Could my DD be dyslexic? Pic

[ThreeGoldBars]

I had parents evening yesterday regarding DD9- year 5. I have always kept in touch with the school to express my concerns about her reading/writing/time keeping etc. I brought it up again yesterday when the teacher said DD is very day-dreamy and tends to go off into her own world a lot. She’s also having 1 to 1 with reading as they can see she’s behind, and I asked if it could be possible she has dyslexia, her bio father (not in the picture) and a lot of members on his side of the family have it along with ADHD. I was immediately shut down, told not to label her and they would of spotted if she had something like this. So wise mums, this is her Christmas list, what do you think? I’m just going to go private to get her assessed I think, the poor girl is nearly 10 and we’ve spent years trying to find ways to help her tell the time, even the kids clocks which literally spells out what the time is🙁

Like others have said the spelling is very similar to my dyslexic DD. My DD really struggled with reading and one day said to me I don’t know what others are looking at on the white board (not even knowing that the teacher was writing words on the board). At 7 school screened her and she passed but had a spiky profile. Then they bought in a senco from another school who had trained in some kind of dyslexia testing but again she passed but with lots of anomalies
I still wasn’t happy and paid for a private assessment via Patoss and she was dyslexic with a high IQ which is how she passed the school screening tests. I’m very glad I was persistent

The whole "don't label" thing makes me so cross. It's a diagnosis, not a label, and the self knowledge that provides can be so beneficial. Without a diagnosis children often self-label with all kinds of less pleasant words damaging to self esteem, or their peers do it for them. Bring on the proper diagnostic "labels"!

Nobody, even a qualified assessor, can tell you from a writing sample but with the family history plus the difficulties she's having, I would say it's definitely worth a full assessment. You could ask the school to share the results of any screener they have done with you, but at the end of the day a screener is just a risk assessment and you'll need a full assessment anyway for a detailed picture of the areas of strength and difficulty, and tailored recommendations for adjustments and support. DS's dyslexia assessment was the best £400 I've ever spent on him. His school told me there was no way he was dyslexic and two teachers and a Senco with many decades of experience between them missed it...so I know how difficult it is when your child's teachers are telling you you're worried about nothing.

Patois or BDA have lists of assessors.

All of these comments have been really helpful thank you so much. Private assessment is definitely the way forward so will get this sorted asap!

Posters keep,saying that it looks like how a dyslexic child would spell but how would that differ from a child who is just poor at spelling?

I think it looks concerning.

However, whether it's worth pursuing a diagnosis might depend on what you think the school could do differently if she had one - hopefully the extra reading help she is getting now will be phonics-based and done by someone who understands dyslexia.

There may be things that the class teacher can do to help with concentration, memory, and so on, and things that they can do to help with her confidence by (e.g.,) not marking all her spellings wrong on something but commenting on the ideas, or letting someone else do the writing for work in science or topic, or giving her partly-written worksheets to fill in instead of having to copy lots down in her book etc. But none of that necessarily needs a diagnosis really. They should be doing what they can to support her already.

The diagnosis might be helpful for you and her to understand what is going on, or to make sure that the teachers are aware - and it might be particularly useful when she transfers to secondary, so that they already have some support in place right from the beginning; it could make getting extra time/readers etc in SATs next year easier as well. But a diagnosis of dyslexia isn't likely to change the quality or quantity of the support they can offer at school, sadly. You might have to go to a private tutor for that. And most private tutors will work with a child whatever name is given to their difficulties, or whether they have a name at all, by trying to figure out what helps and doesn't help that specific child.

So it's worth thinking about what you hope to get from a diagnosis, and then making sure you are pursuing that anyway, either while you are waiting for the appointment, or potentially instead.

Schools and Ed psychs don't diagnose but schools can usually do a screening test that shows areas of concern and can refer to ed psych who can also do standardised tests. You would need to go private for a dyslexia assessment. What are the school actually doing to support? Keep pushing, it'll be harder to sort in high school. Not right that the school aren't listening to your concerns, I'd take the Christmas list to the Senco and see what she says..

I guess the other risk factors that come with it - bio parent with dyslexia/adhd, not just her spelling but also her reading/maths/timekeeping, appearing to day-dream/zone out in class so I think her spelling is just part of a bigger picture

Partly because it's really bad spelling!

