Really worried about 1 year old but Dr doesn't seem bothered!

[Herewegoagain1990]

Hi,
my 1 year old is still only having formula Ive tried everything I can think of to get him to try eating but he point blank refuses! He won't even try puree just firmly shuts his mouth he won't try solids either but will happily put toys etc in his mouth but won't try any food whatsoever. I'm really worried but Dr just said so long as he's not losing weight it's fine. 6 months now I've been trying to feed him and its not happening. Please does anyone have any experience with this. On a separate note he also will only sleep in his pram. Is he just fussy? Don't know what to do!

Could you contact your health visitor for some advice?

I've booked a appointment for her to come and see him but it's not for a couple of weeks. The advice she gave me so far, dropping a feed, offering finger food etc hasn't worked .

Hi. Whilst waiting for the HV appointment try messy food play. Sit him on a mat on the floor with a bowl with some angle delight in put a toy in it he loves. Let him just play with it. No encouragement to eat it. Maybe some gets on his fingers and he accidentally has a taste. Let him rub it in his hair, on his face etc and just praise him. It's about desensitising

The website and Instagram Solid Starts has a lot of good information on how to deal with challenging infant/toddler feeding issues.

When you say he only sleeps in his pram is that over night too?

Stop trying to make him eat. He may be picking up on your stress and that will make him feel to stressed to try something new.

Instead, make edible things a fun playtime activity that you don't expect or encourage him to put in his mouth, but just have as play things. Build towers out of cubes of melon, cut triangles, circles and squares from pieces of pepper. If you have a shape-sorter toy, remove the normal plastic/wood shapes and replace them with edible versions and just play together. At the end of play time if what's left is still hygenic you can have it as a snoothie or soup but hopefully without the pressure of expectationn some of the play pieces may end up being chewed a bit?

Do you sit him in a high chair at the table while you eat, to share your food, rather than just looking at him and trying to get him to eat ?

Hi, yes he sits in a high chair at the table I don't encourage him to eat just let him play with it. Msybevyoyr right I'm probably getting too stressed svoutbit. Yeah he sleeps in pram at night as he won't sleep anywhere else

The fact he is still taking formula is good. I agree with the majority that removing all pressure to est at all is the best way forward. Focus on messy play and experimenting with textures.

is he ok with getting dirty?

with the feeding issues and sleeping issues I would keep in close contact with your HV as they could be early indicators of autism or similar, but they could just be him being a 1 year old! No harm keeping an eye though.

I'd also cut things up size appropriate and let him play without any input from you. Just sit next to me and you eat exactly what he has. Every day, three times a day with no pressure or persuading. He might eventually decide to copy you and try it out.

Thanks everyone will try all those

@Herewegoagain1990 I feel for you as I had similar with DD, but not to the exact same extent as you.
DD refused to swallow food, unless it was a strawberry.
She wouldnt touch puree, didnt like spoons and would happily drink milk all day if I let her.
We went down the baby led weaning route but with chunks of everything, nothing mashed. She would happily pick things up and put it in her mouth but spat it all back out.
HV was useless and told me to stop 2 out of her 4 feeds a day to basically starve her into eating which we refused to do.

At 10 months we somehow turned a corner and she became more interested. I started serving her food in more bite size portions, so if i gave her toast rather than give strips, i would cut it into small squares. She seemed to like practising the pincer grasp and small bits of food appealed.
I also put muself under alot of pressure so I started giving her food then ignoring her and let her do her own thing.
I think when I stopped fussing and crying over it, she gave in and started eating.
Her favourite foods are chicken and pasta with a tomato saice, she now inhales those.

There are a couple of things which may be worth looking at.
Has he ever had any reflux? That can affect eating to some extent.
Any tongue tie? Again can affect moving food aroind inside the mouth.

I presume you’re eating at the same time, when he’s at the table? Can you make sure you’re eating something similar to him?

Thank you. Yeah I think it is partly my fault because I do get so upset and stressed about it which I'm not going to now. I'll just continue letting him play and do it at his own pace. I wasn't sure how to handle it as his brother was the total opposite, he loves his food! I agree the health visitor told me to Starve him into submission too but I would never do that!

Its so hard not to get stressed but it isnt your fault.
Im coming to realise now that all babies do things in their own time. They make their own milestones when they need to and dont follow statistics.
I have cried alot during the last almost 11months. I dont cry normally. Im a bit of a miserable cow who lacks empathy.
But my god its been hard. I have worried about every single detail, sometimes with right to do so but often ive been on Google and got stressed.
Give yourself a break, you sound like an amazing mum who is just worried about their little lad.
He will get there im sure.

Ah, DD has time travelled. You have my sympathy - I tried really hard to feed DD by spoon (as she clearly didn't want to feed herself), and she vomited whenever I got anything in her mouth. So that's one to avoid.

I was very stressed at the time. What helped me was to separate eating solids and getting enough nutrition. Milk is really good nutritionally (though you need to be using a follow-on formula as they have more iron in them - I got that wrong), so your DS is getting what he needs nutritionally, he just needs to learn the skill of eating solids.

I just kept offering DD food and eventually she ate some of it. A dietitian recommended chicken nuggets and chocolate as easy textures which also satiate hunger - DD would eat organix crisps (like wotsits) but they weren't teaching her that food helps with hunger.

Happy to chat more if that's helpful.

My niece wouldn't eat. Eventually it was discovered she had a general muscle weakness and actually could not swallow easily. It affected her speech too - she struggles to form certain sounds.
Keep at it - insist on further investigation.

Ask for a referral to a pediatric dietician. The health visitor's advice sounds dangerous and misinformed.

Thanks so much everyone for your support. Amazingly this evening he was very hungry as we got home late. I just made a bottle up then I thought I think I'll try him with puree and he ate nearly a whole pouch! I cried but tears of joy this time! ♥️

My dd ate bugger all until 11 months and then it was just a few crumbs, finally ate more at 14 months. She's just very stubborn and wants to do everything in her own time!

My DS was similar. Not to the same extent to yours but he didn't eat much at all (nor formula)
Hv advised to cut down the formula, even though he was only having 3 bottles a day (he was 9 months) so i cut out the middle of the day one. Took a few days but it did work in the end. He's 2.5 now, still eats little and VERY fussy but i have given up the food battle. He eats when he's hungry, the same things over and over but as long as he's eating i leave him to it 😊

My first didn't eat until 1.5 due to feeding aversion (milk and solids). We left little grazing trays around all day every day for him to investigate with no comment. He eats now at 3.5, but still needs to graze at his own leisure, absolutely no pressure. To the extent that there are little tubs of dry cereal and spoons next to his bed for the morning. It's messy but he eats, so we just hoover lots...

Another recommendation for checking out the solid starts Instagram page and website, so much free information including picky eating/food refusal content and it is all evidence based advice. I have found it so helpful whenever I’ve felt worried/stressed about anything related to weaning and nutrition. Good luck!