Hyperemesis gravidarum second baby

[RedRobyn2021]

I suffered with HG for the first 25 weeks of my pregnancy. I never intended to ever have a baby again.

However my DD is basically the best thing that has ever happened to me, I love her deeply and desperately want a second child. She is only 20 months at the moment, but wanted to hear from other HG mums how long they left the gap before they felt strong enough to go through it all again?

Any words of wisdom?

I intended the gap to be around 3/4 years. It actually ended up being 6 years due to losses in between and whilst not what we planned, with the HG it was actually a good gap. My eldest was pretty self sufficient and could understand why I was ill and not able to do things with her. I think it would be very, very hard with a toddler.

I didn't suffer HG so I hope you don't mind me commenting but I did have horrendous "morning sickness" with my fear of being sick, I swore I would never have a 2nd. That on top of a hard labour and EMCS and complicated recovery, DD was going to be an only child.

Now she is 2y3mo I am pregnant 10 weeks with our 2nd, I just focused on the end goal and pictured them playing together, christmases, family holidays... all the joy. It also helped to think of her having someone one day who will be in the same boat as her when my partner and I pass (depressing I know! but it made me realise how important it was to me for her to have a sibling)

I'm 10 weeks now and suffered debilitating nausea, not physically sick so I don't think it's HG but I'm on meds, haven't left the house, have to have people come in and help with my daughter because if I move too much I retch and gag. It's so nasty and it's been a hard time BUT... it's going fast, there are tablets to help. I am feeling low about the rest of my pregnancy granted, but every day that passes I am so glad it's one less day and one more day towards what I want.

I would say make sure you have a good support network, shut your eyes and jump in the deep end! Before you know it, you'll be so pregnant and it'll be a blur and you'll have 2 beautiful kids. That's what I'm telling myself everyday anyway! :D good luck OP.

I had HG but was 38 when i had my first so didnt have the luxury of waiting. I had my second within a year and a half. I cried when the preg test was positive even though i was trying. For some reason it wasnt as bad the second time around. I was mentally prepared for it, took medication right from the start, knew what foods i could have / have not. Got help to support with my first baby as i knew i would be unable to care for her on my own etc.
It was tough and a real act of love but the best thing i ever did. I wanted three originally but there was no way i could go through that a third time so stopped at two.
Key thing is to prepare for as much as you can and get help !! Good luck. its really awful.

I had HG with my second. Spent weeks and weeks in hospital with picc lines and all sorts, genuinely thought I’d die.

3 years later I had DS3 and I didn’t vomit a single time! I’m also pregnant again with DC4 and only been sick a handful of times.

there is a genuine chance you won’t suffer so much again

There's a 4 year gap between mine for this reason. I needed that long to mentally gear up again even though I knew I really did want another child. I was geared up more for having hg and was able to request medication as soon as I got a positive test. It lasted longer and was pretty horrendous but I didn't have pgp or polyhydramnios this time which was significantly better than my first pregnancy. I think because I knew how much I loved my daughter and the joys of those first kicks I was able to get though the worst weeks when I just couldn't lift my head from the pillow.

I left 3.5 years because I hoped my DH would forget about having another. I couldn't bare it again by he made a good case. I couldn't have done it any earlier. My DD was 3.5 years old when I had HG again. We put her in full time nursery and my DH had to do all the childcare but because she was a bit older she understood. Second HG was worse. I was bedbound from 6-26 weeks. 6 different meds, hospitalised for fluids etc.

I did it three times, though the middle time I lost the baby at 12 weeks. Obviously the second and third time I knew what I was going into. It was easier and harder, second time. Easier because I could advocate for myself well, I knew to ask for ondansetron straight away because it's the only medication that works for me, I knew to buy loads of ice lollies and Coca Cola. Harder because I had a three year old to look after. And a husband that had a nervous breakdown. And such bad mental health that I had to be monitored by MIMMS.

Ultimately it was worth it, as my DD is absolutely brilliant.

I couldn't go a fourth round though, it would possibly kill me.

