Does your toddler say please and thanks?

[1jan2020]

What age should you ideally start teaching this and what age did your child actually start saying it without being prompted?

Mine were taught to say it before they started talking and would say it automatically until they started school. Now at primary school age they need constant reminding and it seems that all their friends are like that too from the playdates I have hosted. I would say maybe only 1 or 2 out of 10 would say it without prompting from a parent.

He’s 2 next week and always has really. We signed it from a few months in, he learnt the signs and used those before he could speak. We model and say it when he should and will say ‘what do you say’ and he says please (and usually signs it at the same time)

Yes, right from the beginning. She'll say it 9/10 I'd say.

As soon as they could pass me a toy (or anything) I’d thank them. Now all have said it automatically from 18 months. Rarely do they not say thank you and are rarely prompted. It’s modelling it from early on.

With all of my kids I started early, from when they started babbling and trying to talk. Teaching them how and when to say please and thank you and teaching the sign language too.
And as they got older I made sure they stuck to it.
It was something that I was a real stickler for.

With my 2 year old, it's sporadic. sometimes he does, sometimes he doesn't. If he says "biscuit mummy", I just repeat "can I have a biscuit please, mummy" while giving it to him. I don't withhold stuff or make him say it. He will usually repeat whatever I say anyway. Other times he will say please and thank you without prompting but not too often!

I agree with modelling it and, later on, gentle reminders, but don't make a big thing of it. It's really not something to get into a standoff with a toddler about - they'll gradually pick it up if they hear you being polite.

My child has done since 2 also.
Says without prompting now.

I would say it to him, did since he was little, then once he got his speech I would remind him and then it stuck.

One of DDs very first words was "shankoooo"! She's nearly 3 now and says thank you pretty much every time, needs prompting on please now and then.

Yes, my 2 year old does. And also says 'You're welcome' when I say thank you to him which is very cute!

Thank you for this post. DGS is two and a half. He does not say please or thank you, but he hasn't had it modelled to him by his DPs.

My three year old says please and thank you consistently now. He was speech delayed though and didn't speak until 2.5 so I didn't push 'unnecessary' words at first. He just naturally started adding them in himself when he got close to three.

My 2 yo is reasonable (but not amazing by MN standards ). We give big praise when she remembers but don't prompt when she forgets - it's not like it's genuine at this age and they're learning so much it's not a huge priority for me. Did the same with her 4 yo sister who is pretty good (and does get prompted if she forgetse) so don't see a need to change it.

Elder DD couldn't- but had (has!) Speech delay and selective mutism. Fortunately most people picked up on the inability to talk not lack of manners. She is finally able to talk to strangers now at 10yo.

Younger DD has talked for her sister since she was a toddler, including please and thank you.(year and half younger)

My 2.5 year old does. Been doing it since around 20 months - she couldn’t talk then but I taught her the signs and she’d do them all the time in context.