What can I do with my baby?!

[caramellattelove]

Dd is nearly 10 months and our days are pretty dull.

I talk to her a lot, narrating what I'm doing, asking her 'questions' etc. She loves books so I read to her. But I feel like I don't know how to play with her 😞 she doesn't have the level of understanding required to do a lot of things.

She'll sit and explore her toys (feel them, pass them between her hands, shake them, push them away/pull them closer, fiddle with moving parts etc. I can sit there for a bit and do those things too (while telling her about them e.g 'look this bit spins round'). Sometimes we'll pass toys back and forth or I might make a teddy talk to her. But I don't really know what else to do with her and we both get quite bored in the day.

I've got the Kinedu app which gives me daily activities to do with her that help development, but there's only a couple of activities a day and they don't take up much time at all. We occasionally go out for a walk but it's getting pretty cold so I'm often not very up for it. I made her a treasure basket which she does like to rummage through, but it's fairly brief and I think she's not as interested in the things in it now (any suggestions for more items that can go in a treasure basket would be much appreciated).

I'm just feeling quite bored, I can tell she is too. And I want to spend time with her and 'do' things but I just don't know what?! Really hoping others might have some suggestions of things they do that I haven't thought of. I appreciate any suggestions, thank you

It’s harder in the winter as outdoor activities are more limited. Mine both loved those space blanket things at that age, sensory type activities like playing with cooked spaghetti, water play, finger painting, musical instruments (or just banging saucepans with a spatula!)

wrap up warm and go for a walk to look at some Christmas lights, swings at the park, if you have a library close by a lot of them do a free baby rhyme session that mine loved, or childrens centres and churches often do a free stay and play with new toys and other children to keep them occupied

if funds allow, swimming is a good one for the winter, or a baby group like baby sensory

to be honest though, babies don’t need a huge amount - most of that stuff is for the parents rather than the babies! It sounds like you are doing a great job

Have you looked for local groups? Most library's do bounce and rhyme or a lot go places have sparkler play groups.

Baby massage is a nice one, or music bugs?

I’ve got a 9 month old and we try to get out every day. She loves watching people, being nosy and so even a bus ride or trip round lidl keeps her engrossed. I’ve taken her swimming (floating) this week and tomorrow I’m meeting a friend at a playgroup which is free. Yesterday we went down to the beach and just had a walk.

Toys wise we have some silicone building blocks which I build and she knocks down. We were given one of those fisher price toys that sings and she plays with that, pushes the buttons. I read to her. We have some wooden animals and she’ll chew on one while I move the others and make the noises. Most of these games only last 10 mins or so which is why I find it so important to get out somewhere to break up the day. I leave her on the floor rolling around and crawling while I put the washing away or do chores. She’s getting one Of those tunnels to crawl through for Christmas which I think she’ll love.

It is hard though and the days can be long which is why I find it such a lifesaver to get out. Do you drive?

Spend time wandering around Christmas shops, they love the lights and colours. Add in lunch for baby and a coffee for you and you can easily stretch it out to 2 hours, even longer if they have an aquarium shop!

I survived by signing up for 2 different baby groups and swimming. If you can afford it, it gives you a bit of structure to your day - also might be some free groups like library bounce and rhyme sessions. Do you have a garden? We got a mini swing and that used to kill 20 minutes a day even in winter if you wrap them up. It is boring doing hours of playing. I found breaking up the day made it better so you don’t have a long afternoon of it. We did:
7 breakfast
7:45 shower and dress both of us
9 naptime
10 out the door for walk or group
11:30 lunch
12:30 - here’s where we might play inside for a bit
2 naptime and milk
3 snacktime
4ish back in buggy for a mini walk to kill time to dinner or in swing in garden
4:30 dinner
5:15 playtime and start looking at clock for husband to come home!!
6 husband home and plays a bit with baby whilst we do dinner for us
6:30 bath baby
7 baby in bed

As other posters have said, normal life is fascinating for little ones. If you’re bored, chuck a podcast on in the background? That’s saved my sanity on many a long Duplo building session.

I'd start looking for baby groups to go to, to get you out of the house and talking to adults if anything else. In terms of indoor activities, pans with a wooden spoon was a favourite (although noisey!), bowls of pasta and lentils for them to feel and play with, pop up books, playing peek a boo, pretend tea parties with dolls/stuffed toys (not that it made any sense to her at 10 months but she enjoyed in nonetheless!), finger painting. Going for walks or to the play park, you just have to wrap up warm. Babies are rather dull and it can be boring but I found getting myself out, especially when I didn't feel like it, really helped us both.

We did something every day with my 2nd, 3rd and 4th child as we had to get up and out for the school run twice a day so that gave us some structure but with my first I remember feeling so guilty for feeling bored. Try to find toddler groups, swimming, classes, libraries. Try to get out at least once a day every day.

you do need to get out of the house. A walk, a trip into town for a coffee, a baby group, a soft play, the park... it doesn't matter, but it helps the time to go and the baby will enjoying seeng and hearing and smelling new things.

I quite often just got on the bus, went into town (I drive, but DC loved the bus so it was a fun trip), wondered around a bit, possibly did a few minor chores like buying bread and milk.

Garden centres this time of year are amazing! And often have coffee shops.

