Feel bad. Just yelled at my DS.

[viggoswife]

My DS came home from school this afternoon, turned his nose up at the Bob the Builder comic I bought him and said he wished I had bought him a toy instead. He then asked for coke, I said no not till dinner whereupon he seized the bottle and threw it across the room. The lid burst off and coke went everywhere. I shouted at him - not alot but still and then put him to bed. He is up now but I feel like cr*p. Is there anyone out there who would not have yelled at this and if so what is your secret?

why the hell would you feel crap about reacting to your child being a brat?

he deserved it

How old is he?

(did you notice how I failed to do the mumsnet reaction to coke? did you? did you? )

I would stop giving him coke. And don't buy him treats as a matter of course, if you want him to appreciate it.

Never fear Twiggg, Greeny's here

nope. would have have started shouting WAY before you.

Oh Lordy, thank God Twiglett put that, because I know there are people on Mumsnet who think that raising your voice to your child is forever damaging to the child, to yourself and a dreadful heinous crime in general.. but Viggo, your child was being obnoxious, as children can be, and being a human being (as most if not all of us are) then you can be forgiven for shouting at him..

I doubt you screamed a long and sweary torrent of vile abuse into his face did you? Well stop worrying then!

And I hope you didn't let him have the coke even at dinner after treating you like that! (In fact, you're best off leaving the coke out entirely.. I am NOT one of the MN Food Police (lol at the thought) but it does vile things to their teeth and makes a good few of them hyperactive).

I would have shouted too. My tolerance levels seem very low with my two atm, but think my period isn't helping there!

Diet Coke only very occasionally with meals. Not an everyday thing I can assure you. He is nearly 5.

I don t feel bad about reacting to him being a brat but I worry when I feel angry enough to shout like that. The shout just burst out of me before I could stop it and I steered him swiftly up the stairs and into bed. I am not really a shouter but sometimes I just get so stressed out. I just remember being so scared of my Mum when she used to shout and scream at me. I dont want to be like that.

Sorry Twig. I've let you down I'll have to go and jon the Food Police and Semi-Perfect Mummy Brigade now won't I..

(and now I'm avoiding the mumsnet reaction to diet carbonated drinks with caffeine .. see how good I am? do you? )

Lol. I PROMISE that carbonated beverages of any kind are rare. I suppose that is why I am upset because I was trying to give him a treat today.

what did he do to deserve a 'treat' then?

Well I would have sounded like a fish wife if it was one of my brats dc.

Fell over and hurt his eye at school.

and did he deal with it particularly well so you felt he deserved a treat

or was the fact that he hurt himself enough

personally I think the former is a good reason but not the latter

he does sound like he's been rather brattish tonight ... are you still beating yourself up, or do you feel better?

I do feel better actually. Rather wish I had substituted "apple juice" for "coke" in my original post though .

He was really smiley when I picked him up from school even though he had a bruise under his eye and he has only been at school for 3 weeks and doing really well and I just wanted him to have a happy evening with some nice things happening.

I think I overeact with feeling guilty after I shout because my main memories as a child are of being shouted at and I know that some good things happened too but I think the bad stand out more. I am worried that DS will only remember the shouting. I do think he was particularly obnoxious this evening though.

unfortunatly we are not all self pro claimed super mums and we do these things.
doesnt mean anything except we are human and sometimes we react like this.
so don't beat yourself up too much.
the occassional shout does'nt cause bad memories for child, especialy when most the time they are surrounded with love and praise.
I am one of 7 myself and we knew the minute our Mum shouted at us we had pushed her to her limit and it gave us a short sharp shock to think of our behavior.
but always afterwoods when she had taken a breather she made sure she gave us a cuddle and exsplained why she shouted at us and she was sorry but we should'nt have behaved the way we did.

unfortunatly we are not all self pro claimed super mums and we do these things.
doesnt mean anything except we are human and sometimes we react like this.
so don't beat yourself up too much.
the occassional shout does'nt cause bad memories for child, especialy when most the time they are surrounded with love and praise.
I am one of 7 myself and we knew the minute our Mum shouted at us we had pushed her to her limit and it gave us a short sharp shock to think of our behavior.
but always afterwoods when she had taken a breather she made sure she gave us a cuddle and exsplained why she shouted at us and she was sorry but we should'nt have behaved the way we did.