How do I get DS out of this!?

[justcouldntthinkofausername]

DS 21 months. Has started waking up at 2:30am every night. No matter how late or early I put him down, it's like clock work!
He will throw his dummy and comforter over the side of the cot and stand there crying, until the cries get louder and I have to go in.
I will try several times to lie him back down but it makes him x10 worse he just keeps standing up with his arms up, screaming. I've had no option but to pick him up, I've tried holding his and rocking him gently to calm him down but as soon as I put him back in his cot he starts again so I've been putting him with me and DH. As soon as his head hits our pillows he's fast asleep and does not wake up once until morning.
I know it's probably separation anxiety, and his routine has been altered due to the Xmas period and having both me and DH home is very different for him since we both normally work FT. But I am stuck at how to break this 'new broken sleep routine', he can't keep coming in with us every night. But at the same time, the household needs sleep!
Any tips please, anyone?

There's a developmental leap around that age which could be the cause. As with all small child things it's a phase

I'd make it easy on myself - bring him into your bed to fall back to sleep, then if you/DH are still awake once he's in a deeper sleep move him back. If he always wakes then stop trying and just go with it

Do you go back to sleep once he does? If you do, I'd leave it.
If not, you could try that wake to sleep idea, gently rouse him an hour before his clockwork wake, and he should sleep through it, in theory. Do this 3nights in a row to throw off the routine waking. Worth a go?

it will be a phase and it will pass. If you try to fight it too hard, it will probably go on longer.
when my dd was that age she slept on a floor bed because she hated the cot, so I just used to get in with her. Everyone got some sleep.

He may wake up cold. I’d put extra blankets over him when you go to bed and see if their helps.

Does he still take a bottle? Dream feed him at 2am (ie touch the bottle to his bottom lip while he is asleep at this will trigger his reflex to suck the milk while staying asleep) which will hopefully keep him asleep past his normal 2.30am waking time and break the cycle

If you are into alternative therapy 2.30am is when his energy cycle is working on his small intestine so also consider if he has been eating something new affecting his digestion

www.nirvananaturopathics.com/blog/traditional-chinese-organ-body-clock

I think @User0ne has it spot on here. Great advice!

I generally have found that meeting the need as quickly as I could meant the need just vanished. Figuring out the need was the hard part!

I have a 14 month old who started doing this a couple of months ago - the waking, we never put him in our bed - and it has now progressed to it being every few hours all night long. And often needing to be held for up to an hour before can get him sleepy enough to go back in his bed. The lack of sleep is awful, it's like having a tiny newborn again but more stressful because his wailing and screeching is much louder now! I'm assuming this is also separation anxiety, he has been unwell most of the last few months, and had a cough that was disturbing his sleep for months. So I think it's a circle whereby we were needing to comdort him because he was ill/disturbed by cough and now hes not anymore he's got in the habit of being picked up and comforted multiple times a night and is expecting it and feels he needs it. No idea what to do about it though.

I agree with PP that I would try putting an extra layer on at bedtime in case he's waking up cold.

The first time my DD woke up really upset in the night like this she was cold.

If this doesn't work I'd definitely try meddling with the routine by gently stirring him earlier in this sleep cycle to see if it breaks the habit.

Some little kids just need a body to snuggle up to. There's nothing wrong with that.

I always compare these threads to the seperate bedroom threads. Grown adults who can't sleep apart but expect little kids to sleep on their own.