?
Revolting behaviour from a very damaged little boy.

report him for neglect etc to social services? He shouldn't really understand these words and certainly not enough to say to someone I bet you mess around with your sister etc etc.

I can only think if you persist daily in speaking to the head about etc and the affect the bullying has on your son they will have to do something.

Definitely persist in speaking to the head. They have a duty of care towards both the other boy and their ds and sticking their heads in the sand isn't going to help either of them. It's not a question of 'having a word' with the boy, he needs support (and your son needs protection) on a totally different level.

sorry, 'your ds'

The British media has a lot to answer for really.

having experienced this kind of thing i would visit the head put my complaint in writing and write to the governors(probably none of which will do any good but at least your standing your ground) the other thing i would suggest is to teach your son coping strategies either he can smile at the boy and say well you seem to know a lot about that dont u...(this is of course likely to get your son hit)or he can ignore the boy and not react at all....v hard to do not mastered by any of my children yet ....is there no older boy your son can pal up with?
arent some kids bloody awful

MrsSnape, I have no good advice for you, but I just wanted to say there was a David in DD's class at her old school, she was physically attacked by him on more than one occasion, stabbed in the arm with a pencil, he jumped off a bench onto her back with his knee, would swear and fight and ugh, he was a horrid little boy.

I overheard his mother and his father discussing how they would put him and his cousin (who was the same year as him at school) in a room and teach them to fight each other, the one who cried first was the 'loser'

I mentioned it time and time again, but the teacher didn;t seem to say anything except 'yes, we are aware of David's behaviour' turns out the school were trying everything possible not to have to exclude him because they knew if they did his life would probably never have any path to follow, but every thing they tried his parents would counteract, the teacher was even taking stick at the classroom door from his family for claiming that she was 'picking on David' and making an example of him

I'd say go and speak to the teacher, everytime something happens, they need to know how much is going on, but I doubt there will be muich they can do, sadly as his family probably aren't exactly supportive either.

Poor kid

I would also consider reporting him to Social Services. Those ideas must be coming from his home, this isn't normal playground swearing. This little boy is having his childhood taken away from him, he might well be better off in foster care.

Excellent post, VictorianSqualor. As an ex teacher I recognise the situation you describe. These situations are just so hard for EVERYONE concerned. Your poor ds MrsSnape, the poor child who behaves like this, the poor teacher........(I only say the latter because of the verbal abuse I had to put up with from some parents in these situations) There are no easy answers.

hi,yes we have a child like this in our school,to some extent the head is limited to what he can do. this child has made ds1 life a misery over the last 18 months or so. we have complained time and time again,and so have several other parents . the child was placed in our school after being excluded from another primary school close by.
i think i would have moved ds1 to another school if he wasn't nearly at the end of yr6 and if ds2 wasn't there(he is happy). i think its kind of 'pot luck',where ever you go,sooner or later a child will be there like this,there must be one in nearly every school.it is very sad that other children have to suffer because of one that has obviously got problems but the system is not designed well enough to cope with these kids.