DS follows me around the house. Why?

[newmannewday]

He is extremely independent and always has been. But he always follows me

He will be engaged playing, running around or even on a tablet watching his programmes. But if I leave the room, he ends up gravitating towards me

Why does he do this? He does have special needs so I can't ask him

My daughter is 1 and crawls to where I am, but she's a baby and probably worries I'll be gone if she doesn't follow. But DS is a confident boy and knows I'm coming back, so why does he follow me like this all the time?

He will happily be watching Ben and Holly but if I'm in the kitchen he will move himself onto the bottom stairs so I'm in eye view

Sorry haven't worded that very well! What I mean is why is he doing this because he doesn't engage with me. It's just to follow me and set up camp with what he's doing nearby

But he isn't interested in interacting and just lets me get on with it so why follow me in the first place?

How old is he?

Almost 6

It's not just downstairs. If I happen to go upstairs to put washing away, he just has to follow me up too and then straight back down when I come down

But goes to school on a school bus without hesitation and runs off. Doesn't really cry if he's hurt himself and brushes it all off, so I'm not sure why he feels the need to do this

My ds is almost 21 and when he's home he does this too!

@Ravageur I'm not sure if in reality it's nice but that sounds so so sweet 🥲

It's probably his way of interacting with you, sharing his space with yours.

FOMO? You might be secretly eating some chocolate or something 😉

Well that explains it! Haha, would be the first in my face if I was eating so maybe he is just watching out to see if he's missing out on snacks

He likes being close to you but doesn't need direct interaction. In my experience all children that age prefer being around someone else, they don't want to be alone in a room.

Exactly this!

You say you can’t ask him as he has SEN so I’m assuming non verbal? And you say he doesn’t appear bothered about seeking out your attention. But he follows you around so he clearly is showing you that you are a very significant person in his life. This is his way of showing his bond with you.

Its completely normal.

If there is someone else at home, I'd rather be in the same room than alone.

I used to do this to any family member I could when I was about 16. I was anxious and didn’t like being alone, I didn’t need directly engaged with I just liked it better when there was someone else in the room with me

I studied for all of my exams at the kitchen table so I could be close to my mum when she was cooking, as much as it came from anxious it is a fond memory of mine

I'm the opposite, unless it's my DC. If not I am itching to get away after a while

Bless you 🥰

Our son (ASD/SLD) is now 13 and has stopped following us around the house, it was always reassurance in his case as he was unused to being on his own unless in bed. But now if he gets left on his own in the living room for more than a minute or two, he will sit really still on the sofa and behave impeccably - whereas if we were with him, he'd be running around, playing with toys, bouncing a ball. It's as though he's unsure how to behave if we're not there so he defaults to calm and quiet mode. It's also taken him quite a few years to get used to the idea that he can independently go up to his bedroom to play whenever he wants, rather than being led up there.

My toddlers are two. If one of them is alone in one room, and I and their twin are in a different room, they'll come to me and say "I alone, I need a friend".
So they always like to have someone in the room with them.

My10 year old still does this 😏

My daughter does this too, she's 8. I think she just likes sharing her space with me even if she's not talking to me or anything.

I came from a big family.

5 siblings and small terraced house.

I'm used to always having people living on top of each other.

I rather have the company even if I'm not directly interacting with them.

My seven year old is the same. Just checks if I'm around without speaking to me. Been going on for a while now. He doesn't like bring on his own.

Because you're his person. 💖

My daughter does this, but with cuddles! She gets love and attention in abundance but I could be mad busy, eating my tea, in the bath, doing the pots like inconvenient and she will be like I want a hug 😅 she makes me laugh. Just accept it that our kiddies love us.

I call 11 yr old Dd my little shadow for this reason, I figured she needs the reassurance of being with me. As sweet as it is, it does gets annoying (not that I tell her) if I’m pottering cleaning the house and everywhere I turn she’s behind me.