I wasn't very good at spelling when I was younger, but I would change a letter around or put e before I or miss a letter out.

My dyslexic DS spells pretty much every single word incorrectly and sometimes it's hard to work out what it says, whereas poor spelling tends to just be the odd letter.

The first word in the list 'bike' is a good example, as is 'desk'. (Desg)

She gets one to one for extra help with reading but that’s it. When school senco was mentioned I got shut down with poor school funding, which doesn’t surprise me as I have a younger DS who has a speech disorder and had to go private for him to get the help he now gets, which is only a fortnightly visit with an nhs speech therapist but luckily he’s also in private speech therapy!

Ahh the quote should have been the person who was asking what was the difference between bad spelling - sorry.

@TootMootZoot good question. There is no difference.

Your dc has made several spelling errors but I can decipher most of it.

I carry out cognitive and attainment assessments (not dyslexia specifically because there isn't a specific dyslexia assessment).

How far behind is your dc in her learning?

God you’ve just reminded me all the nights before school/ after coming home from school consoling her crying her eyes out that she is stupid and she doesn’t understand anything and her brain doesn’t work properly😢

This was me. My school told my parents the same thing, I didn't get my diagnosis until college. Please push for as much support as you can get her.

As a parent who was fobbed off for years with both of my kids (the school denied their dyslexia, ASD and Dyspraxia), I would trust YOUR instincts above what any teacher says.

I've spent the last 5 years fighting the system. It's cost me £8,000 on 9 private reports but we now have an EHCP for each child, one child in SEN school and another very close to it. It should all be in place in time for GCSEs.

These teachers are not qualified to say whether or not your child is dyslexic. Find an Educational Psychologist. Look on the British Dyslexia Association website or join a local SEN Facebook group and ask for recommendations on there. Our primary school persistently denied my child's dyslexia despite them being diagnosed with it by two separate Ed Psych's (4 year's apart). BTW, we found the LAs Ed Psych's were next to useless and downplay any difficulties or deliberately do the wrong kind of assessments so don't count on any of them to assess properly.

Also, if you have any other concerns, see your GP.

I agree that your child needs an assessment but I would go with someone qualified to diagnose the dyslexia and the ADHD eg an ed psych rather than a dyslexia only assessor. You describe her as having inattentive type ADHD symptoms. The handwriting may also be caused by another issue eg dyspraxia or dysgraphia.

@Knackeredmommy ed psychs can and do diagnose dyslexia but usually you have to see someone privately rather than relying on an LA one. In my LA they won’t diagnose dyslexia and only use the term specific learning difficulties- DS now has dyslexia in his EHCP because a private EP used the term.

@ThreeGoldBars I would suggest that your DD learns to touch type, even if she isn’t dyslexic is a very useful skill to have.

@Skiphopbump, sorry I meant Ed psychs referred by school, yes they can assess for dyslexia privately.

My youngest wasn't spotted as dyslexic until he went to Grammar and I asked for my eldest to be assessed when he went to the same Grammar for A levels. I had to pay for both to see an educational psychologist once school told me it was necessary.
Neither boys regretted their assessments because it helped them with extra time, both at school and Uni.

Very similar to my dyslexic DD at that age.

My 15yo ds writing looks just the same and has done for a number of years, confirmed he has dyslexia. Can you get her tested?

I was put off having my DD assessed for years by her schools. She underperformed in tests and exams regularly but they weren't worried because they said she'd had an off day or was worried etc or our expectations were unrealistic. We finally organised an assessment after A levels. She is dyslexic and with a few minor adjustments graduated with a first!

Thank you all, I’ve been emailing with an educational psychologist in Manchester today, she’s been very helpful and has also mentioned getting in contact with someone closer to me to save a long commute.
Me and DD were doing her homework tonight on the chrome book, and as always she said half way through “it just hurts my brain so much”, I used to think it was a way to try getting out of doing it, and would tell her it’s nearly done so let’s just finish it up. Well tonight I just hugged her tightly and said “I know it does and I’m sorry, we’re going to find ways to help that”. Her little eyes genuinely lit up as if to say mum finally gets in🥺
Sorry! Am all in the feels tonight😂