Babies are gorgeous and cute and we adore them but it IS boring for adults all day everyday! You are doing a great job. Having other adults to mix with helps massively as they fuss over the baby and you can have a catch up. It takes the intensity away and time flys by. So invite people round or go and meet them somewhere.

Thanks so much for suggestions 😊

We do the school run most mornings (dd1 is in year 6 so occasionally walks herself to school) and sometimes walk up to our local shops after and I get a coffee but that obviously costs a fair bit if you're doing it every day. And it doesn't take up much time. But I keep thinking I should stop in the park on the walk home so I'll try and start doing that.

We do go to rhyme time which she really enjoys. And after we have a wander in town. Unfortunately there's only 1 other free baby group locally (children's centre), but I should go to that one as well.

She loves the water so we were trying to go swimming regularly but I find swimming so unappealing in the winter as I get cold very easily! I also find it stressful getting changed after as she will scream while getting dry and dressed (she's the same after a bath). Definitely something we'd do regularly when it warms up though.

We did a baby massage course when she was about 5 months but now she's on the move I don't think she'd have the patience for it.

I do drive but she hates the car so I find travelling with her quite stressful :( there's a lovely garden centre not too far though so will do a trip there. I don't have a lot of spare money though and I feel like apart from a walk, or going to the park (which she obviously can't do much in), everything else out requires at least money for a coffee and it adds up :(

We live in a flat and so kind of have a garden, but it's tiered with steps and big ledges so it's not really child friendly! I do sometimes put her in the Walker in the car park area outside (it's safer than it sounds!) which she enjoys for a bit.

I think I'd be less worried about what to do if she was a chilled baby and happy sitting and playing. But she's quite highly strung, she gets upset/cross a lot, doesn't enjoy sitting and playing for long and seems to get bored very quickly. So feel like I need more ideas for things to do to keep her happy. Thanks so much everyone x

I would suggest finding some sort of activities you can attend together. These don't have to be paid activities. When I was on maternity leave I found it important for my mental health to get out the house and have some sort of routine. Even if this was just a couple of days a week. I would take baby to a nursery rhymes thing at the library once a week, followed by a breastfeeding club library (you don't have to be breastfeeding to attend these btw). You can also just take them to the library any day and just read books or let them explore the baby section. Our local library has some toys for the babies and kids which is great.

Then another day I would go to a mothers and "toddlers" group, where I was surprised that loads of babies attended too. This was brilliant as they had a little routine, open play, some sort of organised craft or activity (my baby was too young for this at the time, but I could have done it with them to be honest), then a snack, song time, and off we go home for a nap! I could have attended a different group of this sort every day of the week if I wanted, every village around me seems to have a group on various days, but I found that just once a week for this activity suited me.

Like a PP said, these things are usually for the parents rather than for the babies. But I did find that it helped baby to have activities out of the house and see other people and kids. My little one would have a brilliant nap after any of these activities, most of which only usually lasted an hour max!

If you have the extra money to spend, swimming or baby gymnastics are brilliant too. The gymnastics at that age usually just involve you helping them / letting them crawl around different activities, it's not an actual class. There's loads of baby sensory classes on too.

You also say that all baby does is pull toys towards them and feel them etc, that's pretty normal at that age! Also, you don't have to actually be sitting with them all the time while they do this, it's good for them to do this alone sometimes (of course you're still in the room with them). It doesn't always have to be toys as well, you can put some empty boxes in front of them or some pots and pans a ladle and they'll get on with it for a bit while you get on with something else you would like to do or just take a rest. There's loads of ideas on instagram for activities for babies, different things you can set up for them etc and just let them get on with exploring and playing alone. You can read books with them.

I think the important thing if you are bored and baby is appearing bored too is to mix it up every day. Don't do the same thing every single day, work around your normal routine with different at home activities and out and about activities.

Oh also, our local soft play lets under 1s in for free! If you have this, definitely take advantage until she turns 1!

Baby groups
soft play
swimming
trips to the park to play on the swings
wrap her and yourself up warm and go for some long walks
pop to a cafe for lunch
go to the library and read some books to her
window shopping
long walks looking at the Christmas lights

Winter is definitely harder. I did rhyme time and another music class with DS when he was that age. Did a lot of visiting people as he was very interested in public transport and all the things passing by the window. Spent lots and lots of time at our local library generally, which had a very long sofa perfect for him to cruise along. I also did a lot of cooking with him in the sling, which he seemed to like and made me feel like I was doing something useful. Many long long walks with us both bundled up.

I don't remember much playing to be honest! I built towers for him to knock down. That might have been it.

I feel for you. I remember the U1 days being quite boring. I had to make plans to do something outside each day for my sanity. Walk, drive to lake and walk round, soft play, meet friends, go into town, rhyme time things, baby groups. It's monotonous and boring, especially in the winter when it's cold and there's not much daylight.

If you're worried about her being bored, have you had a look at play hurray? She's on fb and Instagram. Early years teacher with loads of free/cheap activity/play/learning ideas for all stages.

Google the name of your local council and then "Family Information Service". Ask them for a list of all playgroups in your Borough.

In my borough, they emailed me a list of everything we had locally and it was fantastic...really comprehensive.

They broke it down into each town too, so was easy to see the closest ones.

Might also be worth ringing your local childrens centre to see if they have anything going on. I think they went very targeted in who they helped about 10 years ago, but depending on your area they may still have some free for all sessions.