8 year old not sleeping

[AWaferThinMint]

Always been a solid sleeper after we taught him to settle down on his own but the last 6-8 weeks have been awful. Can't get to sleep, if he does can't stay asleep all night. He's tired and ratty and so are we.

We have a good routine of downtime before bed (no screen), reading, teeth etc.

We've tried regular checking so he know we're there. We've done a week of returning to bed but that was exhausting.

He says he's worried and has nightmares. We've tried teddies and tonight we've started playing relaxing music.

Please tell me someone has a magic fix. We all need proper sleep again 😭

The sleep is a red herring. You need to identify and deal with whatever it is that's worrying him. School? Friends?

8 is peak age for being scared of the dark. Fairy lights in his room? Let him come into your room on a camp bed for a bit?

Agree, the sleep is a symptom of something else. DD2 has periods of this, I feel for all of you, it is exhausting. There's always a reason, and you can't always 'fix' it. But it passes, eventually. Don't change his bedtime routine, they need to rely on familiar routines to help the anxiety. And just be there and sympathise. I've learned my Dd doesn't always need me to fix things that are worrying her, just sympathise and be there to listen.

Thanks all of you. He's always been a sensitive soul but then not very talkative. I think at this age his sister started worrying about death, but once she dropped off she just slept through.

I like the camp bed idea. I think once we're through Christmas we'll set him up a safe sleep spot next to me and just make him welcome.

For now I'll sleep in with him if he needs me.

Weighted blanket helped us, even if it was just a placebo of "this blanket will help you feel relaxed and help you sleep". We also use audiobooks

when my daughter (same age) went through a few weeks of this, she had worms 😮It’s worth a check as sleep problems are a symptom. When she was able to fall asleep, she wasn’t going in to a deep sleep and was having nightmares. I thought it was just anxiety/ worries. She had no symptoms, besides suddenly being unable to sleep, waking, and doing a lot of evening worrying!

Thanks @Ansumpasty that's delightfully disconcerting but I will check!

@Beanbagtrap I'll look at audio books. We have Apple Music and Alexa so have been trying relaxing music but not helped.

DD(age 9) goes through phases of this. I got her a ‘sleep spray’ (a lavender one I was given from L’Occitane, but I don’t think the branding makes a difference) - and we squirt a few sprays on her pillow and she falls asleep. I’m sure its more a placebo effect as she ‘thinks’ its sending her to sleep, but it works for her.

Another good idea @Falalalalalal thanks