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Toddler bedtime battles - HELP!

2 replies

BridieConvert · 08/01/2023 00:04

Long background incoming.

TLDR; toddler possibly having nightmares and scared to go to sleep, looking for tips/advice/words of encouragement

background: My DD is 2 (3 in March), she used to be great at self soothing but has been gradually getting worse over the past 6-8 months.
We expected issues as I gave birth to second DD in September. She absolutely loves her wee sister and dotes on her but I know she will be feeling a bit put out.
We also moved house in May and bought her a “big girl bed” for her new room - regretting this now and wishing we’d kept her in the cot longer but you live and learn I suppose.

Bedtime routine has been the same for well over a year now - bath, supper, brush teeth, toilet, stories in bed and then sleep.
We used to lie in the bed reading stories but have now moved to sitting in a chair beside the bed (DH and I do night about). We set a 5 minute timer and sit there until the timer goes off then we leave the room. She always gets up and needs taken back to bed. It used to be once but now it can last up to 2 hours where she gets incredibly frustrated and upset and it’s exhausting having to just guide her back to bed all the time!

She wakes up once or twice overnight and comes into our room asking to be taken back to bed - I have no issue with this as I’m guessing she wakes up and just wants reassured we’re still here. Recently she’s been crying/shouting out when she wakes up and when I ask her what’s wrong she says she “can’t find the words”, which makes me think she’s having nightmares and that she is acting up at bedtime trying to keep herself awake because she is scared to go to sleep.

Any thoughts/advice/anecdotes/pearls of wisdom welcome!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
SeaToSki · 08/01/2023 00:07

Put her back in her cot

stair gate on her bedroom door

sticker chart for staying in bed

new teddy..dont wake teddy up by getting out of bed

a device that she can push a button on that will tell her a story (lullaby style) to sooth her back to sleep

she has to relearn to self sooth (they forget and need the push to find a new way)

Scramble1805 · 08/01/2023 06:21

Didn't have the same issue but we had a fisher price sea horse which I thought would be great for nighttime reassurance. If you do get something like this maybe keep it just for night so it feels more special for her.
Also maybe a projector night light?

The timer sounds a bit unnecessary to me, my son would probably panic over this as he'd know we would get up to leave at some point but doesn't know and can't control when. After we've read to him we usually sing him 2 or 3 songs before saying goodnight. But at 3 1/2 he's getting out of this now and we only do it if he's upset or overtired.

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