Putting baby down to nap - help!

[evajem]

My baby is 7 weeks old and I’m totally failing at putting him down for nap! It works if I push him out on pram on in carrier, otherwise I don’t know how to put him down at home. I can nurse him to sleep but then he doze off and wakes up soon. Does any one have clear instructions on how to put them down to sleep in their cot? Do I just go for it and let there be a bit of crying? Thanks so much for your advice!

I’m on baby number two. Still never managed to put a baby down for a nap. Now I embrace it, get a stock of coffee, biscuits, I pad and happily sit for hours ignoring everything else. I feed to sleep and let him snooze on me. Works until I have both kids on my own, then it’s carnage!

Adjust your expectations, because they're pretty unreasonable. Do some research on the 4th trimester. Babies that small are biologically programmed to want to be close to you. Get a sling and something good on Netflix and accept that for the next 4ish months at least, naps will take place on you.

When my babies were there that young I had to feed them to sleep or rock to sleep and then hold them for about 20 minutes until you could tell they were in a deep sleep, then put them in the cot. It worked about 70 percent of the time. The rest of the time I just had to start over.

I think it gets easier if you just accept for the first couple of months you won’t sleep much and just have to go with the flow.

Unrealistic, sorry, not unreasonable!

I occasionally managed it by leaning right into the Moses basket as lowered the sleeping baby in then switching the pressure of my body on baby’s torso for hands on torso after a minUte then very slowly removing them.

You aren't supposed to put them aside to sleep. Well, as far as they are concerned, anyway.

As a survival mechanism, your baby is going to stir, call or cry whenever he feels you move away. So stay with him.

This is a few months out of your life. Meet your baby's needs.

My baby is 7 weeks, and I have an older one. I cannot put the baby down to nap and I don't think I could with the older one for months (it's a bit of a blur). I just put him in the sling or sit and feed and hold him. You might get various tips like swaddle, warm the cot , use a dummy, give them a big bottle of formula (?!). They might work, you can try, but honestly a lot of babies just want to be held and there isn't much routine at this stage. I'll probably start trying a bit more consistently on naps around the 3-4 month mark but even so I reckon my little girl was 6 months plus before she napped in a cot. I would also be pretty impressed if baby fell asleep after being left to cry for a bit in the cot but you do hear of magic babies who "self settle" at a few weeks old.

A word of advice...don't take a face value what people tell you about how their baby slept, it's hard to remember several years later and I think people often have memories of their babies sleeping loads in cots when that actually came later.

I just let mine sleep on me. once he was a bit older I would feed him to sleep with a blanket on me so I could transfer him to a nest in the floor without him waking but that didn't always work! Embrace it have a drink, bus uits and the remote nearby and rest!

The baby is only 7 weeks. Just hold them for now and rest. Things change all the time.

At 7 weeks don’t expect too much, you’re doing nothing wrong.

I’ve got a 2 year old and an almost 3 month old atm and the youngest has spent so much time in the sling, it’s been a godsend with a toddler.honestly just enjoy the cuddles for now. I got so worked up about my first having to have a perfect sleep schedule but it did come in time but that was only after months of me thinking I was doing something wrong and lots of tears! If they’re not sleeping at all at night without being held that’s a bit more difficult to manage but hopefully as you only mentioned naps you’re getting a bit of a break at night.

7 weeks? Sorry, I wasn’t routinely putting DC down for a nap until more like 7 months. All sling/car/buggy/held until that point.

7 weeks = I want to cuddle my mother constantly.

I have a 7 week old, almost 8 weeks. I use a sling which allows me to get some things done around the house & make a coffee etc. I've accepted to enjoy all the cuddles and contact naps, I'll never get them again!

My baby is 9 months and still can’t be put down for a nap 🤣
I’ve learn to enjoy it tho and it’s acc my favourite part of the day when he naps because I snuggle up in bed with him on my chest and watch documentaries whilst snacking.
At 7 weeks baby needs to be close to you. Defo don’t recommend ‘letting him cry for a bit’ I think that’s cruel.

