Just short of a 4 year age gap, will they play together?

[doingitalllagain]

My son will be 3 years and 7 months when my baby is born in a couple of months. We lost a baby at 18 weeks pregnant in between leading to the bigger gap.

I think I still picture what it would of been with the smaller gap, and I'm wondering whether in reality it'll be a bit different. Will they ever really play together? Will they feel like close siblings? Will they ever want to do similar things? I am a little bit sad at how it's all worked out, obviously, but happy this baby is healthy and arriving soon.

Has anyone got this age gap? What's it like?

Every child is different, you can't predict how it turns out - which I'm sure you know. Kids with a one year age gap can be really close, or fight like cats and dogs, or be indifferent to each other, because they're all individuals. The same applies for two years, four years, eight years, you name it!

For what it's worth my friends have kids with a 3.5 year age gap, currently six and a half and an almost three year old, both boys. They've played together since the little one was old enough to sit up and do things, and still do. There are periods where the toddler just tended to break whatever the older one was playing with, and he didn't understand the rules of games, but even then his brother would be keen to play with him as he's a ready-made available playmate and otherwise it was just an inept or busy adult in the house!

I have a 4 Yr age gap - they play together all the time. DD doted on her little brother and as they grew they have a great bond. He really looks up to her and yes they bicker but 99% of the time they are fine. They are 5&9 now and most evenings you can find them together playing. It's lovely!

It has something to recommend it tbh. We have a 5yo and 1yo twins. Older DD and baby DD get on particularly well but tbh they all generally play well together, DD will read to the babies etc. And they love her friends! I often find them toddling after the bigger kids in the park.

4 year gap between my two. They love love love each other to bits and play together all the time. There’s frustrations and arguments but they’re adorable together.

There is 3 years and 4 months between mine. I was very ill after my first so it took a while to be brave enough to try again.

They are currently 7 (boy) and 4 (girl). They play together really well a lot of the time.

Mine have a 4 year gap and they played together loads. They're still really close now they're in their teens.

I have a 4 year age gap between mine ( nearly 12 and 16)

at first it was great. I didn't have 2 in nappies. The 4 year old was reasonably well behaved and able to do things like pass a nappy or be trusted ti hold the buggy and not my hand to cross the road. Could also pour own cereal/butter toast etc so as not to need me to do absolutely everything while holding a baby. They got on pretty well and played together up until the oldest started high school.

Now, they have nothing in common. Different bed times , finding activities that both can access/be interested in is nigh on impossible.

I now wish id had them closer together tbh

It depends on the personalities. 4 years is my smallest age gap. 3.5 years like you will have would have been too close, for me, because it’s before school age. I also have a six year age gap. They have always played together, they are super close and choose to hang out together.

Unlike a pp, even though my oldest is at college now and youngest in primary, we have no problem finding things to do they all like. They often go for days out or around town together without us parents, by choice. They don’t fight and rarely have, and are genuinely physically affectionate with each other, often sitting on each other’s laps, sneaking into each other’s bedrooms in the night for a cuddle if one is scared, helping each other out with homework’s etc. They can remember the days their siblings were born (except the youngest obv) and life before. I joke they are a bit weird as siblings are supposed to hate each other (I certainly don’t like mine).

I have that age Gap and we used to joke that DD was a much stricter parent than me and DH ever were! DD used to give DS bollockings that he took far more seriously than when we did it, including marching him into Beavers and making him apologise to The Leaders for his behaviour!
Once DS hit 8 or 9 and wasn’t in awe of DD so much they seemed to grow apart a bit and they complain about eachother and don’t have a lot in common.
However, they are 17 and 13 now and they rub along ok, he is twice her size and quite protective - he isn’t happy if her boyfriend upsets her and was unhappy when the BF started staying over in her room (stayed in the spare room at first)
The age gap worked ok for us, I couldn’t have coped with a smaller one bit I think it would work better if they were the same sex