My baby doesn’t like cuddles

[KatyJayne18]

My baby boy is 6 weeks old today and I have noticed over the last 2 weeks, he just cries his eyes out when I pick him up. He will happily play, coo and smile in his moses basket when he wakes up, on his play mat and changing mat, but even when he gets irritated after so long of being down there, I pick him up and he just cries. I try to cuddle him, soothe him, rock him and cradle him but he seems to hate it and works himself up into a right frenzy!
The only time he lets me hold him is when he’s having a bottle or when he’s falling asleep. I expected him to be laying in my arms, smiling at me, looking at me and cooing to me by this age but he’s not.
I am really concerned that it’s something more. Has anyone else experienced this?

Interesting about the reflux posts, I did wonder if DD had it as she was a prolific puker. But it was covid and no one seemed to care as she was bf.

. I feel as though he should be looking up at me, happy and settled, but he just isn’t at all. He’s fine over my shoulder and a lot better when I stand up swaying him from side to side,

It doesn't sound like there's anything wrong with your baby at all but rather that you have a bit of a romanticised view of what having a tiny baby would be like. Babies are little people with their own set of preferences. He prefers being upright on your shoulder and being walked/swayed which is really, really common.
My ds wouldn't ever let me sing, sway, rock, cuddle him to sleep. He just likes to be put down and left to get on with it himself. It was a surprise and I learnt the hard way as, like you, I had a romanticised view of motherhood. I learnt very quickly though that if I followed his lead then having a tiny baby was much less stressful.

My dd was the same. Only wanted to be upright. Either over my shoulder or in the sling. She would like it if I was lounging on the sofa with my knees up and her back was against my legs, so at an angle but still upright. That way she could see me, which she did appreciate in small doses. It never occurred to me that this was odd and that I should be cradling her.

My DS was like that, just didn't want/need cuddles ... fiercely independent and a great sleeper (self settled from day one) always happy and smiley. Maybe he takes after me ... I am absolutely not a touchy feely type person.
He's a 21 year old student now and happily gives me a cuddle when we meet up!

My DS2 didn’t like being cradled but loved being carried around on my shoulder. it’s just their personality. Nody little gits

@Orangesatsuma physio is for talipes of both feet. Yes we had a traumatic birth…forceps. However the physio therapist has checked him over properly today and she has no concerns regarding anything as his feet have corrected themselves

@Ragwort yes my little one is exactly like that! He has self settled from day one, doesn’t cry at night time when he wakes for a feed and just shouts. He is happy to play in his play gym and smiles away at us when doing this. Just physically doesn’t like to be held in the cradle position at all

Neither of my babies were interested in just being held and looking up at me, and frankly I don't blame them - how boring!

With DD1 I had to be moving constantly whatever the position. DD2 is somewhat more laidback and will just sit but only if facing outward on my lap so she can see the room.

And both find/found the cradle hold just uncomfortable. When carrying them about I do it upright against my chest.

@CoalCraft its the screaming part that bothers me. When I cradle him to feed, he will feed fine but as soon as the bottles out his mouth and he’s clearly finished feeding, he screams, arches his back and stiffens his legs

Another one with a nosy parker. Just liked to be looking around getting the best view and staring up at my triple chins and nose hair in a cradle was just not what he enjoyed.

My DM always told me I hated cuddles as a baby/child. I didn't like being constrained and liked to be left alone 😆

I still don't as an adult really! I like my own space.

Reflux?

My son hated the cradle position. He had silent reflux. I cuddled him upright against my chest.