There is 3 and a quarter years between mine. Initially we were going to have less of a gap but delayed it for other reasons (finances, career, job security etc). So glad we did delay it as the impact of the HG second time round was obviously much more difficult to manage, it had a big effect on DD who was 2.5 at the time. I had HG for about the first 5 months of the pregnancy and was off work for over 3 months. We had some limited additional family support with childcare and we also managed to increase DD's nursery time so when I was off sick she was either at nursery or being cared for by a relative during the daytime Mon-Friday. I was bed bound for months so couldn't have cared for her. The impact on DH was very tough too because he had to bear the full load for the family for months. House became a shit tip, DD's behaviour was horrendous, he was very worn down by it all. Also there was almost no care for me this time from him other than in the evenings because he was at work/busy with DD the rest of the time. Whereas first time round he only worked PT so he was around a lot to help look after me but I was left to it most the time second time round which was also hard and lonely. I did get peer support from the Pregnancy Sickness Support charity this time though which saved my mental health, I didn't deteriorate mental health wise anywhere near as bad. Also I didn't lose weight second time as for some reason was able to often tolerate high calorie food in bursts late on an evening if I didn't moce and then went straight to bed and I got on helpful medication sooner from the GP too. I went on first line antiemetics as soon as I got my positive test basically, went straight to the GP who was very supportive and quick to update meds when I got more sick etc.

My eldest is now 4.5 and has absolutely no recollection of me having HG.

How did you find the GP was prescribing medication second time round?

I am with a different surgery now than I was with my first, a little village rather than a city, feeling anxious they will refuse

My HG was nowhere near as bad as the first time around with DC2 if that helps.

Basically the dream and what I hope for! Statistically unlikely though, so I guess I have to prepare.

I'm glad you haven't suffered with 3 & 4

How did you find the GP about prescribing the medication?

@WeightoftheWorld it's good to know your eldest doesn't remember now. God that sounds tough. I think my DP will struggle, we have a dog and two cats as well. Plus there's the house and general life admin.

Gives me hope, thank you

There is a 4 year gap between my sons . I was hospitalised several times with my first pregnancy but with my second I felt so well. There are no guarantees but if you can I would speak to your GP or nurse and explain that you are worried about it happening again and ask how they would be able to support you. I had injections to try and stop the sickness, which would work for a short time . I'm sure there must be other things that can be done now. I hope you get some answers to help put your mind at ease

I had awful HG with my first. Was in hospital on a drip. Thought I'd never be able to do it again. Second pregnancy was totally different. I threw up a few times, but the constant nausea wasn't there (and weirdly, the sickness was triggered by completely different things - first pregnancy it was any kind of movement, second it was things that smelt bad). My doctor gave me ondansetron as soon as I threw up in my second pregnancy, maybe it was the early intervention that helped?

If you take ondansetron then take a stool softener as well as it turns your bowels to cement!

I had HG for DC1 and was hospitalised several times due to weakness, etc. it was hell. DC2 came along 15 months later and apart from the initial nausea, I was fine for the rest of the pregnancy. I did get gestational diabetes for both so that was hell but we all lived to tell the tale. Sending lots of good vibes your way.

I found GPs much better about prescribing medication the second time round. No arguments, no “have you tried eating six small meals a day instead of three big ones?” level of uselessness. It felt like as soon as they read ‘hyperemesis’ in my notes they were fine.

My GP even gave me a prescription for cyclizine ahead of time to start taking as soon as the sickness started and see how that went. (Ondansetron seems harder to do that with but cyclizine at least held the worst of it at bay to start.)

I had hg the first time around, but not the second. I know it is more common to have it again, but just to give you hope that it's not automatic!

My subsequent pregnancies were nowhere near as bad as my first.

I had it to term with #1 and just about 16 weeks with #2. With #2 though I developed SPD so that was a shit-ton of fun too.

some of us are worse at being pregnant than others. 🤷‍♀️

I had bad HG in pregnancies 1 and 3 (hospitalised on a drip) but with 2 although i was still very sick I did not have HG. No idea why. 18m between 1 and 2, 7 years between 2 and 3