3yo bedtime

mamavl · 2022-12-27T16:46:01+00:00

My 3yr old left his dummies out for the reindeer on Xmas Eve and slept throughout the night. However, naptime and bedtime last night were a fight. He's woken up at 3am the last two nights running and when my husband goes in to him, he screams for me. This afternoon, he's screamed for me and cried himself to sleep. I'm really worried we're scarring him for life.

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SunshineClouds1 · 27/12/2022 16:49

My child still had his dummies at 3 only for sleep.
He knew he wasn't allowed it through the day and it done no harm for sleep. He used to spit it out once asleep, and pop back in through the night if needed.

Original poster

mamavl · 27/12/2022 16:50

SunshineClouds1 · 27/12/2022 16:49

My child still had his dummies at 3 only for sleep.
He knew he wasn't allowed it through the day and it done no harm for sleep. He used to spit it out once asleep, and pop back in through the night if needed.

When did he give them up?

OP posts:

SunshineClouds1 · 27/12/2022 16:51

Not long before his 4th birthday.

Festivez · 27/12/2022 16:51

Hi Op I don't think you have to worry about that does he have a favourite teddy or comforter that wasn't just the dummy.
When I got both my Dcs off dummies I made sure they had other comforts to go to sleep with teddy my DD has flopsy as her comforter.
My DS usually goes to bed with a car in his hand 🤣 the first few nights are always the hardest but they soon Forget about the dummy.
I just would say to my two that the little babies needed the dummies now that your a big girl or big boy.

Original poster

mamavl · 27/12/2022 16:51

SunshineClouds1 · 27/12/2022 16:51

Not long before his 4th birthday.

Did you have to bribe him?

OP posts:

SunshineClouds1 · 27/12/2022 16:52

No we just spoke about it one day and I said the birthday fairies might like to take them and he agreed and that was it.

Original poster

mamavl · 27/12/2022 16:52

Festivez · 27/12/2022 16:51

Hi Op I don't think you have to worry about that does he have a favourite teddy or comforter that wasn't just the dummy.
When I got both my Dcs off dummies I made sure they had other comforts to go to sleep with teddy my DD has flopsy as her comforter.
My DS usually goes to bed with a car in his hand 🤣 the first few nights are always the hardest but they soon Forget about the dummy.
I just would say to my two that the little babies needed the dummies now that your a big girl or big boy.

Yeah, he knows the baby reindeers have them.

It's just the screaming for me when he's in his room... it's honestly like he's being murdered. I'm really worried he'll grow up with abandonment issues.

OP posts:

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 27/12/2022 16:53

What have you replaced the dummies with as a comforter for him?

Original poster

mamavl · 27/12/2022 16:54

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 27/12/2022 16:53

What have you replaced the dummies with as a comforter for him?

He has "cuddly friends" which he always sleeps with.

OP posts:

SecondhandTable · 27/12/2022 17:57

I think give it a few nights and he will probs be over it mostly by then. We had this last Christmas with DD who was 3.5. Left the dummies out on Xmas Eve for Santa in return for 'big girl presents'. Went to bed absolutely fine, we were amazed. The next bedtime, crying her eyes out for her dummies and telling us to ask Santa to take all her presents away and bring her dummies back, my poor girl. It really was upsetting for me and DH so I do get your concerns! She woke a couple of times a night crying for them, this gradually decreased over the following few nights and then it stopped. She had a sleepytot bunny she had always slept with with the dummies attached, so she still had the bunny with her for comfort just without the dummies. After a few nights she was fine and we had no issues.

MolliciousIntent · 27/12/2022 18:21

You're doing the right thing, at 3 he was a good 2 years too old for dummies anyway. Kids are creatures of habit, getting them used to change takes time. If he screams for you at night, go in, give him a kiss and a cuddle and then leave again. If he makes a fuss give him an excuse. You need a wee, or a drink, or to check on Daddy, etc etc etc, and you'll be back in a minute. Then don't go back in until he yells. Rinse and repeat. You'll find he probably falls asleep waiting for you to come back.

Original poster

mamavl · 27/12/2022 18:54

MolliciousIntent · 27/12/2022 18:21

You're doing the right thing, at 3 he was a good 2 years too old for dummies anyway. Kids are creatures of habit, getting them used to change takes time. If he screams for you at night, go in, give him a kiss and a cuddle and then leave again. If he makes a fuss give him an excuse. You need a wee, or a drink, or to check on Daddy, etc etc etc, and you'll be back in a minute. Then don't go back in until he yells. Rinse and repeat. You'll find he probably falls asleep waiting for you to come back.

Sadly I've tried making excuses to leave and after he realises I'm not coming back, that's when the mega kick offs start. He's surprisingly strong willed.

OP posts:

MolliciousIntent · 27/12/2022 19:16

When he kicks off, what do you do? IME if you cave it makes life worse because he learns he's in charge. You need to hold firm until he gets the message.

MolliciousIntent · 27/12/2022 19:17

Also, if he's 3yrs old and you're having night wakes all of a sudden, it might be time to drop the nap.

Mummyinnie · 31/12/2022 03:05

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