I have a 9 month old baby and pregnant again

[Mummaforlife26]

Please no judgement, I have a 9 month old baby and just found out I'm expecting again (not planned but am with partner) he's over the moon, haven't told anyone as I don't know how far gone I am but I feel sad, like I'm happy but sad, I loved that I have my little prince after trying for so long and our bond is amazing and so so close, proper mummy's boy and I'm so worried he will feel different around and with me and I feel so sad and I think of it, to the point I get really emotional, I don't feel as excited at the moment like I should and I feel awful about it. Will my baby boy feel different with and around me during my pregnancy and after 2nd baby is born? At the moment it's only me then can settle him, feed his bottles (he won't take off anyone) and he was breastfed for first 6 almost 7 months. He really is my everything and I'm scared I won't start to feel the same way with my second which I hate thinking like this as I know when I was trying so hard for years to get pregnant the first time I'd get so angry with women who felt like this. Please don't judge me, I'm judging myself so hard already

Closest gap here is 13 months. No regrets.. Plenty of positives ime!
Congratulations op!

My eldest two DCs were born 20 months apart, so only a slightly larger gap. 3 years on they are BEST FRIENDS. I think there is much to enjoy about small gaps (exhausting though they are)

This happened to a colleague of mine years ago: She felt sad, and guilty about her first baby not getting the 1-1 first DCs usually get ... years later, she said it was the best thing that could possibly have happened. Her two girls are so close, they have grown up together and share everything. I think so long as you include your son in whatever you are doing with the new baby, I think you'll be fine. The good thing is that he is so young he won't really know any different. Congratulations!

Having a second is a mental head fuck. I remember when dc2 was a couple days old googling if I could put him up for adoption but still keep dc1 without social services being involved 😅 I remember all the fear and worry in pregnancy that I had made a mistake and the little harmony we had would be turned on its head. And routine and general family life was turned on its head for a few days, then we adapted, changed and found a new family routine and harmony. Which in its own changes daily, weekly, monthly anyway, depending on the children and their ages.

The great thing about a small age gap? The older child will never remember life without their sibling. I'm so glad we had our DC close together - 18 months age difference. As far as they can remember it's always been two of them and they are best friends, worst enemies, safe spaces and equals in the family.

Some days I love to just hang slightly outside of sight so I can hear them in their play. I adore how they speak to eachother, imagine together and just laugh together.

There's 12 months between mine. It's been absolutely brilliant. Intense but brilliant.

I have 18 months between my two boys and it's the best thing I've ever done. They are best friends even though they fight like cat and dog.

I remember being worried when I was pregnant with DS2 that I wouldn't be able to love him as much as I loved my first. It's nonsense, I now have 4 and I love them all equally.

Congratulations OP

I've got two close friends, both with 2 DC. One has a 12 month gap and one has a 4 year gap. Both have said that they envy the other one and in the end decided that there are plus points and negatives to whatever age gap you have

At least this way you'll get the sleepless nights and nappy days over more quickly instead of spreading it out over years.

Thank you so much everyone, reading these has made me feel better about the situation, starting to come to terms with it now 😊

I felt the same when I found out I was expecting my second when my dd was only a few months old. 12 months gap between my girls who are now 7 and 8 and wouldn't change it for the world.