Making new friends

[Emmamc93]

I have a new baby he’s 5 months old and just two months before I got pregnant with him I had a miscarriage at 3 months so it feels like I’ve been pregnant and in the new baby phase for a life time now

since I stopped drinking with my friends I seem to have lost them all and have no one really to talk to apart from partner and it’s starting to get me down. Id love to be able to go for coffees / walks with someone during the day.

my question is really did anyone else struggle to make new friends after having a baby, I’ve tried baby classes and just can’t seem to be able to make any friends. How did everyone else go about getting new mum friends

I have no advice because I have found myself in a similar situation, seemed to have drifted from all of my friends - none of whom have children when I had my first during Covid. I tried baby classes too but didnt make any friends, struck up the odd bit of conversation with people but nothing that lasted and a lot of women seemed to be attending with friends which made it harder.

I've just had my second and we are living in a new area so I'm hoping to try again with baby classes when I am feeling up to going to them but I'm not overly hopeful. I dont know where else to turn to for mum friends. It's so hard making friends as an adult. I'm sending you lots of empathy and please know, you are not the only one in this boat. The isolation makes mothering even harder.

Sending you support, you are definitely not alone. if you are happy to share a rough location maybe others can recommend places or groups?

We relocated when DS was 1 and I made an informal target to talk to two people a day outside of our household. Not necessarily prolonged chats, sometimes just interacting and over time found it easier to talk to new people.

babies are a great conversation starter, so use your son here. And congratulations!

Ive found this also and would love some mum friends

I have friends but I feel sort of like we are on different paths now. Like they even have kids but as they are older I think people forget how hard it is when you have a new born

I've just downloaded peanut it's like tinder for mums ! Where you can meet up and make friends etc so I would recommend that x

I know it’s tough (I’m a very socially awkward person) but I think you need to just keep trying the baby groups. In my experience the stay and play type groups are much better than classes due making friends. Are there any groups in your area specifically for under 1s? They will have more of a turnover if people so if you go and don’t meet anyone there will be new people there soon. Just really force yourself into conversations, it sounds cringy, but at the end of the day everyone else is there to make friends too!

*for not due

Ladies I just started up a thread about meeting new people! I am always up for a chinwag!

I had my baby abroad and then moved back when he was 6 months so missed out on all the ante natal classes where people seem to meet each other! I've found the peanut app quite good (I've met a few mums and now have a couple of really good friends through that). I also signed up to a weaning course locally and also met a mum in the library, got talking and then asked if she'd like to meet one day & got her number. I've deliberately tried to go out of my comfort zone and be active in asking people to meet up regularly just for a coffee etc which seems to work. It's hard work though but I found a similar tactic worked when making friends abroad. I haven't met other mums at baby groups, I think there is too much going on and everyone seems to leave so quickly!

The church playgroup type activities are good for making new friends. I made zero friends at baby classes as people either went with others they knew, or didn't really want to chat (completely fine).
Maybe also look for a mum and baby walking group? Or the app peanut?