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Parenting

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Original poster

Friend wants me to take her kid without a car seat

25 replies

Londonmum20222022 · 26/11/2022 11:58

Hi All,

I have two car seats in the back for my 2- and 3-year-old. My friends wants me to take her 3-year-old to a party. I can't get another car seat in the middle.

I feel I am being rude saying no

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dementedpixie · 26/11/2022 12:00

Are they in a forward facing seat and would there be a space in the front for them?

Soggydog · 26/11/2022 12:01

Absolutely right to refuse to have a 3 year old in the back without a seat. It is only allowed in case of an emergency which this isn't. If you really did want to take the child they could go in the front with airbag off and on a carseat?

SheWoreYellow · 26/11/2022 12:01

I’d say put her child in the front.

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RedElephants · 26/11/2022 12:01

That's a firm no from me.

bloodywhitecat · 26/11/2022 12:01

No, you are the driver and if anything happened it would be on your conscience for the rest of your life. The likelihood of an accident is small but it is not one I would want to take. Can you fit a seat in the front?

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 26/11/2022 12:02

Don't do it, not worth the risk of a terrible accident, and you as the driver would be held responsible.

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 26/11/2022 12:03

Why cant you put her car seat in the front passenger seat?

RedElephants · 26/11/2022 12:03

Don't compromise yourself

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 26/11/2022 12:03

And has she said no car seat is fine? Or are you presuming that?

Matilda1981 · 26/11/2022 12:03

If there isn’t space for three car seats in the back of a car a child doesn’t actually have to be in a car seat as long as they are over 3. I personally wouldn’t have a problem for a short distance - alternatively put the child in the front.

GrazingSheep · 26/11/2022 12:03

You’d feel worse than rude if anything happened,

BeanieTeen · 26/11/2022 12:04

Definitely not. Obviously there’s a high chance everything will be fine. But if the police pull you over it’s on you, not your friend. A bit shitty of her to try and put you this position.

upfucked · 26/11/2022 15:18

It’s illegal. Tell her you can’t afford the £500 fine.

dementedpixie · 26/11/2022 15:19

It isn't actually illegal if there isn't room for a 3rd seat in the back. But nevertheless it's not exactly safe or recommended

dementedpixie · 26/11/2022 15:21

When three child restraints cannot be fitted in the rear

If it is not possible to fit three child restraints in the rear of a car, then two children up to 135 cm in height must travel in child seats and the third child may use an adult seat belt on its own. This exemption does not apply to children under 3 years old.

It may be better for the third child to sit in a child restraint in the front rather than use the adult seat belt in the rear. If there is an active passenger airbag, check with the vehicle manufacturer or the handbook about using a child restraint in the front. If you do, move the front seat as far back as possible on its runners.

A rearward facing baby seat must not be used in the front if there is an active front airbag.

Ponderingwindow · 26/11/2022 15:30

for A 3 year old, not unless you are fleeing a forest fire, a tsunami, or an ax murderer.

TidyDancer · 26/11/2022 15:32

Is there a reason you can't have her in the front? It would seem such an obvious solution I presume there is a reason. If you can't do that then clearly YANBU.

autienotnaughty · 26/11/2022 15:34

Car seat in front of airbag is off otherwise NO

KnittedCardi · 26/11/2022 15:47

Front seat is fine, in a car seat, with airbags off. I had a two seater for quite a while with my DC's, so no other option, but it is perfectly legal.

Jules912 · 26/11/2022 21:23

Does she know you're taking your 2 year old too? I have a couple of friends we sometimes share taking LO's to parties, and friends child goes in the car seat if whichever of my children isn't invited, so could she be assuming something like that.
It's only very recently I've been willing to take both my kids and a friend's, and that's because DS has finally reached 135cm.

Dimmer76 · 27/11/2022 01:53

I have refused to take my nieces in the car because we didn't have the correct car seats. It is just not worth the risk. Not for you, the kids, or your license if you get stopped or, god forbid, involved in a accident

BertieBotts · 29/11/2022 10:05

Could she look after the 2yo and you put her child in their seat?

If not, YANBU to say no.

Smogtopia · 29/11/2022 10:19

Legalities aside one major reason people don't put 3 year olds in a seat with just a seat belt as they very often aren't mature enough to not wiggle / play / slide under the belt and free up their top half (if not full body) with three kids in the car on the way to a party that's a serious factor in how safe this journey would be. Just because something is legal doesn't mean it's a safe and sensible choice

CatherineNotSoMuch · 29/11/2022 10:26

I'd say no and wouldn't have her in the front either as I'd not be sure of her behaviour. My nephew travelled in the front, legally in a car seat, and was a nightmare distraction with trying to touch everything.

Stickmansmum · 29/11/2022 10:31

Put child in the front as people suggest, in a car seat with airbag off.

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