Am I being dramatic/ too much?

[xttcbabyno1x]

I'm 15 weeks pregnant at the moment and everything seems to be getting to me at the moment, other halves family are talking about booking a holiday in the UK when little one is only a month old and quite frankly I don't want to go, I only get 3 months maternity leave and I want to be at home and enjoy time with my newborn..

My other half doesn't understand my point of view at all, I just don't want to be in a holiday home with everyone wanting to grab the baby, maybe it's selfish but I want to enjoy time to bond with my baby!

It's my first so I don't know if it's normal to feel this way? Just makes me want to cry!

I wouldn’t fancy that either. Say no thank you.

Completely normal and I'd be the exact same as you. Stay in the comfort of your own home while you get into the swing of motherhood.

@pictish thank you! I'm glad it's just me, I've told him he can go if he would like but I don't want to!

Not just me **

@DubLynn thank you so much! It seems I'm going to need to just stand my ground on how I feel xx

I wouldn’t do that. You could go 2 weeks overdue and then have to travel with a 2 week old very recently postpartum. Nope. You could be establishing breastfeeding. You could have a CS and be uncomfy sitting for too long.

No I wouldn’t want this either. At the moment you have no idea how you and baby will be, no idea if you will go overdue or how the birth will go and how you will have healed.

@AnneLovesGilbert thank you so much for replying and making me not feel crazy!

I actually just want to get used to being a mum and would prefer to just wait until the baby is a year old before going away from home! I've said 2024 I will go, but not next year!

If my partner wants to go, he can xx

Try not to let the small things get on top of you. All you have to do is tell your partner that you are not going and the discussion is now closed. He is free to go if he wants to.

You're definitely not being dramatic, especially that you only can take 3 months off work, enjoy every second you can with your baby. There's always gonna be time for holiday.

@Aquamarine1029 thank you so much, I did say this but unfortunately he can't accept it and turns it into an argument, feels like I'm hitting my head against a brick wall sometimes rather than being supported in my decisions!

@Rakszasa thank you so much! This was my point, I just want to enjoy time at home with my baby! X

The same list of things applies to him going. DD was 5 days late, EMCS, we were in for a week after then my scar got infected. Mum lives nearby and would have helped if DH had had to be away but she got shingles and couldn’t come over for 10 days.

Its a family holiday not a once in a lifetime trip to the moon. He shouldn’t be planning to be away from so soon. And due dates are bs, about 10% of babies arrive when expected. It’s all up in the air till it’s not.

@AnneLovesGilbert I agree 100% I'm so concerned as to why he's being like this it's like if he doesn't get his own way throws a paddy at the moment...

He should be on my side not making me feel like we're against each other! Such a shame, but I will have to make sure I put my foot down! I'm not going to do something I'm not comfortable doing. We already had to have a discussion because his mum said she wanted to wait outside of the hospital when I was giving birth to support him and I told him that's not happening!

Is your partner not aware that things with pregnancy and birth don't really ever go to plan? You could be overdue, need to stay in hospital for longer than most, have issues with feeding, be struggling with post birth injuries or mental health, recovering from a c section, having issues with sleep etc etc etc??

With my first I was 2 weeks overdue and then had to stay in hospital for a week. So for your planned holiday I would have only been out of hospital for a week. No way could I have gone on holiday. I was all over the place.

I'm sorry he thinks it's something he should argue with you about. Why would he want to browbeat you into agreeing to something that isn't practical and that you don't want to do?

How ridiculous to suggest a holiday a month after your due date. As others have said, what if you go over or need a C section? Just no.

Also your DH needs to be looking after you at this stage and should also not go.

I do think saying you won’t go for a year isn’t much of a compromise though - you may feel up to it earlier than that. See how you get on but don’t feel pressured into doing anything you don’t want to.

@RoseslnTheHospital exactly, he seems to just think that we're going to be in and out of the hospital within a few hours! I'm not sure he seems to want everything his way at the moment which is a real shame

@Merryclaire exactly I don't understand why he's being this way

Yeah a year might be a little dramatic but I don't want to say to him yes I'll go in October and then I don't feel comfortable because I feel he'd hold me to it xx