Newborn sleep

[Carlyliam]

Hi, I’m just after advise and seeing what other parents do in regards to newborns and putting them to bed,
I have a week old baby and I am wondering if people put they babies to bed in the next to me crib before going to bed themselves or if you go to bed the same time as your baby.
we are trying to get her bathed feed and ready for bed for around 7ish every night but struggling to if we still have her with us sleeping in living room or if it’s safe to leave her in the next to me crib asleep till we go up to bed a couple hours later.
we have a baby monitor set up and can watch her from downstairs.
if not what age would you leave them before going to bed yourself in same room.

Advice is that babies should not sleep alone until 6 months.

We decided on a 9pm bedtime for our newborn and just went to bed at the same time.

I let my baby sleep on her own with baby monitor at 12 weeks, apparently when they are really new the mothers breathing helps regulate the newborns too

OP have you read the safe sleep advice on the Lullaby Trust website? So much information there.

We keep the baby with us in the evenings and then take the baby to bed at the same time but just go to bed a bit earlier than usual. I would never leave a newborn on their own to sleep for that long!

Do what you are comfortable with. Your baby may settle best with peace and quiet

Hi
thanks for advice.
yea we keep her with us at all times and even when she sleeps through day we are always close to her.
luckily she seems to sleep through the tv and when the hoover is on in other rooms or people pop in to see her.
It was more just the moving her from downstairs to upstairs to put her in the next to me crib and her waking up what we were thinking about but we currently just take her up to bed with us at 9.
what age would you start a proper routine with her or is that nothing to worry about yet

Let her to sleep in a Moses basket in the lounge of an evening until your bedtime, then take her up with you?

We just kept them with us downstairs until we wanted to go to bed. Usually around 11pm at very newborn age as I hated going to bed early just to be in for a long night of waking for feeds all night long.

You sound a bit clueless OP. Have you read any resources?

Most people aim to start a routine from 4 months. A week is way to small to be thinking about routines.

Moses basket all the way! We just popped them in there then carried them to the bedroom when we went to bed and then on the stand next to me so I could easily feed in the night. It’s great yours settle in the next to me, ours didn’t as it swamped them. We went from Moses basket to the main crib in our room (which was the first time they slept through at 10w! We did invest in a good mattress. I’d definitely go for the basket, people give them away, we got two in the end, one downstairs, one up. So useful when you’re doing stuff like making tea, food etc.

Go to bed with your baby. I moved my son in his own room at 11 weeks. Best thing for both of us. He slept through the night x

I started a routine when he was about 8 weeks. Bath and set bed time. I used to put him upstairs then and used the baby monitor x

That's a bit harsh @Raspberry290.

Unfortunately I think these days there is a lot of unrealistic expectations on newborns/very young babies to sleep on their own in a cot without any assistance to get to sleep etc. When I had my first I had read so many people say their baby slept through from 12 weeks, self settled etc, but what a load of shit for the most part that was (I know some babies magically just sleep). It made me think my baby should be doing the same and therefore made me so stressed about routines and sleep etc it was horrible.

I wouldn't worry about putting them up to bed any time soon, as long as they're happy downstairs with the tv on just keep them with you for a few months and then you can start a loose bed time routine.

We had a strict bedtime routine when he was younger but the older he's got the more I've realised he is his own person and no routine will make him go to bed at the same time every night and then sleep through every night unfortunately.

Mumsnet is fucking horrible sometimes. Just no need.

@Carlyliam I’d keep her with you until you go to bed, let her sleep downstairs then go up, feed and bed. We got ours in to a routine from the start and then starting putting them to bed and going up a few hours later from about 2 months old.

you’ll get lots of people saying they go to bed with their baby at 7pm to stick firmly to the guidelines but guidelines is what they are - you have to weigh up the risks yourself and decide if you’re comfortable leaving your baby on their own to sleep for an hour or two without you. Fwiw, I was of the view that while sleeping in the same room is advised, bf also reduces the risk of SIDS and people generally are happy to bottle feed and don’t feel like it increases the risk. So I was ok to leave the baby for an hour or two to sleep

Baby needs to be with you for 6 months at least (12 months recommended by some countries) its not about seeing them on a monitor, but your breathing regulating theirs to protect against SIDs.

Let them sleep on you or in a moses basket if you can put them down, we didn't even attempt bedtime routines until way past 6 months - just hung out in the living room with them snoozing. No point doing bedtime with a week old they'll be up again in minutes to feed

Go with the flow, don't set a time for bed etc this early on.
Enjoy the cuddles, extra hours with you downstairs.
Like pp I didn't go to bed till quite late in the newborn days so I timed it with a feed, when I knew he was due one I took him up and fed in the bedroom and popped him into the basket in that room.
Then I wasn't scared of waking him unnecessarily.

Yea you read about all these expectations and what other people do and you start overthinking should my baby be doing that why isn’t she or what do I need to change

Thanks for all the advise,
we tend to go upto bed around about when it’s her feed time so she then gets fed and winded and then cuddles and eventually put into the next to me crib
Was just wondering if it was better to have her settled and things earlier than what we would tend to go up to bed.

Not clueless
just curious as to how other parents do things any advise is always helpful
especially when I overthink a lot of things.

why you even on a page like this if your just going to call people out and not even help people

My baby is 5 months and she sleeps in the same room as us all the time. We will have her upstairs on the monitor in the next couple of weeks though. They recommend them to have all sleep in the same room as an adult for the first 6 months, this decreases the chance of SIDS as baby does not fall into too deep sleep then.

I wouldn't even bother with trying to instil a routine for a week old baby. We tend to do bath and settling down at around the same time every night but that's about it. My baby has a bath, book and then feed, she falls asleep on me/in her crib downstairs and then I take her up with me at around 9.30 and transfer to her crib. Just also be mindful about only having your baby sleeping in quiet rooms - the last thing you want is a baby who can't fall asleep with any background noise! My baby will sleep regardless of background noise and that's probably because we've had her up with us and napping on the go!

Yea that’s what we are going to do now just bath and settle down around the same time every night, and try keep doing everything as we would noise wise so she gets use to the noise. She isn’t bothered by the hair dryer or tv and us getting up and down so fingers crossed stays that way
thanks

I wrote a lots of calm piano music to help my daughter sleep. Hopefully it might help your little one too! It will probably relax the parents at least haha

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2CcaizgUWrkmbpXiVKvLu9?si=5217a0f8ba6f4ded