Feeding advice

[Lucban]

Am I being evil?
My baby is 11 days old, I give him a bottle every 3 to 4 hours. I give him 4oz sometimes he drinks all of it and sometimes he drinks anything from 2,50 to 3oz. Sometimes he really cries out after 2 hours of having a bottle, I try everything like nappy changing, changing different positions to hold him in and usually it works. I really try to wait out until at least 3 hours for his next feed because I don't want him to get into a routine of having it every 2 hours. It doesn't happen very often where he's fussy hes usually pretty good at having the bottle about 3 and half hours after the last one. I think he just had an off day yesterday but I felt like my partners parents were judging me they said "give him a bottle" after I literally gave him a bottle an hour ago I don't want to give him a bottle every time he cries is that being evil? Am I doing the right thing?

was he displaying hunger cues? The nhs advice is to feed on demand initially rather than a rigid schedule. Their tummies are so little.

I wouldn't say you're being evil but my DS didn't get to three hours between bottles for months and months. I remember my HV saying I should try and stretch them out a bit more but she didn't have to deal with the crying baby. I tried it once and then decided that life was too short for that so just fed on demand.

You're misguided.
Their tummies are tiny. Feeding for them is way more than just eating, it's bonding, warmth, familiarity, security, thirst. They will digest milk at different speeds.

Follow hunger cues and pace feed. Do not make them finish a bottle. Your baby does not know it's on a schedule. As their tummy grows and interest in the world grows they will find their own schedule

As PP says their stomachs are still tiny at that stage and they still need to feed frequently so you should be offering a bottle if they seem hungry. They can also go through growth spurts and feed even more frequently. My DD is already 5 months and she still feeds every 2-3 hours during the day. I have tried offering slightly larger bottles but she can still only handle about 5 oz at a time.

Babies should be fed on demand, would you want to wait 3 hours if you were still thirsty or hungry? Maybe not evil but pretty mean, he’s brand new fgs.

Thank you for the advice. It only happened yesterday that he was upset. He has honestly been absolutely amazing, I have to wake him for feeds! He has formula milk not breast milk, the formula milk keeps him full like I said 3 to 4 hours.

Congratulations on your baby

He's very new, so it will take a while for him to settle in . You're doing great.

Every mother finds her own way, and her way is the best way for her and her baby. When the mother/carer is relaxed and confident her baby picks that up from her.

My way, learned from my (ex-midwife) mother, was regular routine with regular feeds.

If he’s crying to be fed then he really should be fed! 11 days old is too young to be put on a feeding schedule.

Babies to cry far reasons other than hunger. Have you tried a dummy, sometimes they just want to suck for comfort. But if I’d exhausted everything else as a possibility including being tired and needing to sleep, then yes I would obviously offer another feed but it wouldn’t be my first thought when I’d literally just fed them. It’s also helpful to remember that generally they need 2.5oz of formula per lb of body weight in a 24 hour period. But I never needed to feed mine more frequently than every 3 hours either.

He's 11 days old, forget how long he "should" be going between feeds and just feed him when he wants it. You really can't leave an 11 day old baby crying for milk just because you don't want to feed him after 2 hours.

I've looked at my feeding chart and I'm actually feeding him every 3 hours give or take. But I also noticed he only did 1 poop yesterday which isn't like him.

I just want to say thank you to the people who have reassured me and been so kind.
Although some of you have made me feel like shit so cheers for that too 👍🏽 I am a first time mom and I'm still learning so please keep that in mind when you're giving people advise instead of judging them.

I wouldnt use the word evil, just maybe mis-informed. Babies that small need to be fed on demand. They won't always feed frequently, as they get older it will get longer between feeds. My baby currently goes anything from 1 to 5 hours between feeds depending on if she's thirsty / hungry / needing milk for comfort etc. Times will space eventually.

Knew I shouldn't have read this thread 😭

Congratulations on your new baby!!

It’s so difficult to figure out what baby needs when they can’t tell us, especially when they’re only a few weeks old! It sounds like you’re just figuring out the best way for your baby, which 11 days in is pretty much par for the course I think. I don’t know if I’ve ever truly figured it out to be honest haha!

There are some great feeding accounts in Instagram that I found super helpful (and still do) - feedeatspeak and olivialactationconsultant - they’re both qualified consultants who work/have worked for the NHS so very much trusted sources!

I know my own little one rarely went 3 hours between feeds until he was 4+ months old, but every baby is different! But I certainly wouldn’t worry too much about over feeding baby, or baby coming to think they’ll get fed whenever they cry at this stage, they don’t know their arse from their elbow when they’re this little haha so they definitely can’t get their heads around crying for something they want but don’t need, so if you think he might be hungry I’d personally just give it a try and see if he feeds! We all have days we’re hungrier than others, and especially babies who have growth spurts etc.

But also, screw family who make you feel bad, just do your best and focus on what you need to do to take the best care of your baby x

I think my question is your logic/motivation... you say you "don't want him to get into a routine of feeding every 2 hours". Where has this come from? Why don't you want him feeding that often? Because sticking to that schedule above everything else (including baby crying) at 11 days old is not healthy. So, you definitely aren't evil, but like PPs have said, you seem misinformed, and I'd suggest that wherever you got that line about 2 hours from, you ignore it. Your beautiful baby is so tiny and needs to be fed and comforted on demand. There's a time for routines, but 11 days is not it