Second baby - struggling with newborn stage

[mzlk]

Hi everyone,

Just want to vent tbh.

I just gave birth to my beautiful baby girl 11 days ago.

It’s my second baby.
I really didn’t enjoy the demanding nature of breastfeeding the first time and am still not enjoying it this time.
I keep nodding off whilst feeding baby which is stressing me out as I don’t even feel the drowsiness coming on.
I don’t remember when it got easier with my first because it was a huge blur.
When will this get easier?!

My baby feeds and sleeps okay but there are times where she just comes off the boob because she’s full but wants to go back on to sleep, but comes back off again because she doesn’t want any milk?!
It has started to take ages to get her to sleep because of this, during the day and also night.
Any advice??

my dd is only 9 weeks so I remember this stage very well! congratulations on your baby. She is still so tiny and will need you a lot for comfort including to sleep. I think after about 3/4 weeks things got marginally easier for me to help my baby find other ways to sleep eg rocking/dummy/pram walk rather than boob. Breastfeeding is really hard! Keep at it if you think you can but if not there is no harm in bottle or combi feeding to share the load. Take each day as it comes and ask for help if you need it

I don’t have any advice sorry, but I just want to show solidarity as I had my second child 4 weeks ago and this shit is hard!

I’m really struggling, I guess it does get easier or people wouldn’t have more children but it’s hard to look ahead when it’s tough right now.

For me it got easier at 3 months and my son is now approaching 6 months and it's generally getting easier each week (except for illness, leaps, sleep regressions....). I had no idea having two would be SO HARD .... How does anyone have 3,4,5????

My second is currently four months and her older sister just turned two. I've found that it's just gotten easier and easier and it's generally a piece of cake now unless the little one is ill (very frequent unfortunately thanks for to the big one's nursery germs.

There was a lot I didn't like about breastfeeding at first but now it's so convenient. I think back to having to get up to make bottles and lug loads of equipment around (oldest was bottle fed) and am glad I stuck with it. Most of the annoying stuff about it has stopped now.

That said, if you feel offering the occasional bottle would help, go for it! Think I might next time the baby has a growth spurt...

11 days was the absolute worst for me with my first, actually stopped breastfeeding for a couple of days because I was finding it so hard. Not sure if they have some kind of leap/growth spurt around the 10/11 day mark but you might even find that things feel a bit better this time next week.
My second is due in the new year though so don't quote me on it!

Was she born on the 8th? My baby was and I've been really struggling the last day or two. She's been more unsettled through the night and just wants to feed feed feed when she's awake. I'm also on antibiotics and I think they're upsetting her stomach as she's really been screaming the last few days and her poo has changed 😭. So can't offer any help but a little solidarity that you're not the only one xx

It's hard OP.

My second is 3 months now and I'm starting to see the light.

We had a very rough first few weeks. What really helped was bedsharing. I just lay next to her with my boob out so she could feed and I could sleep at the same time.

Do you have anyone around to help out with your eldest?

That way you can get some extra sleep during the day.

It'll get easier OP.

Its nice to hear others have felt/gone through the same!

I’m currently up breastfeeding again lol
Seems as though 3 months is when most people notice a bit of a difference… Feels like it’s so far away!!

Also today I’ve noticed my nipples aren’t erect and ready to latch baby on. My room is actually really warm for the first time… wondering if that’s why. But they’ve been hard/erect until today regardless of temperature. Is this normal? I can get them to be hard with stimulation but they’re usually just ready. A bit worried!

Mine are hard or soft depending on the temp or the room so I don't think it's cause for concern but I'm no expert. Is baby still managing to latch? If my nipples aren't playing ball then I squeeze my boob and stuff it into dds mouth, that usually works 🤣

Congratulations on your new baby OP! Two kids is def hard my second is 5 weeks. I second bedsharing so you can safely co-sleep (safe sleep 7 worth a google). I send DH to the spare room for a week so I could get some sleep without worrying about him being in the bed too. I also found I was so used to my arsehole toddler being fed to sleep for her first two years that I was trying too hard to get my second back on the boob to sleep. Actually she will fall asleep being patted on my chest etc. It does get easier I promise!

@rickandmorts yeah she can still latch! I was just wondering why they’ve stopped being rock solid!! But I don’t remember if this happened with my first as well - breastfeeding my first was a huge blur lol

Had a decent night with baby surprisingly! I know it’s all up and down at the moment though so won’t get too hopeful about it continuing yet!