Questions about daily schedules

[DaisyChristmasBauble]

Mum to a beautiful and amazing but very strong willed 8 month old here. We have a very loose routine of wake-up between 7-8am, a large morning bottle, 3 solids meals and a smaller bottle during day, 2 naps which can vary in length but I never allow any nap to extend 2 hours, bedtime around 8pm. She settles well at bedtime usually and has started to do a good stretch, but then we experience a split night usually from 2-4am. From googling in the small hours, it’s suggested that this is usually caused by mismatch between sleep pressure and circadian rhythm and can be helped by a schedule. Which brought me to looking at suggested schedules for her age.

My questions I guess:

1. Most schedules are from 7am - 7pm. Is there a scientific reason for this? As a family, 8pm bedtime works best so that DH can spend a bit of time with her after he gets in from work. Could this be our problem, does she need to be going to bed earlier?
2. Following on from above, can I take any schedule and just move each item 1 hour on to get to the 8pm bedtime?
3. What do people on schedules do if they’re out and about? DD will sleep in car seat or pram, but usually these naps won’t be anywhere near as long as she can nap at home.
4. How does the schedule work if she won’t eat for example at the suggested time, or wakes earlier than expected from a nap?
5. Do I need to follow a strict schedule to crack her split nights or does anyone have any other suggestions?

Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read and help out a clueless FTM.

Typo in first post - split nights are from 2-5am* I know it’s not awful, but I struggle to get back to sleep after being up for 3 hours. She initially wakes happy then gets crosser and crosser when she realises we aren’t getting up for the day, and this continues until the wake window ends I suppose?

Good question and im keen to read answers also. Sorry I cant help as im expectant ftm. Where did you read about sleep schedules (if you dont mind me asking please)?

I think the 7am to 7pm schedule could easily be 8am to 8pm. If you have other kids, or want evening for the adults, a 7pm bedtime sounds good.

There are so many variables... i sleep trained dd1 and it really just went on and on, she was a terrible sleeper. Teething, coughs and colds, not enough fresh air in the daytime, over-tired, nap too late in the afternoon, growth spurt/hungry, developmental leap, lost the dummy in the cot, rolled over and kicked the side of the cot and woke herself up, stood up in her sleep and then fell over... the list just never ends!

My best tip is when they wake at night, don't pander to them. Keep it dark, talk as little as possible, try not to bring them into bed with you or walk/cuddle them back to sleep. It can be hard of they are screaming the house down though but you want them to learn that when they wake up just turn over and go back to sleep. Then they can wake as much as they like, can't they :)

Hi OP. I think you’re doing really well to have an eight-month-old who only wakes once in the night. Mine didn’t sleep through reliably until 12 months and 2 years respectively. I wouldn’t force it

1 - maybe. I found this site helpful www.babysleepsite.com/baby-sleep-patterns/baby-insomnia-split-night-why-and-how-to-fix/ also using Huckleberry app for wake windows and suggested schedules for age, it was worth every penny for us to pay for the wake window function that tells you when next sleep/bedtime will be.
2-yes
3-maybe fit your life round theirs short term til split night is fixed then find a balance from there. Shorter naps might not necessarily be a bad thing see article in 1.
4 offer food at consistent times, let them eat or refuse, they'll settle into schedule. Use wake windows through the day but a consistent wake time. This worked for us.
5 see 1
Hope that helps, it's only from my experience and what I learned from Google/MN, good luck.

Thanks everyone for the replies! I think I’ll try to tweak a schedule to be 8-8 to see how it works, if it doesn’t I’ll gradually bring it forward to 7-7. Last night was horrendous, multiple wake ups 🥴 I know on here everyone says sleep is linear, they don’t sleep through until much later but among my real life friends who have similar ages babies, they all seem to have dream
babies who have slept through since they were about 3 months, never seem to have regressions etc! Not sure how honest they’re being though because surely it can’t just be me?!

@Choc2022 I just googled “sleep schedules for 8 month old” what I would say though is for the first few months really don’t worry about schedules, there are so many changes then and they feed on demand really during that time. I went with the flow and it worked well, still isn’t terrible but with solids etc to factor in now I need help with timings. This is me only just considering it now before I head back to work in a couple of months. Just enjoy that early stage good luck for your new arrival!

My son did this with the split nights, it was horrendous. Caved, got a grande sleepyhead (the one for 8-36months) and it got much better. Still had an early start but 5am suddenly isn't that bad when the alternative is being up for 2hrs in the middle of the night! I know they aren't recommended for overnight sleep but he was a chunky wee man who could already crawl and I felt was unlikely to suffocate himself. Got it secondhand cos I couldn't face spending £200 on something that might not work, but given its magical powers I wouldn't have minded shelling out that much.

I think most babies need to go to bed at 7pm, but mine never has! He was about 8 or 9pm due to feeding times, and even now at 18 months he's doing really well with a 7:30 bedtime. I would suggest that if 8pm is working for you both, crack on. If there are problems, think about bringing forward.

Schedules aren't supposes to be rigid, so you do need the flexibility of going out and about. I tended to try and be home for the longer lunchtime nap to have it in bed, but all other naps can be done on the go more easily. Even if it's not a long nap, the point is some sleep has been attained

I would also advise that you shouldn't change your life to fit around a schedule. Change a schedule to fit around your life. The most important thing really is sleep times and awake windows - babies can only tolerate so much sleep in a 24 hour period, but different babies have different sleep needs.

At 8 months honestly I'd suggest having a shorter morning nap (30-40 minutes) and longer afternoon nap of 2-2 1/2 hours