What happens if you don't sleep train?

[Bringmethesleep]

Just that really...I'd love to hear some first hand experiences of what happens if you DON'T sleep train your little one? Do they get there in their own time? Or will the misery just continue forever? Hit me with your experiences...

?? We sleep trained and have a 3yr old who sleeps through the night in her big bed...

My 3 children are 2, 9 and 11. All 3 sleep in their own beds and sleep all night. The older 2 put them selves to bed. I've never sleep trained. They all slept in my bed when they wanted to. I rocked them, cuddled them, picked them up when they cried and breastfed them all to sleep until toodlerhood. Basically I did all the things you're 'not supposed to'. They were all terrible sleepers, the third waking up 15+ times a night, but all eventually started sleeping through the night. I now have an 8 month old who I'm doing the same with. I know he will eventually sleep through the night too. So basically, if you don't sleep Train, your kids will eventually sleep through the night.

This is so interesting to read...thank you all!

With DD1 we coslept till DD2 was nearly here and then she said she wanted to sleep in her own bed. Now at 3.5 she goes to bed in her own bed about half 7/8 but appears (silently!) to get in with one of us in the night and then sleeps through to 7/8am. At bedtime of us reads to her and then cuddles her till she falls asleep, which doesn't take long.

Hoping to do same with DD2 who I am now cosleeping with.

We've never really been sleep deprived with either DD, either DH or me, so it's definitely worked well for us to just go with the flow.

We haven't sleep trained our baby. Couldn't bear to leave him to cry so he's been responded to every-time he asked for us. Slept through on and off from 7 months just occasionally disrupted by teeth and starting nursery but always reverts back to sleeping through.

I think a lot is just down to temperament

We didn’t sleep train, I can’t listen to my children crying and me withholding comfort.

Co-slept for the first 7 months, then moved to own room with floor bed - I’d usually stay and co-sleep in the night. Breastfeeding to sleep, it’s the fastest way for me.

When DS1 was walking and baby gate was off (around 2yo) he was waking once in the night and just walked to our bed.

At 2.5yo we had to wean him off and keep him in his bed because I was heavily pregnant - it happened easily and fuss-free, and he started sleeping full nights then.

Baby sleep is a rollercoaster - any cold, teething, developmental changes can affect sleep negatively. Roll with the punches, most of them sleep well enough by 2-3yo.

DD always slept in her own cot but till she was about 2 we had to walk her to sleep ie carry her while walking up and down and singing songs. Then she eventually started falling asleep on her own in her cot but we still had to stay in the room and sometimes pat her till she was asleep. Now at 6 she still won't fall asleep on her own and dh sleeps most nights in her room on the floor....

Ds is just 15 months but has gone from worse to worse. He used to sleep quite happily in his cot and only woke up once a night to feed, which I was quite happy with. Since I've stopped breastfeeding everything has gone down the drain. Most nights I need to walk with him till he sleeps and can only put him in the cot when he is fast asleep. Usually at some point in the night I put him in my bed but now he won't sleep there either and I again need to walk with him till he's fast asleep.

We obviously have somehow completely failed to get our kids to sleep in a sensible way.

Am planning to contact some sort of baby sleep expert but I suspect they will suggest some form of crying it out.

I had a routine from the first day. Bath, story, feed, bed. I had the evening with my husband. Second one didn't go down so easily but by three months she went down well too. In early months sleepy feed at 11pm then again if baby woke up, then around 6 up for the day.
So, I had adult time with my husband, rested kids. In contrast I had a friend who let her kid go to bed anytime from 9 to 12, and had to stay with her till she fell asleep, and mornings were equally unscheduled and ad hoc. It didn't change until the child started school.

DD is 2 now. We moved her to her own room at 6 months and I'd rock/feed to sleep. Night weaned at 14 months and wake ups reduced to 1-2, DH would go settle her. Now at 2 yrs she she mostly sleeps through 7.30-6.30 and is either rocked or patted to sleep. I'm glad I didn't put her through sleep training, she got there in her own time :)

It’s 2:30 and I’m currently nursing my 23 month old back to sleep . That’s what happens when you don’t sleep train haha 😆

My firstborn was great though and by 10 months old was sleeping through the night and has been ever since ( he’s nearly 4). My second born is a different story. We ended up co sleeping a lot over the past two tears, otherwise I wouldn’t had survived . He does sleep though but it’s not consistent.

First DD was a horrendous sleeper. We had a couple of attempts at sleep training but they did not go well (she is the world’s most stubborn child). I caved in to co-sleeping although I really hadn’t wanted to, and found we all got much more sleep. Gradually between about 18 months and 2 her sleep improved and she transitioned to her own bed. At 5 she goes down no problem - likes us to sit with her until she’s asleep but that doesn’t take long, and she’s accepting if we can’t. She occasionally wakes with a nightmare and one of us will spend a few minutes resettling her, and she does occasionally sneak in to the bottom of our bed in the early hours but it doesn’t wake us. Generally sleeps 8/8:30-6:30-7. She’s never really needed massive amounts of sleep - could have a very late night and still get up at her usual time and be full of beans, and as a baby never seemed affected by her shit sleeping.

DD2 (9 months) is a totally different ball game. Loves her sleep, naps no problem. I’ve co-slept from night 2 when she wouldn’t be put down in her Moses basket, and she pretty much sleeps through, occasionally stirring for a quick feed but I barely wake. She’s a much more easy going baby and would probably respond to sleep training, but I’m not planning on bothering. Will just go with the flow.

My DN was sleep trained and while she did start sleeping through for a bit she now at 9 likes to be in her DM’s bed as often as she can.

Both my DC are flat out at the minute. I’m wide awake resorting to MN as I can’t sleep… I was sleep trained.

That’s quite a long way of saying it’s not a problem not to sleep train. If it works for you you may or may not get more sleep in the short term. In the long run I’m sure it’ll make no difference. I work with sleep disorders and I’ve yet to see a referral for an adult who can’t link their sleep cycles and needs to be rocked to sleep every few hours because they were never taught to self settle.