Mum guilt, is this normal?

[CherryBomb87]

I'm not sure if mum guilt is the right term but does anyone feel like they're never enough? I've got two little ones, ages almost two and six months. I'm a lot bigger than I used to be, I've got a lot less energy and I honestly don't know if I'm doing enough or not.

I go to bed early, around 9pm and my husband looks after baby until 930 pm then brings her up to our room. I get up to see to our little boy maybe once or twice in the night when he loses his dummy. I get up with her to do a bottle. I then get up with them around six or seven.

We do a thing in the morning, a walk or music or whatever. He naps around lunch time, I make lunch for us and my husband, in the afternoon we'll try and do chores or play but sometimes we just watch TV (we're getting better at not doing that). I have dinner on the table for 530 - 5 days a week it's usually home cooked (but easy), twice a week it's oven pizza or oven chips.

The house is frequently a bombsite, the laundry is usually clean but in a massive pile on the floor. My husband does bathtime and bed (but I help, taking one while the he takes the other) and washes up every night. I don't actively play with kids as much as I should.

I get to the end of the day and just ask myself if I could genuinely have done more. Would it be so hard to put away the laundry? Tidy a bit? But then I think - the only time I've got left is my one hour of telly at night or my sleep! Where would that time come from?

Is it common to think like this? Am I actually just lazy? I ask because it's really hitting my self esteem hard.

Oh and my kids aren't the chill kind - I've been interrupted 4 times writing this! The toddler needs so much more attention than the other kids in nct (except one). I've tried letting him just play and all he wants is mummy (or to explore plug sockets and the toilet).

You're not a bad mum AT ALL!!! Honestly with two little ones, this is the hardest stage. My husband calls it "survival mode" and honestly it sounds like you're more than surviving. I have 3 kids, 4yo, 3yo and 3 week old and your life sounds a lot like mine. More screen time than I'm really comfortable with, always playing catch up with housework and always feeling like I should have played with the kids a bit more. We also average two days a week of freezer food but I don't feel bad about this when I cook from scratch the rest of the week. I think as long as you're getting out the house for a bit most days and they're having mostly healthy balanced meals and they're warm, fed, loved and cared for then you're doing fine. Don't let all the perfect Insta mummies make you feel like a failure, don't compare your everyday to someone else's highlight reel

I have 2 children. One who is 5 so is at school now and a one year old. Second baby was a big shock, my house is a mess and my washing is never ending now! I have lowered my exceptions and I'm happier for it.

Sounds like you are doing a great job! They won't be small for long so embrace the chaos

A mess house does not make a bad Mum. For me everything is so difficult when you are awake during the night with children. There is a reason sleep deprivation is a torture method. Your children are very young and it sounds like you are doing an amazing job. My youngest is 3 and in school nursery 3 hours a day and I don’t work but only know do I feel like things are starting to get better. In reality it has slowly gotten better over the last year. For me 3 really is much easier than 2 and 4 is even easier and 3. It will get easier.