Games consoles - what age did your DC get one?

[NameChange30]

DS is 5 and in Y1. His two best friends (same age) have games consoles, and when he goes to their houses the boys just want to play with them. I am not hugely precious about screen time - I let DS watch tv most days although we do limit it. But I feel very uneasy about a games console. I think it's because DS is pretty obsessed with screens as it is (will pester us for TV/tablet and has to be managed very carefully as he sometimes has meltdowns when we take it away). I worry that games are more addictive and will lead to even more meltdowns if he gets frustrated etc. But then if others have them I wonder if I'm being precious?! And I wonder how long I can hold out before I have to let DS have one?!

FYI in case it's relevant, I think DS has ASD and/or ADHD, but a long way of diagnosis since I'm fighting for a referral for assessment atm. However, I'm curious to know what any parents have done including parents of both neurotypical and neurodiverse children.

A long way off diagnosis. Gah.

Honest advice - stay clear. The meltdowns aren't worth it.

My DC were aged 9, 11 and 13 when they got their first console (a Switch). I know that was fairly late compared to their friends though (especially for the eldest). Mine are all NT.

ASD child here, he's 9.5 and we've just got this one, altho not used it yet so maybe my post is no help but I'll be watching this thread. This is a tricky area to navigate particular for those with ND kids and most parents I've met whose children are NT just do not understand.

Two boys, no special needs, we held out until the oldest was 10 I think. He has plenty of access to an iPad before that so could play Minecraft and Fortnite.

5 seems really really young. iPad can at least be put out of sight, out of mind for a while, unlike a console which is really engrossing (and designed to be so)

Oh and we got them a PlayStation. Switch / Nintendo do seem to be designed more for family / child use though.

I noticed a cocomelon video game has recently come out so people must be buying consoles for very young children/toddlers given that’s the age it’s aimed at (under 5s)

Never. It never seemed to be an issue. I think they are more negative than positive so we just didn't.

We’re bending this Christmas and getting a switch for my eldest who is eight. All the talk amongst the kids at school seems to be minecraft related etc and from asking around the parents most kids have something. He has a tablet but only uses it to watch Netflix or Disney stuff etc. There will be rules though - not at all during the week and only on the weekends for a set number of hours.

I let DD play on my Switch when she turned 6. I pick the games carefully for content and difficulty. She is neurotypical and not good at video games.

Thanks all, very helpful. You have all confirmed that I should trust my gut. Will feel more confident holding off for as long as possible!

DDs are 9 and 7. DH has a PS4 and every so often we will get them playing one of the free games you can download but honestly they are completely rubbish at them and it always ends in tears.

DD1 plays Roblox on her kindle fire. But screen time has always made her grumpy and we have to limit it otherwise it is horrendous living with her.

We got our an old wii when he was 5 because they had one at his after school club and he was struggling to join in. He only had mariocart and wii fit on it though so didn’t play for hours.

I've never limited my DS (also with ASD) on screens. We first got a console when he was about 8 but apart from the first few months he never really used it (DD did instead). He is now 15 and uses his PC for a lot of hours each day (when not at school or with friends) but he rarely plays games thankfully (he does lots of programming and researching his special interests). Gaming tends to be addictive so I'd hold off at your DS's age. When you do decide to go for it I'd definitely advise a PC over a console as it has so many more uses and he can still game on it.

My DS was 5.
I think its the norm. It certainly is where I am anyway.
They all play together online after school. It's quite handy for winter and was an absolute God send during lockdown.

Don’t do it!!!!!

Or do it but leave it as late as possible ie teens.

DS used to love reading, love board games, love lego/crafts, love hanging out. Now all he thinks and talks about is gaming and even though we have strict time limits, the time when he’s not gaming is just waiting to game and talking about gaming. He no longer enjoys reading or lego and has zero interest in talking about anything that’s not gaming. He reminds me of a drug addict. I suspect one day in future psychologists will prove its deeply harmful for children’s brains.

If I could go back in time I would never have got it.

We got a Switch as a joint present when our youngest were 3 and 5 (with their elder primary aged sibling). They're not really that bothered by it and it's normally me playing it that actually triggers them to remember it's there despite the fact that it sits next to the tele.

We've got Mario Kart, Mario Party and Harry Potter Lego amongst some others.

We've never limited screen time etc. though and find that ours are the least interested in TV of our friends' kids; they were probably overexposed when they were younger so now don't care!

How old is your DS?

"We've never limited screen time etc. though and find that ours are the least interested in TV of our friends' kids; they were probably overexposed when they were younger so now don't care!"

I think it's just down to luck and the personality of the child(ren). If I allowed my DS unlimited screen time he would do nothing else. I think some people (children included) have more addictive personalities than others.

Ds2 had x box from an early age because ds1 is older. Don't sweat it. My 2 are still rounded, friends, study hard, play sports, out with friends, play tonnes of x box. never had a problem with it.

What's an early age? 5?

Glad your DC don't have a problem with it. I'm worried that mine might.

My 10 yr old DS's are ND.. they got switch lites at 8 but are not allowed to game on line.. they use their gaming as a safe place and to regulate but they do struggle to separate the real world and the gaming world as their gaming world is very real to them. They have also lost interest in other activities. I am careful what they play as well... absolutely no fortnite for example. They just wouldn't cope with it and I saw how their NT friends behavior changed when they played it.

Mine got an xbox x last year at 6 and 3 respectively. They play with it primarily before school/preschool but happily leave it to head off. They'd much rather do something with me such as jigsaws, play, craft than game. The now 7 year old does activities mon to thurs evenings and plays sport at the weekend. The now 4 year does two activities mid week and 2 at the weekend. That helps as well plus we mostly play with them. For example dh and ds have played multiple 2 player games and dc2 and I are working on a single player puzzle game together.

Not sure I would have agreed if either were showing signs of addiction to devices/TV though.

Dc1 is currently being assessed but he's very rule oriented so accepts limits on his screen time very easily.

We have a switch and DD is 5, we play games together on the big screen as a family. Mario party is like a board game with lots of little mini games to win, it's a fun family night in, she doesn't get much time on it alone as a hand held but she understands and has learnt that boundary, it's no issue, and family game nights are loads of fun

Same. We've always had game consoles in the house and it's never really been an issue.