Thank you so much! Your sharing helps a lot. I had a really easy 2nd baby and it was in hk summer so the bedding wasn’t so cold when she was put down so she stayed asleep a lot more (but my memory can be warped). so I must have been projecting the expectation from that experience.

now I feel more ready to accept it and enjoy it and go with the flow.

So may I ask what you do at night time then when you are also needing some sleep and can’t hold / carry them through the sleep? Thank you!

At night time I would persevere with putting them down in the cot/Next2Me/Moses basket and try swaddling (lots of sleeping bag swaddles available including warm ones) and maybe white noise. Otherwise you have to take turns with your partner so you can get some sleep. Some people will suggest co-sleeping although it never suited me personally.

My DD (5.5 months) still contact naps during the day but was able to sleep overnight (first in Moses basket then Next2Me) with a Love to Dream swaddle.

Parent of two and I have no fucking idea. It didn’t work for me until I cuddled them in bed and then wriggled away when they were a year old and even then that could be hit or miss.

Personally I'm cosleeping, appreciate it's not everyone's thing.

Same we co slept. Husband on a mattress on the floor as we had no spare room. Duvet on me and dangling off the bed. A blanket just on the baby.

It's not for everyone but it's how I coped.

I've a near 3mo who does 2 morning naps in his cot... most days...

Start with trying to put LO down for the 1st nap in the morning only. I read that's the easiest one to tinker with, supposedly due to their night time sleep hormones still being present or something. I also started on that one because if it goes wrong you have all day to recover sleep and hopefully hopefully not impact the precious overnight kips...

My nap routine is: once LO is tired, I feed him, double check to see he's sleepy and move to the bedroom. The blind stays shut all the time so it's as dark as I can get it. I put on the night light, even though in the daytime I doubt he notices it. I also put on white noise which stays on for the duration of his nap. I nurse him again, burp him, dress him in his sleeping bag, bounce or nurse depending on how ready he is for a nap. Then when he's conked, I hold him horizontally to check he's conked, then slowly move him into his cot. I put him down bum 1st and make sure there's a small muslin square that smells of me near his nose. (Midwife recommended doing it and I wear several in my bra all day...) My LO also likes to be at the side of the cot, not the middle, I think it's a contact thing, like the cot is too big and scary in the middle or something.

He rustles when I put him down and it takes a few (read several) rounds of picking him up, bouncing, checking he's conked before he's asleep and settled. He then naps for... usually 40 minutes. Oh, and sometimes he rustles only a little and doesn't need picked up, it's like he's just fussing and getting comfy so that's a careful balancing act as well...

It took a while for this all to work, so persevere and find what works for you two. And know you have all day to recover if LO only goes down for a minute or two to start with.

I'm still working on nap 2, it's hit or miss. The rest of his naps are on me and longer but it's enough to allow me to shower and grab a coffee most days which is honestly bliss even if showers are rushed when my partner is out.

I'd like not to nurse him to sleep and I still laugh at the whole "put them down drowsy". I also hope that one day he'll nap longer in his cot because I do still think he spends a lot of the afternoon catching up on sleep. But you win some and lose some.

Hope something from this helps! I know how much just a few minutes to yourself matter!

Thank you for more sharing - it’s a good feeling to know it’s normal. I think I did get influenced by some baby sleep articles and also my own selective memory.
thanks therookiemum for your detailed account!! It made me smile how many details we need to pay attention to there like bum first :). Thanks for the tip on mum smell muslins!

@TheRookieMum I'm also going to give your explanation a go!

If he was 7 MONTHS, I would say let there be a bit of crying. At 7 WEEKS he's still adjusting to being on the outside. Do whatever you need to to get him to drift off. I BF and he nodded off while latched. Slings worked well too, for when he was having a meltdown and couldn't be placated.

At around 4-ish months you can start to think about naps in bed