To go cold turkey on night feeds

[Exworrier]

So first of all apologies for posting again, I am having a rough time with DS2 (age 12m) and frantically trying to solve our issues.

He has always fed to sleep or fed til drowsy including night wakings and now this is a huge issue for us. He goes to bed at 6.30/7 with a 7oz bottle. Wakes 10.30pm for 5oz, wakes 2.30pm for 5oz and then is up at 6.30am. This is 17oz alone overnight and he has a further 15oz milk during the day. He does eat well but not as much as he should for a 98th centile baby.

Now feeding to sleep has stopped working, you can feed him, put him down and he will seem sleepy and then 10mins later he is standing up or crying and this will go on and on until you feed him again. We’ve tried checking in every 5 mins, we’ve tried comforters, music and cuddles, patting, shushing etc. Nothing will get him to sleep until he gets more milk, we’ve tried water and it doesn’t work! You end up giving him ridiculous amounts of milk just to get him to sleep.

Me and DH are on our knees through lack of sleep, I’ve got bacterial tonsillitis and I was up for 4h last night 🙃we are thinking about just saying no more milk, no more bottles anywhere near his bedroom. He can have cups of milk with his food and snacks but no more milk to sleep. We’ve ordered an expensive baby sleep lamp and a new comforter with a dummy attached for him (he’s never taken a dummy before) because at this point we want to arm ourselves with everything we can.

has anyone done cold turkey, did it work? Any other suggestions very welcome.

Have you added in a couple of snacks a day and supper yet?

@upfucked Yes he has breakfast at 7.30/8, then bottle with nap, then a snack after his morning nap, then lunch, then bottle with afternoon nap, then a snack on the school run and then he has a big dinner followed by bottle and bed.

Yes we did cold turkey, takes a couple of nights of pain and then DS slept through. The key is to stick with it - do not give in!! If you do give up and give milk during the night it will make trying to break the habit 10x harder. He doesn’t need the milk - it’s a habit he has got use to. Make a decision today, zero milk during the night. Short term pain, for long term gain.

@AnnoyedHumph Thank you. What did you do when baby was screaming crying?

DS is weird in that if we go in and do anything other than feed him it makes him 10x more cross with us and he turns the screaming up a notch.

I would drop the day time bottles and offer bigger portions of food. What are his snacks? Are they high fat or just toddler crisps?

We did cold turkey with controlled crying.

You have to be consistent and expect protest on the first night.

He doesn't need that milk at this age so he will be ok if you deny it

@upfucked Well he is CMPA so fats are tricky but he will eat avocado, dairy free yoghurt, dairy free butter on things etc. usually snacks are crisps, biscuits, peanut butter on toast.

A bottle? Try a cup.

My son is CMPA and needed to put on weight when early weaning.

We used coconut yoghurt with fruit purée, avocado, peanut butter and lots and lots of dairy free butter on his food.

Thank you, this pretty much what we offer! He is hit or miss with eating. I do believe it’s a bit of a vicious cycle that the night feeds are filling him up too much to eat properly, but he isn’t eating enough to feel too full for night feeds 🥹

Hi everyone, altho we haven't gone cold turkey yet (waiting until the weekend) we did have a small breakthrough last night. It was 3am, baby just got fed at 2am but started crying and moaning loudly. Usually when he does this I give in and feed him more milk, this time I said to myself - he is warm, he is fed, he is safe and has everything he needs - and I just left him. He cried loud for about 15 minutes, then quietly for 5 mins, then he went to sleep and slept until 8am. I actually got a good sleep. I think it shows that he can do it if left to!