School lunch concern

[Picklebob123]

Son holds teachers hands and stays with them all lunch. Would you say this is a concern as he is not socialising?

Depends how old he is. 4? 14?

I work in a primary school and would be concerned if the was an everyday occurrence. How old is your son?

How has the teacher got time for this? It doesn't make any sense.

Or 42. Maybe he is the assistant head.

We need more details, how old is he and how do you know about this. If your child has told you you need to take it with a pinch of salt. If it has been raised by the school then you should’ve asked them what they planned to do about it.

Hes just turned 6. Why take it as a pinch of salt? He talks to adults better than kids and hugs all the lunch assistants in the playground as most are the parents.

Had another issue arise first so I bought this upto the teachers and I'm getting little communication, said they've put a plan in place for lunchtime club but he's told me he's not been going as not been told to. Not once have they actually watched him at lunch and confirmed this is true.

What has his teacher said when you've discussed it with them? I can't imagine a teacher would choose to do this unless it was absolutely necessary (and I even find that hard to believe as when would the teacher have their lunch?)

I would definitely say that was a concern and I’d be very, very grateful to that teacher.

Not once have they actually watched him at lunch and confirmed this is true.

If he spends lunchtime holding someone's hand (surely a mid day supervisor and not a teacher) then they do know what he is doing.

Yes sorry, the lunchtime assistants hand. Just feels like the lunch assistants don't talk to the main teachers.

I would definitely be concerned about this, and would hope that teacher’s would encourage him to mix with other children. Has your DS ever played with children his age OP?

I'm a lunchtime assistant and often feel brushed off by teachers when raising concerns. I think yes it's a concern if it's happening a lot.

Not ideal but the hand over can be quite rushed with umpteen playground incidents to tell the teacher about. The lunch time supervisors have finished their hours and are keen to leave and the teacher is under pressure to settle the children and get on with the afternoon's work.

I think there are always one or two children who prefer to walk round with the staff because they are shy or nervous. I was one myself and I turned into ... a teacher.

I think he gets on fine in class even though he doesn't like going to school.

I'm just finding the lack of communication difficult. The whole of last week he seemed off so I asked his teacher and she said he had an emotional week yet no one thought to tell me.

As a teacher that isn't the sort of thing I'd have time to raise with a parent unless their behaviour/demeanour was significantly different to their usual self.

I'm not sure that I've even spoken to the midday supervisors so far this school year. Our paths don't cross!

Does he talk about any friends? Does he see anyone from school out of school? Does he do any activities where you can see how he interacts with other children?

Has your DC told you why he's doing this? What are his reasons? Does he not like the games played? Does he not like the other children? Is it too noisy/boisterous etc?

He finds lunch noisy, he dosnt like other kids games and he says he just wants to be alone.

On one hand he's bright, energetic, confident with adults, so helpful yet he is really anxious kid, nervous on playground equipment/soft play, fussyish eater.

Then yes, I would be concerned he's not socialising & not attempting to interact with the other children.

But if he's not unhappy and likes to walk round with the adults is it a problem? There are loads of children who do this at playtime as well as dinner time and they grow out of it. It's better than hating break times altogether which some others do and is much more of a problem.