ExP has stopped contact and kept DS

[mummymcphee]

I am looking for advice on how to manage the following situation. My Exp on the last 2 occasions I have gone to collect DS has refused to hand him over. DS is 7 years old and ExP just informs me he doesn't want to come with me and that he is going to take him to the cinema or to see a relative. It has meant that DP has spent 15 days with his dad over Christmas and 3 days and only one night with me. I have been juggling shifts at the hospital but planned to spend 50% of the holiday with my son. I have an older DD who is not my ExP's daughter. I got a text 2 days ago informing me that ExP was also not going to let me see DS this weekend which is my weekend to see him ExP agreed to talk to me tonight at 9.30 to discuss the situation and he is not answering. Do I ignore this behaviour as it cannot go on after the Christmas break as Ex DP has to go back to work. Do I turn up as planned tomorrow to collect my son ? Do I contact the police ? We normally have shared care during term time and we split up 3 years ago. We do not have a consent order as ExDP paid lawyers to draft a draconian document stipulating bedtimes, routine at my house and where and when I could take DS which I refused to sign. The last of contact from ExP is chilling and also he normally spends a lot of time with DD 11 as he is her father figure but he has completely dropped her over Christmas 🥲

I think I would just get a solicitor and look to get contact and arrangements decided in a court order.

You need an emergency court order.
See a solicitor as soon as you can.

What piece of shit he is, sorry you are going through this

As above I would look at getting legal advice and seeing if you can sort something out via court.

keep all the messages and written correspondence of proof he is denying you contact with your son.

Does your ex partner work? Is he likely to send son home when he goes back to work after the break? If so When he returns I would refuse your ex contact and go to court for an arrangement order.

I assume father has parental responsibility??

Text him to day you expect him to have your son ready for you to collect as agreed and if he doesn't you will be seeking legal advice to apply to the court for a contact order.

You could always invite him to mediation to arrange a contact agreement, but with someone like that it sounds as if he would change it a lot. You may be better with a contact order. If he's on the birth certificate, unless you have safeguarding concerns about your son in your ex p's care, the police would not do much, except for a welfare check.

Yes ExP parental responsibility as on the birth certificate. DP left when DS was four. He has a large family who support him with school runs and childcare, cooking, cleaning and he has DS 50% of the time. I struggle a bit to juggle shifts at the hospital and 2DC with limited support but I make it work. Sorry my OP should read I have had DS for 1 night and 3 days over Christmas and he has spent 15 with EXDP